Page 76 of It's Always Been You
I chuckle. “The good thing about a second chance is that we’re older and know how to put snacks in a more sophisticated receptacle.”
She laughs, shivering a little in the cool Northern California night air. I smile, because it’s comforting that so much of her is still so predictable to me. Just like I’ve done a million times before, the first thing I pull out is a sweatshirt I toss to her to pull over her dress.
She looks down at the navy blue Berkeley sweatshirt with the gold writing and then back up at me, her face full of humor. She remembers too. “You brought me one of your sweatshirts.”
I grin at her, loving life. “It’s almost midnight, and it’s northern California. I knew you would wear a dress, and I knew you would be cold. You always wore a dress, no matter how many times you froze your ass off out here.”
She tugs the sweatshirt over her head, pulling her mass of curls out of the neck, and something about the familiar motion, seeing her in my clothes, has possession humming in my blood.
Mine.
“You know I never brought sweatshirts on purpose, right?”
“Seriously?”
She gives me a look like I’m being ridiculous. “Gabe, come on. I’m chaotic a lot of the time and pretty disorganized, but I’m very smart, and I can definitely remember to bring a sweatshirt to sit outside in Northern California in the middle of the night. I never brought a sweatshirt because you always brought one for me, and I liked that you did that. They were cozy, and they smelled like you. You’re not getting this one back, by the way. It’s mine now.”
I laugh because god, I love her so much. “I love that even though we knew each other so well, I can still learn new things about you.”
Molly tosses her hair over her shoulder and leans back on her hands, stretching her legs out in front of her. I lift up her legs and put them in my lap, getting a flash of black lace under her dress and holy fucking shit. Her penchant for fancy underwear kills me every single time. I blow out a breath, and when I look up, she’s smirking at me. She points a toe like the former ballerina she is, grazing it over my now hard cock, and laughs when I groan. “You just saw my underwear, didn’t you?”
I run a hand up her leg, loving her little shiver. “You know it. As long as I’m still breathing, your underwear is going to make me hard. That’s just facts.”
“Well, keep it in your pants. You were inside me, like, two hours ago. Snacks first.”
“Rory baby, I could be inside you every minute of every day, and it would still never be enough, but snacks first.”
I reach back into the picnic basket and take out a couple of wrapped sandwiches, tossing one to her. She inspects it and snorts a laugh.
“Peanut butter and jelly? You really did go for nostalgia tonight.”
I shrug. “It was our favorite then, and it’s still my favorite now.”
Molly grins at me. “Mine too. I kind of forgot about them for a while, but they came back into my life full force at the end of last year when Maddy came to live with Emma.”
I toss Molly a bag of barbeque potato chips and pull out Reese’s Pieces and black licorice, Double Stuf Oreos with a jar of peanut butter for dipping, and a bag of popcorn.
“It’s nice how close you all are to Maddy.”
Molly looks down at all the snacks and laughs again. “I think full nostalgia was exactly right.” She bites into her sandwich and chews thoughtfully.
“Em applied to be a foster parent, and when Maddy came to live with her, we all pitched in. She and I have a special relationship though. I live next door, so I was around a lot in the early days. I did big stuff like taking her shopping and to the mall to get her ears pierced. We both love pink and sparkles, and Emma would rather be dead than set foot in a mall, so it worked out well.” Molly smiles, and her love for both Emma and Maddy just shines.
“I also did everyday things. Like go over in the morning and have coffee with Emma, help her with all the morning stuff that comes with a kid—getting dressed, fighting over brushing teeth, and waiting for the bus. I got to know Maddy and had a front row seat to watch Emma and Jeremy finally becomeEmma and Jeremyand then watch the three of them become a family. She’s our first kid, so it’s been special for all of us.”
I like the way she saysour first kid. Maddy might be Emma and Jeremy’s, but where it really counts, she belongs to their whole group. I flip open the cooler and grab a can of Diet Pepsi, then reach back into the picnic basket for a thermos. I hand both to Molly. “There’s a peppermint mocha in the thermos.”
“Gabriel Sullivan, I am the heart eyes emoji personified right now. You’re perfect.” She opens the thermos and takes a sip of the hot drink, handing it back to me to share.
“Not perfect, but definitely perfect for you.” I toss her a wink.
“You definitely are that,” she says, tearing open the chips.
“Do you want kids of your own?” It was the one thing we never really talked about in college. We were so young, and things like marriage and kids seemed a million miles away. I study Molly to see if my abrupt question freaked her out, but she only looks thoughtful.
“Honestly, it wasn’t something I gave much thought to. When we were together, I always assumed we would get to all those things at some point. And then when we weren’t, I couldn’timagine doing them with someone else. But now…” She trails off, studying me. “I think I would be a fun mom. An interesting one. A little unconventional, maybe, but never boring. So yeah, I think I would like to have kids. I think I would like to have kids with you. Only with you. I think I want everything with you.”
I want to grab her and kiss her until the world disappears around us. Make her understand how much her words mean to me, how much I want the same thing she does. But more than I want to do that, I want to keep talking. I want every thought in her head, and I want to give her all of mine. So, instead of laying my lips on hers, I squeeze her leg and say, “I want everything with you, too.”
