Page 55 of Third Time is the Charm
Losing him had broken her heart. Feeling like it was because of a failure on her part had broken her.
“Oh, Beth, I’m sorry.” Her dad’s worried voice broke through her thoughts and she realized that she had begun to shake with the attempt to restrain her sobs. “I didn’t mean to tell you that to make you cry, I’m sorry…”
She hiccupped trying to catch her breath and find her voice.
“No, please,” she choked out. “I’m sorry. I’m ok. It’s just… everything that you said…it’s the truth. Please, I’m not… upset… with you. I want to know.” She took another tissue from the box that he had set on the couch. “Please…”
“The same hurt that I see in your face right now is what I saw on his that day, realizing how deeply he had hurt you,” her dad continued, hesitantly.
“What did he say?”
“He said that you hadn’t let him down, that he was the one who’d let you down – that he’d been letting you down the whole time you were together.”
“He said that?” Beth asked in quiet astonishment. Darcy rarely admitted fault – even to her, but especially to someone he barely knew, like her father. Not that her father would hold it against him in any way, but it just wasn’t Darcy’s personality.
“He didn’t just say it, Beth, he meant it. And he didn’t say it to me, he said it to himself – like he was finally seeing himself and how he treats others, especially you, for the first time. I think it was an epiphany for him… I know it was.” Mr. Bennet reached his arms around Beth and hugged her as the last of her tears fell onto his shoulder. “I know you’ll figure it out; I just thought you should know before you head back.”
“Thanks, dad,” Beth whispered. She held onto him, needing his comfort for another minute – something that she’d sorely missed in Boston. “I miss you.”
“I miss you, too, Beth,” he replied, pulling back from her. “I’m so proud of you.”
“Thanks,” she said sheepishly, giving him a small smile before standing up and taking her pile of tissues over to the garbage can by her dad’s desk.
“Don’t be so hard on yourself, Beth,” he continued. “Or him for that matter. But, mostly you; sometimes, the heart wants what it wants, even if rationally it makes no sense. Just look at your mother and I.” Mr. Bennet concluded with a wry smile to which Beth couldn’t help herself but to return.
“I know,” she found herself admitting “I just wish he made it easier for me to be able to accept that.”
“Well, love is not easy, that is for sure. I apologize if I ever gave you the impression that it was.”
“No, no,” Beth assured him. “I didn’t think it would be easy, I guess I just didn’t think it would be so complicated – no, not even that. I didn’t think I would want something, or someone, who made me feel so complicated.”
Her father stood, making his way over and giving her another hug. “Sometimes, life is complicated. Other times, we make life more complicated than it needs to be. Listen to your heart, decide what it is that you want and then work for it – just like you’ve done for everything else in your life; love is no different.
“Thanks, dad.” She sighed into his shoulder and then stepped out of his comforting embrace before she found herself unwilling to return to Boston. “I should get going.”
Her dad nodded, motioning her towards the door and following her out of the study. As they walked into the hall the front door opened to reveal Mrs. Bennet, Kat, and Mary.
“Oh, Beth!” Irene exclaimed, surprise written all over her face at seeing her daughter. “I thought you would have left by now.” She set her bags down inside the door, knowing that her husband would be the one to take them upstairs for her. Meanwhile, Kat and Mary acknowledged their sister before heading to the kitchen to find something to eat.
“I’m on my way out,” Beth explained, hoping that would still be the case…
“Oh, dear, that’s unfortunate. I feel like I didn’t get to talk to you at all this weekend. But, that Colin,” she paused to sigh and dramatically fan herself. Beth rolled her eyes and truly wondered at times like this what her father saw in Irene Bennet. “What a dreamy gentleman. I’m so glad that you brought him to the wedding, he was such a hit with everyone.”
Of course, he was…
“Yeah, he is pretty great,” she replied, trying to sound more enthusiastic about that than she was. Unfortunately, the only thing that she felt when she thought about Colin right now was the overwhelming sense of guilt for everything that had happened – not just between her and Darcy, but between her and him that had led him to believe that there would be more to come.
After last night with Darcy, and in spite of everything that she did feel for Col, it was nowhere near enough. With Darcy, even though there was every complication, there was no comparison.
This time, McDreamy just wasn’t going to cut it.
“Well, I hope we get to see more of him soon – and more of you.” She frowned, remembering that her daughter was leaving again and who knew the next time she would be back in town.
“I’ll be back soon, mom,” Beth offered weakly.
“Hmph.”
She sighed in exasperation. Maybe it was the talk with her dad, maybe it was some of the relief she felt after hearing Darcy’s confession last night, but she found herself feeling much more patient with her mother than usual, which is why she continued to press forward in their conversation.
