Page 87 of Starstruck
So I did what I do best—I pushed him away. I made the tough decision to end things between us permanently.
I needed to learn to love myself again. I needed to stand on my own two feet for once in my life, because I’d never really done it before. And I couldn’t do that and be with him at the same time.
I missed him at first, but it helped knowing he was at least still alive and well, whereas my parents were not. I still stand by my reasons for ending things. I may be doing better than I was then,but I’m still not fully healed.
I’m not sure that I ever will be.
“Lennon?” Nathan’s eyes go wide as he takes me in. “Oh, my god, how are you?”
He releases my arms as we shuffle off to the side and out of the way of the other concert goers and crew members, my hand still wrapped around Sadie’s. I glance at her sheepishly before looking back to him.
He looks the same—his dirty-blond hair still buzzed short, donned in a black T-shirt and jeans like he always was.
“I’m okay,” I tell him, because it’s the truth. Things have been going better for me as of late, but I still wouldn’t qualify myself asgood.
“What are you doing here?” His brows pull together. “You’ve never been a fan of Baxter James.”
I bite my bottom lip as I huff a laugh, scanning the room while I try to think of an excuse. The last thing I need is for Nathan to find out I actually might be hisbiggestfan now.
Sadie seems to notice my hesitation, replacing her concerned look with a bright smile, and jumps in. “My brother is Baxter’s guitarist, and I invited Lennon to come with me.”
She holds her right hand—the one not grasped in mine—out to Nathan. He takes it with no hesitation, though confusion is clear in his face.
“I’m Sadie. I was signed to Revolution earlier this year, and Lennon and I have become good friends,” she lies easily, and I breathe a sigh of relief, squeezing her hand in a silentthank you.
Nate nods in understanding. “Ah, okay. I’m Nathan—Lennon’s ex-boyfriend.”
Sadie’s eyes widen slightly before she regains her composure. She’s clearly realizing how fucked up a situation this is.
Turning back to me, he smiles. His eyes scan my body before finding my face again. “You look good, Lennon. Happy.”
I smile softly, glancing at the floor before looking back up athim. “Thanks, Nate. So do you. How are you?”
He smiles, looking over my shoulder. I glance behind me, finding a beautiful woman with golden-blonde hair standing behind me, watching us.
My shoulders slump, relief coursing through me. Not that I thought he’d be pining after me—he’s a total catch, just not the one meant for me. But part of me did worry our breakup would hit him harder.
I look back to Nathan with a smirk on my face and my brows raised.
He meets my eyes, a blush rising in his cheeks, and smiles. “I’m good.” He glances at the woman again. “That’s Macy. She and I… We just… I mean?—”
“Nate, it’s okay.” I laugh. “It’s been almost eight months—you’re allowed to move on. In fact, I’m glad you have. I’m happy you’re happy.”
“Thanks, Lens.” He smiles again. “What’s new with you? Anyone special?” He gives me a knowing look, which causes me to blush.
As awkward as this would be for most people, it really isn’t for us. We were friends for way longer than we dated, and though I’ve been distant as of late, I’m glad we can still talk openly with each other, even after everything.
That doesn’t keep me from denying his question, though. Partly because my reasons for breaking up with him are still relevant, and also because I don’t want to admit that the person I’ve moved on with is the one he just watched perform.
So I shake my head. “No one relevant,” I lie. The truth is too scary. “But I am planning a benefit concert for my parents. I’m sure you’ve heard of it… No Strings Attached?”
His face lights up. “I have! I tried to get tickets, but they sold out so quickly. I didn’t know you were in charge, but I should’ve. It’s exactly what your parents would want. I’m proud of you. They would be, too.”
“Thanks, Nate.” I smile up at him. “I have some backstage passes left, and I can set two aside for you, if you want…” I offer, tossing a thumb behind me toward Macy.
He glances in that direction momentarily as he exclaims, “That would be amazing, Lens. Thank you. It really is good to see you.” He leans down, wrapping his arms around me.
I release Sadie’s hand from mine as I reach up to return the hug. “It’s good to see you, too, Nate.”
