Page 25 of Where There's Smoke…
I almost fold right then as she pouts cutely, her hands moving down my body until they sit on my hips. Ugh, I would give her anything, just like I knew she’d give me anything. It was hard to resist her, and the longer we were around each other, the less likely I wanted to. Seeing how excited she was about finally going fishing made me nod and agree to tag along. She was right, though. It was time for me to experience some of her hobbies, and as nervous as I was, I was also low-key excited.
So, I let her lead me out to the boat that sat a couple of yards away, tied to the dock. It was bigger than I expected and even had a motor. As she helped me into a life vest, I looked around at how spacious the boat was. There was a seat for the driver and a cushioned bench about a foot or two behind it. There were even a few stairs leading down to a door. When I asked her what it was, she said it was where the bedroom and bathroom were. Was this a mini-yacht or something?
Yeah, I don’t know much about boats…
Once we’re settled into the boat and she has all of the gear packed in, we head off toward some fishing spot that she said she and her granddad used to frequent. The lake leads out into a river surrounded by trees on either side. The scenery is so beautiful, and I feel a sense of calm wash over me.
As we’re cruising, I let myself relax. These past few days have been great for me mentally. After that surprise pop-up visit from Nate, I thought that my whole week was gonna be ruined. However, Phoenix jumped in when she saw how distraught I was and took me out of that situation.
My mind drifts over to Nate, and I sigh.
He and I had known each other since we were kids, since he was good friends with Chris and Orion. He’d hang around a lot, and in turn, I got close to him, too. Contrary to what people may believe, our friendship was never the one where the little sister fell for the brother’s friend. No, I’ve never been attracted to him like that.
Why did I sleep with him then?
Well, I’d never had much luck in the relationship department. I mean, I’m naturally an extrovert and, not to brag, but I knew I was pretty. It’s just that I was also awkward as hell, and none of the women I’d crushed on until that point even gave me a second glance. Maybe I wasn’t their type or didn’t give off woman-lover vibes. I don’t know. All I knew was that I was twenty-two, had never been in a relationship, and had never slept with anyone. Never even experienced heartbreak.
That was also around the time that I was struggling with my sexuality.
I know now that I shouldn’t have felt like this, but I was embarrassed to be a late bloomer. All of my friends from the culinary school I had attended were well-versed in relationships, but when we satand talked about our experiences, I could never add anything, because I had none. I felt lonely, but Nate was there to cheer me up.
I could always talk to him about shit I couldn’t speak to my brothers about, and I trusted him. When I explained how I felt about being inexperienced, he listened without judgment. When I finally worked up the courage to ask him to be my first, he hesitated, telling me to think about what I was asking and then let him know if I was sure. I was, and after a week, I told him as much.
Then it happened, and it wasn’t bad, but it left me feeling empty…figuratively. I realized then that the universe loved a good joke because, of course, I’d be the one to get pregnant after their first time. Yes, we used protection. Still, obviously, we happened to be amongst the small percentage where it wasn’t effective.
I was miserable and scared, but his feelings didn’t mirror mine. I mean, yes, he was initially afraid and didn’t even talk to me for a week after I told him. Then he returned with a whole new attitude, insisting that he was ready to be a dad, and apologizing for leaving me distraught. I told him thathemight be ready, butIwasn’t. I told him that I never wanted to carry a child because the thought of it terrified me. And then there was the fact that he left me to cry for hours alone.
He was taken aback by how much I was against going through with the pregnancy and practically begged me to bless him with this one child. I couldn’t do it and told him as such. The day after I went through with the termination, he messaged me saying that he was moving away because it was too hard to be where I was. That was the last time I’d seen him until a few days ago. Seeing him again caughtme completely off guard, and I was instantly filled with so many intense emotions, from sadness to anger to disgust to hurt. Even though Nate apologized for how he’d acted, I still couldn’t stop myself from shutting down. I was quickly overwhelmed and so glad when Phoenix took me from the scene.
“You’re really quiet back there,” I hear Phoenix say, and my head snaps up to see her slowing down the boat. She cuts the engine and then turns to face me. “Penny for your thoughts?”
