Page 62 of Third Time is the Charm
And she was only lying to herself if she thought she could deny him – deny them – that chance.
“I can’t promise that I’ll be able to keep my hands off of you,” he continued, his eyes burning into hers as they both pictured just what those hands could do. “No, actually, I promise you that Iwon’tkeep these hands from touching every fucking sweet and soft inch of you. I promise you that I will pleasure you, I will fuck you, I will love you until your body craves me more than it craves air.”
Her teeth clamped down on her lower lip as her thighs cinched closer together. The seriously seductive promise already putting her body on edge, aching for him to fulfill it. Instead, he forged on while Beth sat there as moisture pooled thickly between her thighs.
“But more than that, I promise that I will be open with you – whatever you ask, whatever you need, I will do it and not because I don’t have a choice, but because you deserve so much more than I’ve given you.”
Her heart felt like it was going to explode and yet her head was throwing up red flags left and right; warning signs that this road was not safe for travel.
Honesty deserves honesty.
“I’m scared,” she admitted, tears falling down her cheeks. “I’m sorry that I left before thinking or giving you the chance to explain about Caroline. I’m sorry that I was weak. I couldn’t think about anything; all I knew was that it felt like my heart had stopped and if I didn’t get away from everything, it might never start again. I left then because I was hurt and scared. Now, I’m just scared that I’m not what you need.” The ache in her chest was just as prominent as the one between her thighs. She wanted to say more but she couldn’t find the words; she didn’t know how to tell him everything that she felt even though she felt the words burning in the back of her throat.
Darcy sighed; his gaze breaking from hers just as she saw her pain and fear mirrored in them.
“Can I ask you something?” He looked back to her, watching the slightly perplexed expression cross her face.
What more could he ask of her?She wondered. Her head jerked with a swift nod knowing that she needed to find out whatever it was.
“Why did you leave again after the wedding?” he asked, the hurt from his eyes radiating out through his voice.
Beth grimaced at the question and the change in the direction of the conversation; the part of her that wondered how to answer him was far too slow compared to her heart that spoke the truth it had been holding on to.
“Because I don’t know how not to…”
His brow furrowed, “I don’t understand.”
“I left because I don’t know how not to think about you, Darcy,” she answered with a sigh, the words caged inside of her finally being set free. “Especially when it’s late at night and I’m crying – which is not infrequent since I moved here; I don’t know how to not think about you. I thought that I should have been the one who is strong and just moves on no matter what you do or say, and that is what I fully intended to do at Jane’s wedding, but instead, I fell right back into your arms – just like I’ve wanted to do every night before… and every night since.” With every admission, her voice raised in irritation with herself. “And every morning for the past five months, I wake up trying to ignore how much I hate myself for the way that I can’t help but still want you;I just don’t know how not to.”
“So then don’t,” he whispered back, his unrelenting stare boring straight into her heart, begging it to give in to him one more time.
“I don’t know if I can,” she choked out. “How many times have we tried this? Our personalities don’t know how to work together; we’re too independent and there are too many secrets between us. How many times are we going to try this?”
“One time.This time.This time I’m going to fucking get it right,” he swore.
“How? Are we just going to get lucky?” she asked, her voice breathless with disbelief. “What is this ‘third time is the charm’ thinking? I don’t think luck can save us.”
“I don’t need luck; all I need is one chance to show you I can deserve your love.” Darcy’s eyes sparked with the emotion behind his words; the weight of his request falling between them stifling out whatever remained of her concerns.
Beth just stared silently at him, a war raging inside of her between her heart and her mind.
Except, it wasn’t a war; it was a hostile take-over… that wasn’t really that hostile.
Darcy continued before she had a chance to waive the white flag – and fall back into his arms. “Beth, I understand,” he began solemnly. “I completely understand why part of you wants this to be over. And if you tell me to, I will go through the motions of walking away. I can leave you alone and send the rest of your things that are still sitting in my closet back to you; I can try to find plenty of shit to fill my day. But, I don’t know how to not think about you either.” He paused, his hand coming up to cover his mouth for a second before he spoke again. “I’m not the same person I was when you left. I could give you reasons, I could give you proof, but I don’t want to just tell you. Please give me the chance to show you, gorgeous; give me the chance to love you.”
She swallowed hard, her eyes dropping to stare at the hard planes of his chest. She watched her hand, as though it wasn’t her own, reach up to place her palm over his heart feeling the firm muscle beneath her fingers twitch at her touch; she felt the white-hot heat start to spread through her fingers, into her hand, up her arm, and into the rest of her body;it was always like this.
“And if I want you to show me everything? No more secrets,” she whispered, her eyes finally moving up to meet his intense stare that now burned with his need for her, ignited by her touch.
“I will show you anything you want, gorgeous.Any. Fucking. Thing,” he rasped. “Just tell me where you want me to start.”
There was silence for a second, but that second was in slow motion, their love that they’d tried to deny for each other heightening their desire; their need replaced all of the oxygen in the air so that with every breath, all that fueled their bodies was passion.
There was a time for words and then there were times when no words would do. There were so many uncertainties, so many doubts floating around, the only thing that she knew for certain was how much she missed being with him – the physical connection to him was her one stable life-line; it was the one thing she could count on not to change. It was the one thing that hadn’t changed and it was the one thing that had been missing these past few months, making her feel like she was living in some sort of alternate reality where she was only half present.
She wanted him – she didn’t know how not to. And, God help her, she’d tried.
“For now, just show me how much you want me,” she demanded, her hand curling into his shirt, pulling him towards her.
