Page 7 of Depths
“Nothing!” I snapped, hating how my dress jingled when I walked toward my dressing room, hating how my cheeks flushed and my heart dipped, knowing people hated me so much.
“I can taste your despair over it, you know, so it’s not nothing!” Declan retorted.
I’d already been close to the tipping point, but that comment made my fury build like an inferno. How dare he use his magic to invade my privacy! “Do you taste that? It’s called anger! At you!” I yelled, forgoing propriety and all sense, not caring that downstairs, strangers were slowly being let into the castle for the opening dinner and ball, and my door was still open. How dare he? How dare he say that in front of Felipe and Sahar? “Privacy please,” I growled at my guard and adviser.
Immediately, they bowed their heads and retreated, swimming out the door, Felipe giving me one last look before closing it carefully behind them. I could still see his shadow through the opaque glass, but the semblance of privacy was the best a queen ever got anyway.
“What the sard are you doing?” I hissed at Dec.
“Preventing you from doing something you’ll regret,” he replied, striding over to my tufted couch, a shipwreck find that had been brought in recently.
“I won’t regret it!” I snarled and dug my nails into my palms. Part of me wished I had access to my magic so that I could blast him with a jet stream of water. But a sea sprite could only access magic if she sacrificed all emotions, her heart, her humanity. And mine still beat weakly in my chest.
“You will. Look at Bloss.” He jerked his hand to the side, gesturing as if she were next to him. “She couldn’t handle the pressure—”
“Well, I’m not her!” This was exactly why I’d kicked them out of my castle. Overbearing, arrogant—
Declan didn’t listen to my retort, just stepped within slapping range as he continued, “And sheknew us, Avia. Your sister knew her intended grooms, most of them anyway, and she wasn’t ready. You’re trying to find strangers to wed, in a kingdom you don’t even know—”
“And whose fault is that?” I yanked the crown off my head and stomped around him to the dresser where I slammed it down. “Dead women’s. It’s theirs, and there’s not a damned thing anyone can do about it. It is what it is.” I grabbed a rag off the dresser and leaned into the mirror.Ack!My face was horrifying. Nearly half of it was a mottled blue-black, like a giant bruise. Splatters of darkness went across the bridge of my nose and speckled my other cheek. I peeled my teeth back and saw that they hadn’t escaped the destruction. They looked like pale agate stones.
I looked worse than the undead flower sprite, Posey, who had joined my army. And that was saying something, because half the skin around her mouth had rotted away. Perfect. What a lovely way to start the tournament for husbands. At least it would sort the shallow ones out. I scrubbed furiously at my stained cheek, even as I tried to strangle Declan’s reflection with my eyes. My eyes, which had turned violet when my magical nature had been revealed.
Until merely months ago, my reflection had shown brown eyes, brown hair, a human girl. Now, I had golden hair, violet eyes, and iridescent scales lining my cheekbones, the outsides of my arms and legs, and wings that were as wide and gorgeous as betta fish fins that I thought of as wings. Everything about my appearance had changed. Just as I felt I had. I’d grown harder in the caves where my birth mother had held me prisoner. Months ago, I might not have resisted Declan so strongly. Now, I felt no compunction to do as he wished.
“Exactly. You’ve been tossed about all your life, used as a pawn. I know what that’s like.” His voice grew soft and gentle. His parents had tossed him across the ocean as a treaty toy when he was young, so he spoke the truth.
I let my hard expression ease a bit as I said, “Yes, well, I’m not a pawn anymore. And you seem to be unable to comprehend that this is my choice. Mine.” I jabbed a finger at my chest and nearly broke a nail on one of the coins sewn into the bodice. I ignored my throbbing finger, because what I was about to say was too important. “This kingdom has been all but forgotten. Wiped from the map. And I have the power and connections to change that.”If I live,I thought wryly. But Declan hadn’t brought up that little tidbit yet, so at least my overbearing sister seemed to have enough sense to respect my privacy to keep that secret. A little. A very little.
Actually, I didn’t quite feel like forgiving her, but tapping into the longing I felt earlier, becoming wistful and wishing she were here, might make me cry. I couldn’t afford to pout, much less cry, because I had to change and get downstairs, so I just swept that thought under the rug. I stuck with one thought: Bloss was an ass for sending him.
Declan sighed. “You’re just as stubborn as she is, you know.”
I laughed and turned to face him, spreading my wings to either side and then leaning back against the dresser. “How dare you!I’mthe nice one.” But I said it with a smile on my face.
He chuckled. “Sometimes, I think you might be the cleverer one. Definitely more astute about all the ridiculous elbow-rubbing.”
“True. Bloss is more of an elbow-to-the-face kind of girl.” We shared a conspiratorial laugh, and the tension in the room lowered a bit. “I understand your intentions. And I appreciate them. I really do. But I’m fine.”
A knock at the door interrupted whatever Declan had been about to say. It swung open, and Sahar and Felipe drifted back in gracefully.
“I’m sorry, Your Majesty, but you have to get ready.” Sahar tried to smooth over her interruption with a smile.
As if she’d been waiting for Sahar’s voice as her cue to enter, one of my handmaids, a mermaid named Gita, swam out of a servant’s door at the back of the room, her golden tail glimmering, her breasts free and unbound as was the custom under the sea. A silver necklace with a modified seahorse on it, the sign of the royal house, swung on her neck and smacked against her breasts when she stopped suddenly at the sight of me.
“Oh, Your Majesty!” She didn’t soften the dismay in her tone at all as her eyes traveled over my stained face.
“Can I get something mint-flavored? Some of it got in my mouth.” I grinned to show her my awful teeth, and she recoiled.
“Yes. I will fetch you something. And some cream to remove that, um ...squidink?” she asked delicately, trying to verify the source of my humiliation.
I nodded before I turned back to Declan.
He just shook his head and sighed. “Bloss was right. We should have stayed longer. Helped you settle in.”
“I’m doing just fine, thank you,” I gritted out as I fluttered my wings and swam awkwardly over to the dressing partition, my dress clanking obnoxiously. My shoulders were ready to be rid of the thing, aching from the weight. As soon as I was hidden, I slid the straps down carefully, cracking my neck as soon as the bodice fell around my hips. The physical relief was counteracted by Declan’s sharp words.
“Why are you so resistant to our help?”
