Page 95 of A Fate of Blood and Magic
Everly let out an audible hiss that drew our attention. “I’m sorry,” she said quickly.
The way she apologized, the way she shot glances at Bon and Koa made me uneasy. At some point, this prejudice against the other fae had to stop.
“I think what Elias is proposing is incredible and maybe one day, lirio and nyxx can . . . Koa, Bon, I don’t mean anydisrespect.” Everly shook her head while her nerves danced behind her eyes. “I like you and would like to call you friends. It’s—for years, we’ve fought fae who looked like you, and maybe we even fought you, Koa. I have nightmares of friends I grew up beside being turned to ice by nyxx only to be thrown to the ground where they would shatter.” She pushed her hands between her bouncing knees. “I have nightmares of a lirio tearing another friend apart and another having her head ripped off. These nightmares and the battles we’ve waged against each other aren’t any of our faults. I understand Leanora had a hold over your minds and that your actions weren’t your own. But the nightmares remain and . . . I don’t know. I have the same wish as Elias, but . . .”
I wondered if Elias felt the same way or if seeing the lirio brought on the same torment. Had I been selfish in bringing the lirio into our lives? I’d only thought of Alastor and his people rather than Elias and the fae friends I’d made.
“In due time,” Alastor said. “Who knows, maybe some of your people may wish to move to the mage lands? The living book my brother, sister, and I read from said our land was once beautiful. The book gifted Leanora visions of it, but I never got to see it.”
“Leanora showed me,” I told him. “I think I could show you as well.”
“I’d like that,” he said. “I’d like to have the mage lands as well. You have my thanks, Elias.”
“If I may?” Koa asked, looking at Everly for permission. “I understand your trepidation of us. Under Leanora’s control, we did unspeakable acts that we can never atone for. I’m sorry we killed your friends, just as I’m sorry your warriors have killed mine.”
“When Leonora took hold of my mind, I felt trapped butfree,” Elias said when Koa finished. “It was as if suddenly all the lies had been revealed, and I felt absolute, like her will was mine and nothing else mattered,” Elias said. “All I wanted was to please her.”
I remembered that day. How Elias had seemed more animalistic and methodical in the way he approached and sniffed me. While it’d originally scared me, the bond that tied us together urged me to have him drink from me. It was all he’d needed to return to me.
“There is no punishment greater than what Leonora did to us,” Bon said. While her words came out confident, I heard the sadness that bled from behind them. “It’s like Elias said. Her will was ours. It wasn’t until Alastor freed us of his hold that I found out Koa was my soul-bound mate. We’ve been together for years, but we’re getting to know each other for the first time.” The way she dipped her head down made her look youthful, almost hopeful. “I knew he was there. I knew we had children together, but I couldn’t care about them—she wouldn’t allow me to care about them.”
My heart broke for them all, for the life they’d been forced to live. They had their freedom now, but it didn’t seem like enough. Yet they chose kindness, family, and loyalty.
No doubt Everly was right in how she felt. If the lirio or nyxx even thought to consider living in Niev, the fae wouldn’t accept them. Hell, too often, I wondered how or why they’d accepted us. And whether that acceptance would survive the betrayal my kind continued to inflict. Maybe tomorrow would help, when we reached the dragons’ caves in the highest mountains in Niev to meet with the shifters and the dragons. Only time would tell.
Chapter
Nineteen
ELIAS
As we traveled to the dragons’cave, a storm hit us unexpectedly, making the biting wind howl as it seemed to scrape across my face. The freshly fallen snow covered my black boots as quickly as it hid our trailing footprints.
Frustration marred the faces of those around me, and it was hard to listen to the panting breaths of those who struggled to make it up our tallest mountain.
Once at the clearing, Brenton and Alastor built a few fires, and each invited a human to huddle around. Teddy stayed by my side, though, with her gloved hands tucked into the front pockets of her pants.
When she shuddered against the cold, I placed my hand on her lower back to lead her to the fire that Donnie, Ryenne, and Nate stood around. I hadn’t expected to see Donnie this morning, but I shouldn’t have been surprised. Even in Colina, he’d taken on a leadership role and made sure to put himself in situations so he knew exactly what was going on and how he could help his people. This was no different.
Teddy didn’t have to speak nor did I have to look at herexpression to know she was worried. All night, it’d eaten at me that I’d caused this fracture in their bond. I hoped them coming meant it was possible to restore their long-standing friendship. Donnie shifted his weight from one foot to another, a look of uncertainty crossing his features before he gave Teddy a tight-lipped smile and looked away.
“You didn’t tell us it got this cold in Niev,” Ryenne said. Eyes wide, her attention bounced from Donnie to Teddy, who stared at the fire as if she expected it to consume her.
Guardians help me, I needed to make this right.
Brenton drew Teddy to his side, using his smoke magic to warm her.
“We rarely face these types of storms,” Brenton said. “I’d say whoever our gods are, they are upset with us.”
Or they were upset with me. Maybe they weren’t as ruthless as the Elders we once abided, and all the killing and vengeance had become too much for them.
“Maybe you take on blame that isn’t yours to accept,”Nalari said.“Donnie will either forgive you or he won’t. It matters not if he sees it as long as you know you did what you had to do to protect your family.”
I mulled over her words, letting them sink into my skin although a large part of me remained unsure.
“If your mate doesn’t hold this against you, why do you?”
“Because.”It wasn’t that I regretted my decision. I didn’t. Every one of those people who planned and plotted against my family and my people deserved a far worse death than what I granted them. It was more that I regretted how I handled Donnie. Had I been more patient, more willing to listen to what he’d said, maybe things would be different now.
