Page 28 of Right Side of Paradise
“Is this what we’re gonna do all summer?” I asked when she was facing me again. “Trade apologies for hurting each other’s feelings?”
“No.” It was one word, but I swore I heard every bit of hurt she felt wrapped up in that one syllable.
I wasn’t expecting that, and it killed my playful mood in a heartbeat.
“Harlow, what’s wrong?”
“I don’t think I can stay here.” She swiped a hand over her nose and avoided my eyes.
Just a day ago I was having the same thoughts when Rico told me she was here all summer. So, it was crazy when my stomach dropped as if she was breaking up with me.
“I hate myself for even admitting this, but I’m jealous. Too jealous to stay here. Especially if Rico’s gonna act like that after everything I tell him.”
The microwave beeped, cutting off my retort but I slanted my head to look at her anyway. There was no way in hell I’d heard her correctly.
Harlow? Jealous?
She grabbed the last hamburger bun we had and started assembling her burger.
“Harlow, what? What the hell do you have to be jealous about?”
She licked the back of the spoon she used to spread ketchup on her bread and let her stare lock on mine. “I can’t explain it without getting in my head.”
“Just try. I’m listening.” I didn’t care that I sounded desperate. I was and I didn’t want her to look at me like she was, her eyes wide and full of doubt.
Harlow walked over and sat on the stool beside me.
“It doesn’t make sense. I shouldn’t envy my best friends for being happy and having each other, but I do. And that’s fucked up.” She toyed with her fork. “I know life keeps going and I chose to be away, but it hit me harder than I expected. Y’all look so happy. Not disjointed. You don’t have to get reacquainted with either of them because you never left. This is your everyday life and I’m very aware I’m not a part of it.”
Silence fell over the kitchen and she finished the last of her plate.
I kept my mouth shut, trying to figure out what to say. But I was still drawing blanks when she went on.
“Fuck,” she groaned, rubbing her forehead. “Maybe those two drinks were stronger than I thought.”
I snickered, placing a hand on her back.
“Why does Rico get to fuck who he wants but I can’t?”
“That’s a question for Rico,” I said. Keeping my voice nonchalant was about to give me a damn migraine.
“I swear sometimes he still treats me like that seven-year-old he met when our parents first got married.”
“Trust me when I tell you that’s not why he’s so protective of you.”
“Then why?”
Hiding my face in my hands, I blew out the deepest breath I could and asked, “Do you remember your twenty-first birthday?”
Her voice gentled. “Of course I do. It was one of the best nights of my life.”
Clearing my throat, I studied the side of her face. “I think he stopped seeing you as a sister that night.”
“Then why act like this?”
“Harlow, come on now. Be real.”
She finally looked at me again and paused. “What?”
