Page 75 of Sour Lollipops and Sweet Nightmares
“Gigi, are you there?”
“Yeah, Mom, I’m here,” I said into the phone while searching the shadowed corners of the room. Everything seemed normal.
“Honey, are you okay? You seem a bit distracted.”
“I’m fine,” I sighed. “Just a bit shaken up.”
“I’m sure you are. Witnessing a fight like that would be terrifying to anyone.”
It was more than that. I went to a public high school in a rough part of town. Seeing a full-on smackdown fight was nothing new. Boys had this weird thing with violence. They could beat someone up so bad they put them in the hospital, then be best friends with that same person the next day. Not that the new relationship would prevent anything. Guys seemed to like punching their friends just as much as their enemies.
I didn’t understand the male species. Then again, I didn’t understand women either, especially when it came to the girl world. None of the so-called rules made sense. Why couldn’t I go to the bathroom alone? How would hearing each other pee make Rachel and me better friends?
“Did you know the boys?”
“No.” I lied.
She didn’t need to know about Issac and his friends. Mom wasn’t a worrier or anxious like me. She was overprotective. In grade two, I had a bully. Chad Dickerson was constantly pulling my hair and picking on me until Mom cornered him in the playground.
I don’t know what she said to him, but he wouldn’t even look my way after that. The last thing I wanted her to do was showup here and confront Issac. I didn’t want her anywhere near that man. If I believed in heaven and hell, then Issac would be the antichrist.
“That’s good,” Mom said. “You should stay away from guys like that.”
That was the ironic statement of the year. I was more than happy to avoid well… everyone. Yet people kept talking to me and showing up. Then there was Issac, who probably sat up at night thinking of ways to torment me. So, why did I help him?
Out of everything that happened today, it was that moment that kept rolling through my mind. Issac was clearly a psychopath, yet when I saw the blood running down his arm, my first instinct was to grab the first aid kit. I could still feel Issac staring down at me as the tweezers clicked in my hand.
I was terrified of setting him off. Here was a man who had already assaulted me. What if I breathed or moved in the wrong way? It was a serious concern, one I hadn't considered at the time.
When one of Mom’s boyfriends got a little too physical, she hit him on the head with a cast-iron frying pan, locked him out of the apartment, and called the cops. But not me. No. I had to help Issac. Apparently, self-preservation skipped a generation.
Rachel didn’t understand my actions either. That was made quite clear in the twenty-minute lecture she gave me after Ravi left. Not that I could blame her. I liked to think of myself as an intelligent person. Maybe I was wrong.
“Are you sure you’re okay, Gigi?”
Was I okay? I honestly didn’t know anymore. “I’m fine, Mom.”
The upside of being a solitary individual was that I didn’t have to worry about what other people thought or said. The downside was that the one person I did spend time with knew when I was lying.
“Uh-huh,” Mom muttered. “Then why did it take you so long to call me back?”
“I don’t know, I got busy and forgot.” It wouldn’t be the first time I forgot to call her back.
“Honey, I love you, but don’t lie to me.”
I rolled my eyes. “You’re overthinking it.”
“Then why did it sound like you were having a panic attack when you called earlier?”
That was easy. Iwashaving a panic attack. At that point, I was scared and wanted to go home. If Ravi hadn’t shown up, then I’d probably be halfway there already. Things were different now. I was still scared, but I was also determined not to let Issac win. Emotion got the best of me before. That wouldn’t happen again. I would not be scared away.
“Gigi?”
Knowing she wouldn’t let it go until I gave her some kind of explanation, I said, “It was a rough day, that’s all.”
“Georgia…”
“I’m fine, Mom.” I cut her off before she could go into some lecture, which was the only time she called me Georgia.
