Page 114 of Beautifully Broken
I close the door to my bedroom once inside to drown out the sound of my mother’s stomping and complaining downstairs.
I make quick work of taking off the tags from my new clothes so I can wash them with my next load of laundry. The last piece is the dress. As I hold it in my hands, I second guess my decision. Does it really look that bad on me?
I slide out of my jeans, pull on the dress on and stride to the bathroom. Glancing at my reflection, my mother's words echo in my head.
Shit, is she right? Does this not look good on me?
Her words from the store repeat in my head as I continue to stare in the mirror, And now I’m questioning, if I’m even pretty at all? Does anything look good on me?
I’m no longer confident in my decision, which has my stomach in knots because I’m letting her get to me. The nausea hits right then too, causing me to dash to the toilet.
The violent retching starts and lasts until my stomach hurts and tears are spilling down my cheeks. I lie on the plush mat, exhausted emotionally and physically. When there aren't any more tears left to cry, I force myself to get up and brush my teeth.
Changing into pajamas, I place the clothes in the hamper before crawling into bed. My phone vibrates in my purse on the bed. Sitting up, I pull it out to see it’s a message from Trevor.
Trevor: Did you buy it?
Instead of responding, I tap his contact and call him. He answers right away.
“Hey Soph.”
“Hi,” I mumble.
I hear him turn down whatever is on in the background. “What happened?”
My heart races. He knows something is wrong just from one word.
“My mom’s a bitch,” I tell him matter-of-factly.
“What did she do?”
I fill him in on our shopping trip from beginning to end, leaving out the last part of what happened in the bathroom.
“Fuck, that’s shitty. I’m glad you bought it, Soph. That dress looks so good on you. Don’t let your mom dictate what you like to wear.”
I sigh. “I know, you’re right. Thank you for listening to me.”
“Always. Anytime, day or night. You know that.” Silence filters over the line as I take in his words and how much they mean to me. “Hey, I have an idea. I have a shoot tomorrow. At the farm out on Route five. Would you like to come?”
I hesitate. “Are you sure you want me to? Won’t I be in the way?”
He chuckles. “You could never be in the way, Soph.”
His words have my stomach doing backflips. He’s being so genuine and sincere and it only makes me fall a little bit harder.
“Okay, then yes. But how about I meet you there?” I ask. I don’t want to hurt his feelings, but if my mom knew I was seeing Trevor outside of the office, she’d be livid.
“I get it. I’ll send you the address. Meet me there at noon.”
“Trevor, thank you,” I whisper.
“For what?” he asks.
“Being here for me,” I tell him before I think better of it.
“That’s what you do when you care about someone,” he says, and I can hear the sincerity in his voice.
I take a shaky breath. “That means a lot. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
