Page 28 of Freedom Mine
“There’s no one to return to. My sister. . . I don’t know what happened to her. The slavers separated us.”
“I’m sorry about your parents and your sister. Maybe you can find her,” he added, trying to give her some hope, though the chances of finding her were slim to none.
While the Althirans kept precise records of slave sales, purchases, and transfers, they never shared those with anyone. Perhaps if she found the right person and could amass enough parchas to bribe him, she might get the information. Bribery held a severe penalty, making the attempt too risky.
With tears in her eyes, she said, “I don’t think I’ll ever find Vanni, and it’s shameful to admit this, but the second I’m free, I want to go home, to get as far from the Empire as I can.”
Even if she found her sister, she wouldn’t be able to free her, she had to know that. She shouldn’t feel guilty for wanting to leave the Empire without searching for her sister. She deserved to be free of this place and the guilt of moving on with her life.
“I felt the same before I earned my freedom status.”
Blue eyes, clouded from tears, went wide. He’d shocked her. Maybe he should have told her earlier. The past didn’t change the present. He still owned her.
“I didn’t know,” she said, her eyes retreating to the safety of that downward position, the proper stance of a slave.
Hells, he didn’t need her sympathy, any more than she needed his. He needed her to look at him like he mattered, not like he was one of the owners who had abused her.
“Please, Blue, don’t hide from me.”
She shook her head as she wiped away her tears. “I’ve thought horrible things about you, Kayo. I thought you were just another owner. It’s taken me time to believe everything you’ve said. Now, to know you were a slave as well. . . I. . . Why didn’t you say anything before?”
“Do you like to talk about your time as a slave?” he said, his voice clipped.
She bit her lip, as if she’d said something wrong. He hadn’t meant to be so harsh. Why couldn’t he say or do anything right around her?
“Blue, not even Jace and I talk about it much, and he was taken the same time I was.”
“Jace too?”
“Did you think that because the Althirans signed a treaty with my people that they agreed to give back all the soldiers they captured and enslaved?”
His fingers dug into the bed. “Our people sacrificed us. Either they were too scared to hold out for our release or they no longer cared. That’s part of the reason I never went home when I got my freedom status. The moment they sacrificed me was the moment I disowned them.”
He heard the anger in his words, but he couldn’t help it. It wasn’t something he’d ever forget or forgive. Turning prisoners into slaves was a common practice for the Althirans, and maybe he had no right to be so bitter after all these years, but he was.
He threw his head back and stared at the smooth, white, lifeless ceiling. “Don’t give up hoping like I did.”
“Do you miss it? Home, I mean,” she asked.
He swallowed, choking back the emotion. “Yeah, I miss it, but I can’t go back.”
“Even for family?”
Hells, she had a way of digging into the heart of the matter. He missed his family, terribly, but it was better this way. They’d probably been told he’d been killed. Better to let them think that than imagine what he’d been through as a slave.
“This is home now.”
Her hand settled on his arm, to commiserate perhaps. His pulse thrummed at her touch. Telling her had been easier than he had expected.
“I miss the snow,” he said. He wasn’t sure why he was telling her that of all things. With all this talk of home, memories were forcing their way to the surface. “The snow never seemed to end at home, but here, nothing, not a single flake.”
“I’ve never seen snow, except in pictures.”
“Really?” Visions of showing Blue her first snow, cozying up to her in a sled with his arms wrapped around her as they flew down a snow-covered hill filled his head and he smiled at the thought. “You don’t know what you’re missing.”
“Tell me about it,” she said, her eyes again bright and a calmness entered her face.
“Not much to say. I grew up sledding, skiing, building forts, and throwing snowballs. In between chores, of course. There were plenty of those too. My brothers and I had some awesome snowball fights.”
