Page 63 of My Highland Rogue
Gordon had been able to rein in his emotions for most of the day, but it had been difficult, especially with Jennifer. The last thing he wanted was to be pushed to the edge of his restraint by Harrison’s words.
“Do you expect me to give you trouble? Why, do you think I want to fight for the right to live in the gardener’s cottage? Don’t be an ass. Or is that an impossible task, Harrison?”
Several people filed into the cottage and looked at the two of them curiously. Gordon didn’t care. Let the world hear what he thought.
“You’re an ass. You’ve been an ass as long as I’ve known you. When you were younger, you were a younger ass. Time has done nothing for your character, your demeanor, or your inability to get along with anyone. You look at the world as if it’s filled with people who are supposed to identify your every whim, then serve it. You don’t see people as they are. Half the time I don’t think you even know someone else is around. I’m genuinely surprised that you ever married.Perhaps your mother had something to say about that, wanting to see you settled before she died.”
“Don’t talk about my mother, you bastard.”
He was so tempted to tell Harrison the truth in that moment. However, he wasn’t about to give the other man either the upper hand or a warning. Instead, let him be blindsided by the court case.
“I’ve never been bothered by names, by the way. You can call me anything you want. I only give credence to those insults from people I respect. Believe me, you’re not among that exalted group. You won’t have any difficulty getting me to leave this accursed place.”
He turned on his heel and left the cottage. Anywhere was preferable to being around Harrison.
Something was wrong, and Jennifer didn’t know what it was.
She hadn’t seen Gordon for more than a few minutes since his father died. Some of that was understandable, because there were preparations that had to be made and Gordon needed to be part of those as Sean’s son.
Twice she’d tried to see him, but had been told that he couldn’t come to the cottage door. She saw him walking toward the loch one afternoon and almost caught up with him. She didn’t, because she knew he’d seen her, yet he made no effort to flag her down or try to capture her attention.
He was avoiding her, but she didn’t know why.
She had meals taken to the cottage. When Moira or Sally returned the trays, they made certain tothank Cook, but didn’t say if Gordon had eaten. She assumed he had, just one of many assumptions she had to make in the past few days.
Although she hadn’t been able to talk with him, she made the funeral arrangements, just as she would have if he’d given her permission. She’d had the chapel opened and aired out, feeling a little shame that there hadn’t been many services there in years. Her mother had been the one to invite the village minister to come and officiate. Harrison hadn’t done it. Nor had she, an oversight that bothered her now.
She had fresh candles put on the altar and in the two chandeliers. An army of maids dusted and swept, polished the windows and ensured everything was spotless for Sean’s funeral.
One of the maids told her that there had been vandalism in the crypt. Together they inspected it and found that things had been tossed around. It only took a few minutes to put everything back in order.
The day of the ceremony Gordon still hadn’t said more than a few words to her. Even when she went to see Sean laid out, Gordon remained silent.
What had she done? Had she said something wrong? Even worse, did he regret asking her to marry him? Had he changed his mind?
There was every possibility that he found her boring. Her life hadn’t been as cosmopolitan as his in the past five years. All she knew was Adaire Hall.
The fact that he hadn’t come to her was more than troubling. They’d always reached out toeach other in times of difficulty. She’d always felt a sense of reassurance to know that Gordon was there for her, yet this behavior was more like those five silent years.
She knew that his relationship with Sean hadn’t been an easy one. However, people handled grief in different ways. Perhaps he was mourning the fact that he and Sean hadn’t been closer. Or it could be that he was realizing his own mortality. Becoming an orphan had that effect on you. At least it had on her.
By midmorning the minister arrived and pronounced all the preparations to his liking. Villagers and staff filed into the chapel until it was near overflowing. Jennifer stood at the door, waiting.
When Gordon entered the chapel, he was accompanied by Moira and Sally. The two nurses had evidently taken to him, enough to behave like his family.
She told him of the arrangements for the funeral and what would follow. Women did not accompany men to the churchyard. She would not be there for Sean’s interment, but had provided refreshments for the men once they returned to Adaire Hall. She expected a sizable number of villagers to also be in attendance.
He only nodded when she finished speaking. She thought he murmured something that sounded likethank you, but couldn’t be certain. Within moments, the three of them had found a seat in the front pew on the other side of the aisle from the one the family used.
He didn’t say another word to her. Nor did he even look in her direction. He acted just like theman who’d first arrived at Adaire Hall—like a stranger who was not predisposed to like anything he saw.
Blessedly, the service was brief. Sean wouldn’t have expected any less. He wasn’t overly devout. Nor had Betty been. There would be another service at the graveside, officiated by the same minister.
She and the rest of the women stood aside as the men gathered in a procession, led by Gordon. As the only male member of Sean’s family, he would lead all of them in the walk to the village church.
She wanted to say something to him, especially standing there as isolated as he appeared. She wanted to go to him and shock the staff by hugging him in full view of everyone. Yet his behavior had been so strange that perhaps she should talk to him in private first. She needed to find out what was wrong between them.
Gordon was unapproachable and intimidating. She found it hard to believe that she had sat on his lap, kissed him, and told him how much she loved him. Or that she had ever once thought of seducing him.
