Page 80 of Kissed By the Alien
“I can see wanting to go to a larger city. Being stuck in the middle of nowhere must be lonely. I think I might have done the same.”
“That is because you, my sholani, are addicted to danger.”
I smile. “Hardly. But I need to be useful.”
Lutan sighs at this. “I think this is what Narzan felt as well. When I found out he was involved with the Brotherhood, I confronted him. He yelled at me that I left to be a warrior and I had no right to tell him how to live.”
“Sounds like you’d become more of a father to him than a brother.”
“This is why he refused to listen to me. Then he disappeared again for a few years. I could have tracked him down, but he needed his freedom.” Lutan’s fingers trace over my cheeks. “As do you, Lexi.”
I place my hand over his. He needs to tell his truth, confront the demons he’s locked away. “Go on, please. I want to hear it all.”
“You will not like what I tell you about me.”
“It won’t change how I feel.”
With a skeptical nod, he continues. “My brother reappeared, just as I was about to leave on a mission. He begged to go with me, so we’d have time during the flight to talk. He said he was in trouble and needed me. Instead of listening to my instincts to leave him behind, I thought it might be my only chance to pull him away from the Brotherhood and maybe undo the damage they’d done to him.”
“How long was the journey?”
“A week. Narzan told me everything. About how he’d worked for the Brotherhood, committed crimes on their behalf. Theft, kidnapping…” Lutan pauses and gauges my reaction, maybe because of what I went through yesterday.
“Did he kill anyone?”
“Fortunately, no. But he realized they were using him. They wanted him to plant an explosive in a government building. Security’s too tight after attacks a few years ago. He would have to assemble the components and set it off while inside. A suicide mission.”
“I’m guessing he wanted your help getting out of the Brotherhood.”
“No, he’d done that already. He wanted to become a warrior. Like me. And our father.”
“How could he?—”
Lutan shakes his head. “He couldn’t. Not after everything he’d done. Eeshone can become warriors. There’s one well-known, well-respected warrior who’s eeshone. Havok. But Narzan lacked not only the skills, but the heart of a warrior. And that’s where I failed him.”
“You were a child raising a child, Lutan. You cannot blame yourself, especially when you were up against a group like the Brotherhood. They look for loners, people who are desperate to fit in.”
“That was Narzan. He sought acceptance above all else. When I told him he would never be allowed to train at Izoran, he locked himself in my cabin for the rest of the journey to Karthika. I remember my last words to him onboardTheSeeker. I said I’d return within two or three days, and then we’d figure out his path, together.”
Lutan stops talking for a moment, his eyes staring past me. When I entwine my fingers in his, he flashes a quick smile, acknowledging my presence.
“Let it out, Lutan. Whatever it is.”
With a nod, he continues. “Karthika is a world with no rules, no government, just a lot of people and anarchy. I left my ship to track down a male with information on the Coalition. They’ve left Earth, but they are still a significant threat to my world and many others, especially now that they’ve ceased fighting with the Grud.
“I found the informant and was meeting with him when I received a message.” Lutan raises his comm. “Narzan said he had a plan. He had the name of a contact on Karthika. If he found the male and bought information that would be useful to the ZDC—that’s Zyan’s Defense Command—he could prove his loyalty to Zyan and that would gain him entry to warrior training.”
“It sounds like he was really determined. Desperate even.”
“I didn’t realize just how determined he was. I tried telling him not to go, that it wouldn’t work. I thought that would be the end of it. I was distracted by the informant I was with, so my messages to Narzan were curt, like our father. Narzan could usually be reasoned with, but it always took time, time I didn’t have at that moment. I gave in and said I’d meet him and then we’d go together. He set the time and place to meet.”
“Did he go without you?”
“I believe he waited. But I was late. He wasn’t at our meeting spot. I said we’d go together. He must have thought I was lying. I was too preoccupied with my mission to listen to what I was hearing in his voice.” Lutan swallows hard. “I found him not far away, stabbed in an alley, lying in a pool of his own blood.”
I pull him against me. “It wasn’t your fault. Narzan didn’t listen to what you told him.”
“I was the one who didn’t listen. He’d been telling me for a long time he wanted to fit in. He was desperate to, Lexi. If I’d truly listened, then he never would have taken that risk. He was trying to prove his worth to me and to anyone who would care to pay attention.”
