Page 11 of Third Time is the Charm
“Really? Like in the Wedding Date?” she joked, surprised at the quick comeback she was able to retort even as her heart picked up speed realizing that he wanted to be her date to Jane’s wedding.
“Exactly, although Dermott is notnearlyas entertaining as I am – trust me, I’ve met him.”
“The real question is though – are you a better dancer?” Her eyebrows raised, daring him to answer.
“You’ll just have to invite me and find out for yourself,” he said as the car stopped in front of her building. Colin got out, again extending his hand to help her – which was a good thing because she was definitely less stable on her feet this time around.
Holding onto him for a not insubstantial amount of support, they walked to the door of her building, Col insisting that he escort her up to her apartment since there were stairs involved.
“Thank you,” she said softly as they stopped in front of her door.
His fingers tilted her chin up as he replied, “No, thank you.”
Beth bit her lip, knowing whatnormallyhappened at this point – or at least what she felt like he was hoping would happen. “I’m sorry, Col. I’m a complete mess – you know that. I don’t know what you see in me or what you could possibly want from me…” she trailed off. The alcohol and her sadness making her forget just exactly where she was going with that.
“Beth, I just want you and your completely beautiful mess in whatever way you’ll let me have it,” he whispered, staring at her intently, trying to make sure she understood just how serious he was.
She gave the slightest of nods, probably imperceptible to the eye, but because his fingers were still on her chin, she knew he could feel it.
A small smile spread to his face. “I had an incredible time. And don’t forget, for you, my dance moves and I are available if you want us.” Beth smiled at his humor, his hand leaving her chin to fall at his side. “Goodnight, Beth. I’ll see you on Monday.”
With that, he stepped away from her like the gentlemen that he was and turned back towards the stairwell. For a second, she stood frozen, her thoughts a jumble over what had happened, what she thought was going to happen, what she wanted or didn’t want or didn’t know what she wanted to happen. The next thing she knew, his name flew from her mouth and he immediately paused and turned to face her.
Beth watched as her possessed body closed the distance between them, stood up on her toes and pressed her lips to his. She could feel his shock at her action before he relaxed against her; his hand moved up to cup her face for just a moment, pulling her lips hard against his before he let go and pulled back –like the gentleman he was.
“Goodnight, Beth,” he said with his dazzling, movie-star smile, disappearing into the stairwell, leaving her to stand speechless in the hallway – stunned not by him or his response, but by hers.
What had she been thinking?
Had she wanted to kiss him or had she just wanted to know what it would be like to kiss someone after Darcy?
Unlocking her door, the familiar pit returned to her stomach as she wished she hadn’t done what she’d just done – not because it had given Colin the wrong idea, not because it had encouraged him on something that might not happen; no, she wished she hadn’t done it because she hadn’t felt anything. She hadn’t felt the all-consuming desire sear through her cells like she did when Darcy kissed her. She didn’t think she felt desire at all.
It hadn’t been a bad kiss.
No, it hadn’t. It just hadn’t demanded more – then again, nothing with Colin ever did. Beth set her purse down and walked into her tiny bedroom to change into her pajamas.
Brushing her teeth, she thought about the last time she’d been out to dinner with someone, it had been Darcy; this had been nothing like that.Col was nothing like him.And that, surprisingly – or not – made a big difference.
She smiled as she climbed into her bed with a sigh, relaxing into the soft mattress – the one thing she’d splurged on after moving, she smiled as she replayed her and Col’s dinner conversation. She’d listened to his funny stories about when he was younger and acting with his brother, all the funny stuff he’d witnessed Pat do in the spotlight over the years; she’d begun to truly feel relaxed as his relationship with his brother reminded her so much of the one between her and Jane. He made it so easy to feel comfortable around him. Something that never would have happened with Darcy. She could barely get two words out of Darcy on a good day, and here Col was, talking to her like he could go on for hours without any input from her if she didn’t want to give it. In some ways, the contrast between the two of them was refreshing. Col didn’t order her or demand things. He’d asked about the wine at dinner. He’d waited for her to order for herself – something that she ended up giving up control of anyway. He made her feel like he took her thoughts and desires into consideration. It was such a change. Darcy ordered and did everything for her, he took control… he took her. She turned and groaned into her pillow.
In other ways, it was maddening.
Col didn’t push her, he didn’t test her, he didn’t make her work for his affection; not that Darcy made her work for the sake of seeing her struggle – he’d had reasons for being such a tough nut to crack. But that is one of the things that enthralled her about him, that pulled her in; she didn’t feel like she was the only one learning how to have a relationship. She’d made Darcy work too, to open up and not be so demanding, to let her have some of the control.
And then there was Colin’s kiss. It hadn’t consumed her. With Darcy, it was all or nothing – all his emotions or none, all of her body on fire and burning, about to explode, or nothing. Kissing Col was nice, but it was just somewhere in the middle. And it wasn’t just her; he’d pulled away first, happy that she’d kissed him, but not so consumed with passion that he couldn’t let her go. It had still been easy for him to remain a gentleman, whereas Darcy would have had her up against the wall; Darcy would have taken what he wanted – and that was ok because it would have given her what she needed in return too.
With Col, he just gave and gave and gave. And she wished she wanted that.
God, how she wished that she did.
But no, her stupid self didn’t want the knight in shining armor, the gentleman who treated her politely and respectfully. No, her deranged self craved to be consumed, to be pushed to the very limits of everything that she thought she could bear, even though going beyond those limits had almost destroyed her.
Chapter 4
Sometimes, Saturday mornings are for sleeping in and other times, they are for bouts of epiphanies and productivity.
Beth woke up at seven even though she hadn’t set an alarm last night, expecting to need all the sleep she could get after such an interesting and emotional evening. But at seven, she was wide awake without any effects from the wine last night. Maybe she’d been dreaming about him… or about them, but as soon as her eyes registered the sunlight streaming in through the small window in her room, she realized what she needed to do.
