Page 61 of Lord of the Lone Wolf
“You know what I mean.” Auslin lifted the pendant between them, letting it catch the moonlight. “Maseo affected us both. More than he should have.”
The directness of the statement left little room for evasion. Kitsuki sighed, resting his forehead against Auslin’s. “Yes,” he admitted, the confession both a relief and a burden. “My dragon responded to his presence on your skin and the knowledge that his lips were on any part of you.”
“It wasn’t only your dragon. It was you, too.” He tugged the pendant for emphasis. “And this felt like it connected us to him.”
Kitsuki couldn’t deny it. The taste of Maseo had also captivated his rational mind. “This complicates things.”
Auslin’s fingers stilled. “Or does it confirm what we’ve been avoiding since our last conversation about the trinity bond?”
The mention of their previous discussion hung between them, heavy with implication. Since they had acknowledged their mutual interest in Maseo but had agreed to set the matter aside until after the war, it had become the thing they never talked about.
“I worry about what this means for us,” Kitsuki admitted. “For our bond.”
Auslin’s expression softened. “You’re afraid I’ll think less of you for wanting him.”
“Not only that. I swore I would never be like my father, taking multiple lovers and dividing my attention and affection.”
“I understand this isn’t like that,” Auslin said with a confidence that soothed Kitsuki’s dragon. “You’re not betraying me, nor am I betraying you. If what Kizoshi hinted at is true, a trinity bond isn’t about division. It’s about completion.”
“My dragon has no doubts,” he conceded. “But I am not solely my dragon.”
“But when your dragon speaks with such certainty, he’s usually right.”
The acknowledgment drew a small smile from Kitsuki. “He would claim so.”
A more serious expression crossed Auslin’s face. “How will you handle seeing Maseo in battle, knowing how we both feel?”
The question struck at the heart of Kitsuki’s deepest concern. His smile faded, replaced by a troubled frown. “With difficulty. My dragon already fights me on the matter. We want to keep him safe. The reality of him facing Nasume alone tears us apart.”
“Alone?” Auslin repeated, his brow furrowing. “But you’ll be there. You said he would fight alongside you.”
Kitsuki hesitated, then sighed. “Kizoshi was specific in her instructions. Maseo must face his father alone. It is his battle to fight, his fate to fulfill.”
“And your dragon hates that,” Auslin guessed, sensing the tension in Kitsuki’s frame.
“He rages against it,” Kitsuki confirmed. “We want to defy fate, to kill Nasume ourselves, and spare Maseo the risk. The conflict is difficult to manage.”
“That’s why you insisted we can’t talk to him about how we feel until after you return from Kunushi.”
“Yes,” Kitsuki replied, relieved that Auslin understood without further explanation. “He must face Nasume with a clear mind, focused on his own path. If we burden him with our confusion and unresolved feelings…”
“It would only complicate things for him,” Auslin finished. “We can’t make him question himself when he needs certainty the most.”
Kitsuki shifted positions, earning a whimper of pleasure from his mate as it rocked the knot inside him. “After the war, when he has faced his father and found his own resolution, thenperhaps we can explore what this means. What we all mean to each other.”
“For what it’s worth, the way he reacted to my heat scent makes me think he would share our interest.” Auslin sighed, a shadow of worry crossing his face. “I understand why it’s the right decision, but it doesn’t make it any easier to watch him march off to war, knowing he’ll face such danger.”
Kitsuki agreed, but it pained him to admit. “Allowing him to walk into danger when every instinct screams at me to protect him is a struggle.”
“Like you protect me.”
“It is why I cannot risk having you there,” Kitsuki explained. “Sending him into battle is hard enough. If both of you were on the front lines, I could not fight the way I must.”
Auslin’s expression turned thoughtful. “Maybe this is meant to teach us to trust in his strength and our own.”
“Perhaps. My dragon has always been possessive and protective. Learning to let go is difficult.”
“No, but Maseo is stronger than anyone gives him credit for. He survived his father’s cruelty for years. He’ll survive this battle, too.”