“I’m good,” I assure her with a smile. She doesn’t say anything as she stares at me, no doubt trying to figure out if I was telling the truth. I pat her arm lightly. “I promise, Phee.”
“Okay, Sweets,” she sighs, leaning in to kiss me. “Let me put this anchor down, and then we can start. I also packed some snacks for us. If we stay out here as long as I’d like, I can order dinner for us too.”
“Wait, order us dinner?” I ask, eyebrows furrowed. She nods. “And they’ll deliver it to us way out here?”
“Yeah,” she chuckles with a nod before pressing a button. I hear a mechanical sound, and then a splash comes from under the boat. She pressed a different button, and I felt a sudden jerk that had me gripping the edge of the boat. She chuckles once more and walks over to sit beside me. “That was just the anchor dropping. We’re good now.” I nod. “And as for the food, there’s a riverside restaurant a few miles east. They make a pretty penny doing deliveries on the water. They’re pretty good too. The best seafood restaurant I’ve ever had.”
“Wait, so let me get this straight,” I say, trying to put it together. She nods. “We came fishing, but we aren’t gonna eat any of the fish? Instead, we’re gonna order fish from someone else?” She nods again. “What’s the point of fishing then?”
This gets a genuine laugh out of her, and I’m even more confused. “Baby, the point of fishing, at least how I was taught, is just to be one with nature,” she explains. “When I was younger, I asked my Granddad the same question after we’d caught fish and then let them go. He said that the main thing he wanted me to learn from fishing was patience. You see, this isn’t something that can be rushed. If you move too fast, you scare the fish away. Nah, you have to take your time.”
“Okay, but that doesn’t explain why you don’t keep the fish,” I point out.
“That’s simple,” she states, picking up one of the poles and a spool of translucent string. “I just don’t want to. I mean, yeah, he taught me how to descale, debone, and filet fish, but eh.” She shrugs as she begins to unwind the string. “The thrill is in the catch. I’d rather have other people do all the other stuff. Besides, I’m very picky about my seafood. Believe it or not, aside from shellfish, I really only eat catfish, and there’s a specific spot you have to go to get them suckers. This ain’t it.”
I sat back and nodded as I watched her in her element. I wasn’t sure exactly what she was doing, but she’d run the string along the pole in record time. She had a small kit of tools, and she used some to fasten the string to the pole. I watched in awe as she cut and tied as ifit were second nature to her. When I asked what she was doing, she told me she was making a fishing pole for me.
There must’ve been genuine shock on my face because she laughed lightly before explaining what she was doing. I felt like I was getting a VIP fishing experience as she showed me what each part was and then taught me how to hold it. She even showed me the correct way to cast it and reel it in. I was getting excited by the second because never in a million years did I think I’d do something like this.
“Thank you,” I say once our poles are set up on these little stand thingies. The hooks were dropped into the water, and we were waiting for a bite. She smiled before pulling me into her arms and asking why I was thanking her. “For sharing your hobby with me. You always get me out of my comfort zone, and I appreciate it. Also, I love getting to experience the things that make you…you. You tend to radiate genuine joy when you show me stuff you like, and I love seeing it.”
“And that’s exactly how I feel when you show me stuff you’re into,” she tells me. Her lips connect with mine, and I melt instantly. My heart thumped as a contented feeling traveled through me. She pulled back to look down at me. “I have no idea what I did in my past life, but I must’ve saved a village or something to be rewarded with someone as amazing as you.”
“Don’t boost my head up now,” I joke. I could feel my cheeks growing warm as I averted my eyes. She lightly gripped my chin and turned my face back to look at her. I almost gasped at the intense look in her eyes.
“Angel, I’m falling for you…hard,” she admits, stealing any words I had left in my brain. All I could do was stare at her. “I know it’s probably too early to say those three words, but I need you to know that my feelings for you are deep as fuck. You make me feel like I’m floating whenever I’m around you. When I’m not, you’re all I can think about. I love your quirkiness. I love how fucking cute you are. Hell, I love how spoiled you are.”
