Page 44 of Freedom Mine
How could she tell Jace she had feelings for Kayo especially when Kayo didn’t want her. By Kerak’s Teeth, the manownedher. The fact that Kayo had been a slave helped put her at ease, but it really didn’t change much. She needed time to think, and being around Kayo clouded her mind. She’d caught herself mentally stripping him more than once. And then last night, here in the kitchen. . .
She still didn’t know what to make of what had happened. From the moment he’d placed his hand on hers to show her the proper technique for cutting an onion, she found herself leaning into him. Then he’d surrounded her with his body as if shielding her from the outside world. She’d felt so safe and protected, enjoying the tiny shivers from where his lips had grazed her ear and the way his hands had held hers, strong and firm. And gentle, oh so gentle. It was as if he wouldn’t let anything or anyone harm her ever again. And yet he had turned away from her.
“Be ready on time,” Jace said, before letting the door slam shut behind him.
Her nerves were at an all-time high as she walked down the long hallway to Kayo’s room. Would he still be sleeping or awake and caught up in memories again?
Slowly, she opened the door to his bedroom. He was lying on his back, asleep. She lightly caressed the fine stubble of his cheek and jaw. His beard was unexpectedly soft, contrasting the hard line of his jaw, as much a contradiction as Kayo himself.
Even asleep, he held a power over her she did not understand, and one he refused to use. The same power that had lifted her last night, teasing her with pleasure she’d never known before. She couldn’t forget the feel of his lips on her mouth, his tongue gently finding its way past her lips, her defenses lowering as he tasted her, and she followed his moves, stroke for stroke, learning what it meant to open herself to another, to trust for the first time.
His kiss had been tender, slow, caring. . . not the mashing of mouths and tongues forcing their way into her mouth that she’d experienced from her owners. Kayo was nothing like them. He owned her on paper, nothing more. She’d been telling herself that almost as often as Kayo had, but she had never fully believed it, until now.
“You walked away from me, Kayo,” she whispered. “Owners don’t walk away. They take what they want, when they want.” Her finger glided over his lips. Since the day he had bought her, he’d had many chances to take what he wanted. Kayo walked awaybecausehe cared about her. The idea was overwhelming.
“Alli?”
She crawled onto the bed, beside him and laid her head against his chest. “I’m here, Kayo.”
“Amm cavik,” he said, sounding groggy. His arm encircled her, and drew her close.
She stroked the fine hairs of his chest until he settled down again. “Maybe you’ll tell me one day, Kayo. Explain why you bought me, only to push me away.”
* * *
KAYO
“How bad was it?” Kayo asked Jace as they loaded supplies onto the harkifas headed to Freedom Mine. They’d been loading for a good ten minutes before Kayo forced himself to talk.
“Bad enough.”
“Was Alli there, or did I imagine that?”
“You held a knife to her.”
Kayo nearly dropped the drills on his foot. His eyes darted toward the house. “Is she okay? Did I hurt her?”
“She was shaken, but she’s fine. She was more concerned about you than anything. I explained it to her.”
Kayo gritted his teeth. He couldn’t get mad at Jace. None of this was his doing, and he’d be lost without him. “What exactly did you say to her?”
“Not much. Memories from the War. Where we’re from. How the nightmares aren’t new.”
He could have sworn she had been with him in the middle of the night, but he must have been dreaming of her again. He woke up, smelling her scent. He could have sworn his sheets smelled of her, but he was alone. It had been a dream, his subconscious telling him what he’d known for a long time. He wanted her, but he could never have her.
“You didn’t tell her about my past, did you?”
“Only that you served. Nothing more.”
Kayo nodded, thanking him for his discretion. He had thought the nightmares were behind him. “I shouldn’t have stopped drinking.”
“Yeah, you should have and you did, so don’t start again. We all need an escape, Kayo, but you’ve been distant and withdrawn these last few months. I need you, the men need you, and you need to be clear-headed to handle what’s coming our way.”
“This isn’t a battle or a storm that I can dig in and prepare for. It’s out of my hands.”
“If you say so.”
Kayo straightened, leaving the equipment on the ground. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
