Page 42 of The Flame of Carson
“What did you say?”
“That as perverse as it sounds yes.It was because it was the same night, I told you about my three fears.I told myself I was not going to bring this up till after this was over, but tonight...”Stacey paused, licked her lips as she gathered her thoughts.“Gage, baby, what if what happened tonight is a result of, well, whatever you went through overseas?Like a laden form of PTSD or something.”
Gage turned her words over.Was it possible?He pulled away from her and moved to one of the barstools and dropped into it.“I honestly do not know.I never really thought of my time overseas, especially in Iraq, as traumatic.Did I kill people, yes, I did.Does that bother me?I suppose on a human level it would bother anyone taking a life, but I never shot or killed anyone who was not shooting at me.I lost men, hell we all did.It is hard to lose a brother-in-arms, but it happens.I guess the only, traumatic thing that comes to mind was the mission that Ethan got hurt on.”
Stacey walked to his side and slid an arm around his shoulders.“It must have been hard for you guys.I do not know much about that except that Ethan went out without you guys and the team he was in charge of was ambushed.”
“That is right.I went up to Ethan an hour before he was to leave.I told him how I was feeling.A lot like I felt tonight when I woke up.I tried to talk him out of it, to let one of the other guys go or pass the command on to someone else.When we got word about what happened...This enormous guilt hit me.I should have been with my leader.We all should have been there.I was so pissed that I actually went to find the First Lieutenant who had ordered the op.If the guys had not been there, I would have hit the man.”
“What did you do?”
Gage sighed, rubbing the back of his neck.“I stormed into the command tent.He was sitting at his desk.He looked up, saw me, and damned if I did not see the fear of God in his eyes.He had only been in the Corps about a year and was an officer via college.This was his first command and first deployment.He knew nothing about what was going on.No seasoning to him whatsoever.Lance, Grant, and Tony were right behind me when I grabbed him by the lapels and hauled him out of the chair.
“I told him that if Ethan died, he would follow him.Ethan would not even be on a medical transport out of country if he had sent us out with him instead of being an idiot and sending Ethan out with a rookie team.It took Grant, Lance, Tony and two other Marines to get me to let him go.I think the only reason the MPs did not arrest me was because the captain walked in halfway through my speech.As Lance, Tony, and Grant were pushing me out I heard the captain tell the guy that he agreed with me.A month later, that Lieutenant was transferred out of camp.”Gage explained.
“Wow.”Stacey breathed.
“In a big way.Two days after that, we received word that Ethan was alive and heading back state-side.We also found out that we would be following him not much later.Those last few weeks in Iraq were hell for me.Ethan was not just my leader; he was my best friend.Me and the others were sidelined for the remainder of our time there.It was fine with us; we had no desire to go on missions without Ethan.”
Stacey frowned, “And now, I’m in trouble and instead of being out there, you’re sidelined again?”
His head snapped up.Could that be what was wrong with him right now?He had been unable to be at Ethan’s side in Iraq and Ethan had been injured.Was his mind and emotions being reminded of that now that he was not fully immersed in Stacey’s case?Yes, he was part of the team, but Ethan was keeping him on the peripheral.Unable to speak, he merely reached out and pulled Stacey back into his arms, holding her tight against him.Without another word and their arms around each other’s waists, they headed back upstairs to bed.Stacey lay her head over his heart.It was only after she heard and felt Gage’s breathing level back out, did she allow herself to close her own eyes and try to sleep once more.
Chapter 10
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His hand tightenedover the steering wheel as he watched Gage kiss Stacey and watched Stacey stroke Gage’s cheek then climb into her car.A few moments later, he watched her car and Gage’s truck pull out of the driveway and go in opposite directions.The man gnashed his teeth.He put the car in gear and followed Gage.His mind running a million miles an hour as he thought of all the ways to make them pay.Yes, soon.Very soon the plans they made would come to fruition.He pulled out his cell.
“I’m following Carson.”
“I have got eyes on my target as well.All these years, they will finally get the payback they deserve.”
“How are things going on your end?”
“Coming along as planned.You told me things are going good in Austin.”
