Page 47 of Single Mom's Navy Seals
“Absolutely,” I promise without hesitation. “We’ll play water fight every day if you want.”
He beams brightly, exhaustion momentarily forgotten. “Good. I like it here, Mama. It feels safe.”
My heart aches, love and protectiveness swelling painfully. “I’m glad, Eli. That’s all I’ve ever wanted for you.”
He nods solemnly, slipping his small hand into mine. Together, we walk toward the cabin, footsteps crunching softly in the dirt. As we near the porch, Eli pauses, tugging on my hand.
“Mama?” he asks hesitantly, eyes wide and curious. “Do you think Liam, Jax, and Cole like it here, too? Do you think they like us?”
Cole didn’t need to say anything earlier. The way he held me, careful and grounding, said enough. I think he does like us. Maybe more than he even realizes. My breath catches, heart speeding up at the question. I manage a gentle smile, squeezing his hand reassuringly.
“I think they do, sweetheart. They’re good men, but baby, you know that they are just staying with us for a little bit, right?”
He dismisses the last part of my response. “I think they like us, too. Especially you. Jax told me he thinks you’re pretty.”
My eyes widen, and my son gives me a devious little smile. “You were talking about me with Jax?”
“Uh-huh. I asked him if he had a girlfriend, and he said no—” Why does that make my heart skip a beat? “—and then I asked him if he would make you his girlfriend.”
“What?” I screech, eyes practically bugged out of my head.
“Well, yeah. You need a boyfriend, Mama, and I think Jax or Liam or Cole would all be good.” He gives me a pitiful look. “But you’re so short that I think you can’t be with people who are too tall, so that’s why I asked Jax. He’s shorter than them.”
“Eli, baby, hold on! You can’t?—”
“What? He said that he can’t make you his girlfriend unless you say so, but he thinks you’re very pretty.” He finishes with a bright grin as if he didn’t just completely upend my whole day.
Jax thinks I’m pretty? My son wants me to have a boyfriend?
Wait.
“Who taught you about boyfriends and girlfriends?”
“I saw it on TV when I was with Jax. The ice queen’s sister kissed the guy with the reindeer, and I thought it was super gross because that’s not his mama. But Jax said that boyfriends and girlfriends kiss.”
“What else did he tell you about boyfriends and girlfriends?” I ask suspiciously.
“He said that they are like super best friends. They hang out all the time and tell jokes to each other and live in the same house sometimes.” I relax at that, but tense right back up at what he says next. “I asked Jax if that meant that you have three boyfriends, but he said that you guys don’t kiss, so no. So, you have to kiss them so you can be boyfriend and girlfriend.”
“Oh my god,” I mutter, folding my head into my hands in disbelief.
“Okay!” Eli exclaims already moving on from the conversation. “I’m ready to water fight again. I catched my breath.”
“Caught,” I correct automatically. “And we are out of water. We should refill them.”
Eli snatches my gun from me and takes off toward the house. “I got it! I’ll ask Liam to help me. Be right back!”
I watch the door swing shut behind Eli, his small, excited footsteps fading into the cabin. My heart still pounds erratically from our conversation, and I struggle to gather my scattered thoughts. The silence of the desert around me is almost deafening, broken only by distant birdsong and the gentle rustling of leaves. The late afternoon sun bathes everything in awarm, golden glow that feels oddly comforting despite the chaos in my mind.
My thoughts inevitably turn back to Liam. He’s been avoiding me all day, making himself scarce inside the cabin and offering no more than a grunt or two when we accidentally crossed paths. He’s obviously still uncomfortable, and the tension between us has been nearly unbearable, and it’s only increased since the kiss with Jax.
That kiss completely fucked my head up, and I simply don’t know how to face him, how to talk about something that felt so right but complicated everything in my heart and mind. Even worse, it’s not just Jax. That kiss, the spark of attraction that it ignited, has forced me to admit an uncomfortable truth to myself—I’m attracted to Liam and Cole too.
I want three men, and if I’m honest with myself, I want them all equally. How screwed up is that? How desperate am I for affection, for love, if my heart thinks falling for three men simultaneously is a good idea? And not just any three men—three protectors assigned by Morales to keep us safe from my abusive ex-husband. The irony of that isn’t lost on me. It’s almost laughable if it didn’t ache so deeply.
Eli’s earlier words echo painfully in my mind. Jax told me he thinks you’re pretty.
My heart skips again, just as it did when Eli first said it. The thought that Jax said that about me, even casually, makes heat rise in my cheeks. But mixed with the thrill is the painful awareness of what Eli is really searching for in these men and the fact that he’ll never get it. He’s spent his whole life without a father figure. He’s always taken my vague answers about Randy in stride, but I’ve noticed the longing in his eyes more often ashe grows older. A boy needs a man he can look up to, someone strong and steady to model himself after. I can’t give him that, no matter how hard I try.
