Page 90 of Ink and Ashes
“You’re okay,” she whispers, placing a soft kiss on the crown of my head. “You’re safe. You’re okay.”
I focus on her words as she repeats them over and over until they start to sink in. I’m far from okay, but being here with her, I feel better than I did before.
I take a few deep breaths, and on the last exhale, I brave a glance up at her. Her eyes shine with unshed tears and a sad smile dusts her lips. She rests her hand on my cheek as she holds my gaze, and I take advantage of the kind gesture and lean into it.
I open my mouth to speak, but before I can get a word out, she says, “Don’t you dare apologize.”
The firm demand is a shift from the gentle tone she was using a moment ago, and I can’t help but crack a smile over it.
“Okay,” I say simply, feeling like a bit of a weight has been lifted. I’m not usually one for crying, but this is all hitting me really fucking hard. “What are we going to do, Rhodes? How are we going to catch this guy?”
Her thumb grazes just below my eye as she holds my gaze a moment longer, then she stands and holds a hand out to me. “First, we’re going to find that candle evidence,” she starts as I take her hand, and she pulls me to my feet. “Then, I’m going to go to every place in town where candles can be bought while you go visit Ollie. At the very least we know he’s using pillar candles,because the only remnants that have been left are the tabs. That will help narrow the search some.”
I release a sigh and begin to walk away to search again, but Holland stops me. With her hand on my arm, she looks me in the eyes and adds, “It’s not going to be easy, but wewillcatch this guy, Colson. I promise you.”
I swallow roughly. “Okay,” I say easily, because trusting her has become like second nature to me. With her intelligence and determination, I’msure she’s right. I’m sure we will catch him.
I just hope no one else gets caught in the crossfire while we do.
CHAPTER 32
Holland
The next few days pass by in a blur. Colson has barely been at the inn, splitting most of his time between the station, the hospital, and helping Finn’s family plan his service. Even when I have seen him, there’s been an air of awkwardness between us.
Since that kiss—the one I haven’t been able to stop thinking about—and Colson’s breakdown that day at the church, we’ve both been walking on eggshells around each other. Both of us are desperate to let it happen again, but neither of us are willing to face the consequences of what will happen if we do. So we’ve been pretending like it doesn’t exist, even though we both know it does.
I’ve been in touch with Dom and Cass over the past few days, and both of them have conveyed concerns about Colson’s mental health. Knowing his history, I won’t lie and say I haven’t been worried about him too. I’ve been trying to keep a closer eye on him when I do see him, but it isn’t easy when he’s been keeping me at an arm’s length.
But even though I haven’t seen much of him, he has still been good about keeping me in the loop via text.He’s messaged me a few times each day, letting me know that he just needs some space right now, but if anything weird happens, he’s only a phone call away. He admitted that he’s having a hard time being around me, and that coupled with everything since Finn just has him too overwhelmed.
I get it, but I’m not going to lie and say I haven’t missed him this week.
But he’s also made sure to have Dom check on me more than usual, which has given me some peace of mind. He’s still going out of his way to protect me while also doing what he must to protect himself.
I know part of him is blaming himself for what happened. I think he might also be blaming me a little, since it was my actions that led to the arsonist being discovered. If the fires had gone undetected, there’s a strong chance Brian Finnegan would still be alive.
Which is why, for the past week, I’ve kept my head down, trying to focus all my attention on my research. Dom’s also been busy with everything post Finn’s death, so aside from the times he’s been by to check on me, I’ve been working on my own.
The day before the church fire happened, I also did speak with Liam again. He’d been on my radar since the beginning with how interested he is in the fires, but after what I learned from PD, I realized it can’t be him. He’s a total creep, but whoever’s behind these has studied fire for years and clearly has advanced technological experience. Unfortunately for all of us, Liam doesn’t fit either of those aspects.
The knowledge of fire is ultimately what convinced me we’re dealing with a firefighter. As sickening as it is to know that someone who has dedicated themselves to putting them out could also be the one causing them, it makes sense. This person is obsessed with fire, and since they’ve managed to fly under the radar for so many years, they obviously weren’t setting fires every day or even month. Which means they had to find that thrill elsewhere, and that’s when they decided to start fighting them too.
I wouldn’t even be surprised if once they became a firefighter,their urge to set fires settled some, since that thrill they were seeking was being replaced. But I doubt it lasted long. At some point, it would’ve gotten boring, and they picked right back up where they left off. But it was in a way that let them go undetected, at least until this year.
I don’t know what’s so special about this year. But considering the number of fires Ember Grove has fought already, it’s clear it’s significant to the arsonist, and so is this town.
The only possibility I’ve come across is that this year marks thirty years since Welland Ranch burned. But if it’s something related to that, I have no idea what. The whole family is dead. I suppose it’s possible that a friend of the family is trying to avenge them, but no one on the team was close to the Wellands. Half of them weren’t even born yet or were too young to remember, and quite a few didn’t live in Ember Grove at the time. Of the ones who could’ve known the family, I can’t find anything connecting them.
This whole thing is driving me crazy. Because on top of everything, my profile is no longer relevant. Knowing the arsonist intentionally harmed someone changes everything. I’ve basically had to start from scratch, and that means that save for the few who I’ve come to know well, any of those guys could be behind these.
I run a hand through my hair, then navigate to the fake email I’ve been using for tips. It’s the same one I posted on the forum when I first arrived in town, and while I’ve had plenty of people send me messages, none of it has been helpful. I still check it daily, hoping eventually, something useful will come through. But like every day since I posted it, today is not that day.
I let out a sigh, then pick up my phone to navigate to my text thread with Colson. The last text he sent is from yesterday, telling me he wouldn’t be home until late. I appreciated him letting me know, but considering I still haven’t seen him, I’m beginning to wonder whether he came home at all.
Needing a distraction from my thoughts of Colson and stressing over the fires, I grab my car keys and head out of myroom.
The one good thing that came from the past few days was getting the call from Jimmy saying my car is safe to drive again. Colson took me to pick it up on Monday, and since I no longer need his truck, I’ve seen him even less since then.
