Page 91 of Yours to Lose

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Me

Fuck off. We are nowhere near there.

Ben

Sorry, I was channeling Asher for a second. I’m over it.

Me

I was serious when I said I miss you guys.

Ben

And we were serious when we said we miss you too. Hope we can see you soon.

Me

Me too.

* * *

Mom

JORDAN ALEXANDER WYLES, YOU DO NOT DECIDE TO BRING A GIRL HOME WITHOUT TELLING YOUR MOTHER.

Me

Jesus Christ, Mom, I haven’t even asked her yet.

Mom

Well, what’s taking you so long?

Me

This is new. Like, brand new.

Mom

I know you, baby. You wouldn’t be taking this step if she wasn’t special. And girls who are special to you really should meet your mother.

Me

Fine. Fuck. She’s special, okay?

Mom

Definitely okay. Now, bring her to me. She’s what I want for my birthday.

Me

I’ll ask her, but can you be a little less, like, you if we come?

Mom

Jordan, I have been me for almost fifty-six years, and I will be exactly who I am until the day you put me in the ground. I make myself less for no one.

Me

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