Page 71 of Cinder
Show him that I’ve got nothing to hide.
And hope to God he doesn’t see through it.
Riding the bus to the clubhouse, I decide I need to talk to him before he has a chance to overthink it. So when I arrive to work, I make him a coffee and take it to his room as an apology for my abrupt departure last night. But just as I’m walking along the hallway toward his room, the door opens and Bambi steps into the hallway. Dressed in nothing but a baby tee withKiss Me, Cowboysplashed across her ample chest, and a tiny pair of lace panties, she looks sleepy and crumpled like she just woke up.
A sick feeling sweeps through me.
“Oh hey, Ella,” she says when she sees me, stretching her arms above her head and yawning.
Feeling stupid and disappointed, I force a smile. “Hey, Bambi.”
“Is that for Lars?” she asks, eyeing the coffee cup in my hand. “I think he’s going to need it. Neither of us got much sleep last night.”
Bambi seems sweet, and I can tell she isn’t saying any of this to hurt me. She just doesn’t know that seeing her leave his room and hearing that they didn’t get much sleep feels like a giant kick in my stomach.
Even though it shouldn’t.
I look at the coffee cup in my hand.
What the hell am I doing?
“You know what? Here, it’s yours if you want it,” I say.
Her eyes light up as she takes it from me. “You are the best. Thank you.”
She takes a sip and moans, and it’s too easy in that moment to think about what Lars did to make her moan last night.
“I thank the heavens that you work here now. No one makes the coffee as good as you.” She takes a sip and moans again. “Please don’t let Mrs. V. scare you off.”
I can’t help but smile. Bambi is cute and bubbly, and I don’t think she has a mean bone in her body.
“I won’t,” I say.
She holds up her pinky finger. “Pinky swear?”
Again, I smile as I curl my pinky around hers. “I swear.”
Then surprising the hell out of me, she kisses me on the cheek before bouncing down the hallway and out of view.
Not wanting to run into Lars, I escape to the kitchen and try to force the idea of him and Bambi spending the night together out of my head as I’m working. But it’s more difficult than it should be. Because I was looking forward to his return and felt the zip of excitement when he arrived. Felt the insane desire as he kissed me like he couldn’t get enough of me. It really felt like—what?
Like something was happening between us?
Like he wanted more than friendship?
Yes, that’s exactly how it felt.
But it was obviously all in my head, and I’m an idiot for even thinking it.
So when Lars comes in for his morning coffee, I actively avoid him, choosing to mop the floors instead of talking to him, to hide the lingering disappointment in my chest.
But Lars being Lars picks up on it straight away.
“Everything okay, Firecracker?” he asks, pouring himself a coffee as I mop the floors across the room.
“Just busy,” I say, refusing to look at him because I feel so damn stupid for letting this get to me so much. And he’d see it in my eyes. The disappointment. The hurt.The embarrassment.Then he’d wonder why someone he doesn’t even know or have any loyalty to is upset because he spent the night with a gorgeous blonde with gorgeous hair, a gorgeous face, and a gorgeous body.
When his back is turned, I sneak out the side door to empty the mop bucket into the courtyard drain, hoping he’ll be gone by the time I step back inside.
