Page 106 of Starstruck
This massive fucking secret that changes everything I thought I knew about him.
I spin around to face Baxter, tears beginning to stream down my face.
He stares back at me with a look of pure agony, and I almost feel bad for him. If I know anything about Baxter, and I’d like to think I do, it’s that whatever his reasoning is for keeping this from me, it wasn’t out of malice.
But that doesn’t change the fact that he’s the person closest to the reason my parents are dead. And he’s been lying to me about it for months.
“Tell me it isn’t true,” I beg, hoping this is all just a bad dream I’m going to wake up from.
He shakes his head, a flash of anguish crossing his face. He looks like a broken shell of the man I thought I knew.
“I can’t do that, Lennon.”
He pauses, his throat working as he looks anywhere but at me. And just when my world was finally starting to right itself, he says four words that flip it upside down all over again.
“Logan is my brother.”
[47 ]
BLOOD ON MY HANDS
BAXTER
“SORROWING MAN” BY CITY AND COLOUR
Amuffled gasp escapes Lennon’s lips.
“Y-you lied to me,” she whispers, her voice scratchy. I can tell she’s fighting the tears that threaten to fall, and it takes absolutely everything in me not to rush over and pull her into my arms.
All I want is to be the one to protect her, and instead, I’m the one she needs protectingfrom.
Say something, idiot. Tell her the truth.
“Lennon…” I rasp, letting my voice trail off.
I should be trying to explain myself, telling her why I’ve kept this secret for so long. That I haven’t had a relationship with Logan since my mother’s death, and I didn’t think dredging up the past I’ve tried so hard to forget would do either of us any good. Trying to convince her I’m not the bad guy she suddenly believes me to be.
But instead, the only thing I can possibly think of is the three little words I’ve been dying to say for weeks. Except I know if I say them now, it won’t be right. She’ll think I’m saying them just toget her to stay, and while that’s partially true, I need her to know they’reso much morethan that.
She stands there frozen, staring at me like I’m someone she doesn’t recognize instead of the man she’s bared her heart and soul to in the past few months. That look on her face rips my heart in two.
I gulp. “I didn’t lie to you, Lennon. I just…didn’t tell you.”
“That’s the same fucking thing, Baxter!” she shouts, her voice cracking as she says my name and tears spilling over her waterline. “A lie by omission is still alie.”
She’s right. And I should’ve told her from the beginning. I knew this day would come eventually, and I thought I had prepared myself for it. But just like I’ve struggled to find the words for months, I don’t know what I can say to her to make her understand. I’ve never felt the need to explain myself before, so I have no fucking idea what to do here.
“Trouble—”
“Don’t!” she grits out. “Don’t you fuckingdarecall me that. I amnotyour Trouble. Not anymore.”
My jaw works as I fight the words dying to fall from my lips.
“Do you have anything to say for yourself?!” she cries, and my heart splits wide open.
“I didn’t…I couldn’t—” I stammer, but she cuts me off before I can say anything more, which is probably for the best.
She shakes her head, looking me up and down. “I don’t even know who you are right now.”
