Page 80 of Heston
“Make-up sex?” Not what he’d expected. London’s face relaxed at the change of subject, though. That tiny signalhelped Heston relax, too. “Wish I’d heard the start of that conversation.”
For the first time since he’d brought her home, a twitch teased the corners of London’s lips.
“She’s tired of Alex hovering over her and treating her like she’s broken. She should be. She’s been through hell, but she’s not. Kelsey has bones that still need to mend, and I know this visit wore her out, but she made me laugh when she said she wanted some action.”
“Kelsey said that?” Now Heston had heard everything.
“I can’t believe it, but yes. She said she’s ready to get on with her life and put all this crap behind her. She has this amazing outlook on bad things that happen, you know, death and p-pain a-and… c-c-crap. Did you know she was married before and that her ex murdered her two baby boys?”
“Alex just told me, yes. How about we pick up where we left off, London? Can I interest you in taking a bath with me?”
“I want to, but…” She swallowed hard enough that Heston heard it.
“Lights off. No play-spanking. No worry about anyone looking in, either. Just us doing what we want to do.” Those things only worked when or if London wanted them anyway. Time to fess up. “The glass in the upstairs bathroom is tinted polycarbonate, babe. No one can see in, not even if they put their nose against the window.” He slapped a clenched fist to his chest. “Me, caveman, remember? I’d never let anyone see you naked.”
“Oh,” she breathed. “Good. But why—?”
“Because you’re a closet exhibitionist. At least, you liked the idea of being caught. Of being seen.”
The loveliest blush pinkened her throat. “Umm, I guess. Long as I’m caught with you.”
“And I only swatted your bottom because you seemed to like it. Spanking isn’t my thing. I’m not into that BDSM bullshit. But you got so turned on when I turned you over my knee that one time, and I thought—”
“Yeah. Let’s not d-do that anymore, okay? Maybe l-l-later. A lot later.”
Her anxiety was back, and it was time to change subjects. Heston stooped low and swung her into his arms. “No worries, babe. Not with me. Not ever. You want vanilla, you get vanilla. You want whipped cream and chocolate sauce over that vanilla, say the word. Whatever you say, goes, got it? I’m yours to command, so command me.”
At last a tiny giggle. “Like my very own genie in a bottle?”
Heston climbed the stairs to the loft.Their loft.“You bet. Though it better be a big bottle, because I’m a big genie.”
Another giggle. “Yes, you are, on all the best ways.”
“You know it.” The tight hold on his neck loosened. London pressed her head and one hand against his chest. They were at the bathroom door. “Bed or bath?” he asked.
“Bath. Then bed with you. I’ll… umm, move back into your room later today, and then—”
“Our room. Our house. Our bathroom and our tub, London. Move when you’re ready. No need to rush. You might still need time to yourself, and I under—”
“No, Heston.” London tipped back in his arms enough to stare up at him. “If Kelsey can be strong, so can I. She’s been through worse shit than me. I’m sorry I’ve made you feel like you have to walk on eggshells around me.”
Before he could argue, she continued. “I know how I’ve been. But now, I… I know I’m strong enough, that I’m good enough, all by myself.” There went another tough swallow. “I’m not my mother, and I don’t care what she or my dad say or think. I only care about you and me, about us. We’re the ones who matter,and I’m so, so thankful you came for me.” Her pretty eyes overflowed. “I don’t want to be a man. I’m not built like you, and I can’t compete with you. I just don’t want to.”
That insight explained a lot. Why she’d left him. Why she’d bombed out of the FBI. Possibly why she hadn’t lasted in the Forest Service. All her life, she’d been busting her ass, thinking she had to think, work, and be better than men.
He sat with her on his lap on the edge of the tub. “Babe, I’ve never expected you to compete with me.”
“I know, but ever since I was little, I got it in my head that—”
He knew where this was going. “That you weren’t good enough?”
“No. That I’m not good enough for anyone or anything.” She snorted. Laughed. Then broke into tears. “I can’t take a hit, Hes. Not even a little one. Look at me. I have a couple broken ribs, and my nose is still sore, and I don’t want to work for the FBI. I’m not even sure I should work with you.” She dashed a quick hand across her eyes.
Heston pressed her under his chin where she belonged. She melted easily against him.Thank God.“You were completely helpless, babe. They cuffed and beat you, London. No man could’ve protected himself in that situation, either. And I’m still going to say things wrong sometimes, but know this: You are so much better than most men I’ve worked with. It was you who defied Bates and kept searching for Alex and Kelsey when he quit on them. You led me and Asher to that trailer fire. You knew all along something was hinky with that piece of junk. You’re the reason Bates is in FBI custody. Another thing, I will never, ever stop protecting you, babe. Call me an ape, hell, call me a chauvinist pig. I’m okay with whatever you decide to call me. But you will always—always—come first in my life, and I’m not going to apologize if that hurts your feelings. I’m selfish, babe, but Isimply cannot live without you in my life. Hell, I could hardly breathe the morning I couldn’t find you. And once I found you…”
His body stiffened as the memory of Obermeyer holding London by her neck, her bare feet completely off the ground, killed him all over again. “Sorry, but I will destroy every rat bastard that ever touches you. I can’t NOT take care of you. I’m not made that way.”
“Okay,” she breathed, her fingertips dancing over his chest. “Settle down. I get it, Hes. I understand now, and I love you, too. I don’t have to be as good as you because I’m already better. Sorry, but yeah. I’m better than you. Kelsey reminded me us women are the only ones who can have babies. It’s not just how we’re made, it’s because we’re made completely different than guys.”
