Page 135 of Ink and Ashes
My self-deprecating thoughts are interrupted when I hear, “Hi, baby,” over a knock on my bedroom door. I look over my shoulder through the mirror’s reflection to see Holland standing in the doorway wearing an emerald green satin dress that fits her like a glove. It’s lacey up top with the skirt ending mid-calf, and she’s paired it with simple gold heels. Her fiery locks fall in waves around her shoulders, and her makeup is soft but precise.
She looks absolutely elegant.
I clench my jaw tight as she makes her way over to me, trying—and failing—to focus on tying my tie. When I feel her warm body press against mine, I have to fight to keep myself from stripping her bare and fucking her right here, right now.
But I can’t do that, or we’ll be late. And this is one thing Holland refuses to let me miss.
“You look incredible,” is all I’m able to get out as I turn toward her, unable to tear my gaze away. She huffs a small laugh as she takes my tie in her slender fingers, finishing the task for me. I rest my hands on her hips, keeping my eyes locked on her.
“You’re not so bad yourself, Lieutenant.” She tightens the tie, then brushes her hands over my shoulders as her eyes finally meet mine. “Or should I sayChief?”
I drop my shoulders. “You might be the only person who will ever call me that.”
She pouts. “If you think the town isn’t appointing you, you’re crazy. They’re giving you a medal of valour. You really think they would do that then not choose you?”
I shake my head. “I don’t know. I want to be chief, but I would understand if they go in another direction. The station may be run by my family, but that doesn’t mean we get all the say in the hiring. At the end of the day, it’s a majority vote from the whole town, and I’m not sure I’m the right person for the job. I’m not sure I ever was. I didn’t figure out it was Whitlock until it was almost too late, and then I intentionally left him inside to burn alive. That’s nothing to be proud of. That’s notchiefly.”
Her brows furrow. “Anyone else would’ve done the same thing to him—you know that. You can’t beat yourself up for not seeing it because no one else did either. Not even your father.” She takes a step closer. “And while the rest may be true, you also saved my life. You may have broken protocol in doing so, but I’m standing here because of you and you alone, Colson. That’s pretty damn commendable.”
She pushes up to press her lips to mine, and I smile against them. My hands find their way to the small of her back as she rests her arms over my shoulders.
“I didn’t have a choice. I think I would’ve died on the spot if you hadn’t made it,” I tease as I pull away from the kiss, though I’m not lying in the slightest. If she hadn’t made it, I wouldn’t have wanted to live to see another day.
She pouts. “But then I wouldn’t have been able to haunt you.”
I laugh again. “No, but at least we’d still be together.” I press a kiss to her forehead. “How’s your article coming along?” I ask, trying to delay leaving for as long as I can.
She fidgets with my tie again as she says, “I finished it.”
I grin. Holland has spent every day since the fire working on an article about the investigation, but the last time we spoke, she hadn’t decided what to do with it. She’s been reminding me every day over the past few weeks that she’s not going anywhere, but it’s hard for me to believe her when she has yet to fully cut ties with her old life. This article has been the only thing standing in the way of that. Her original plan was always for her to take the story back to the Foundation, and though I haven’t said it out loud, I still have a feeling that she will.
And that if she does, she won’t come back to me.
“I’m so proud of you,” I tell her, pushing my anxieties down and pressing a soft kiss on the crown of her head. Then I inhale deeply as I brave myself to ask my next question. “Have you figured out what you’re going to do with it?”
She nods. “I’m going to self-publish.”
My brows pull together. In all the times we’ve spoken about it, that was never something that came up.
“Really?” I ask. “What made you decide to do that?”
“You did.” She shrugs. “You’ve given me strength and helped me realize that what I really want is to do things for myself from now on. That means taking control and writing what I want to write. If I send this off to another organization, it’s going to have their name on it, and they’re going to pull the strings. But it’s my story; the only name I want on it is Holland Rhodes.”
My eyes widen. “You’re publishing as Holland?”
She laughs. “That surprises you?”
I shrug, nodding. “A little. I guess I hadn’t given it much thought.”
“Well, I didn’t need to. I hold nothing but resentment and regret toward Hollis Rothwell, and no one here knows me as that anyway. Holland Rhodes is who I was always meant to be.”
I smile, my heart surging at her words. “What are you gonna do after then?” I ask, curious about if she has plans to find more stories. I can’t imagine life without her in it, but I’m also not going to be the one to hold her back from chasing her dreams.
“I’ll probably keep freelancing, but I’m not sure yet. And honestly, I’m not really worried about it. Not now that I’m dating the fire chief.”
I huff a laugh as she grins up at me. I tangle my fingers in her hair as she holds my gaze, but as I stare into her deep brown eyes, a wave of sadness washes over me and I glance down at the floor.
“What’s wrong?” She shifts so she’s in my line of sight. “This is good news.”
