Page 113 of MidKnight
I had to try, to see if this was the detail that the spell needed, wanted. I desperately hoped so. But, even if it didn’t work, at least my Blue would see from the afterlife that I tried, I cared, I regretted.
I leaned forward so that my lips brushed his cold ear and I whispered, “I bond myself to you. In mind. In body. In spirit. For all the days of my life.”
I looked up. The haze stood, unmoving, and tears gathered in the corners of my eyes.
That wasn’t the detail the spell was looking for, apparently.
My eyes closed. I was a murderer.
I’d killed my friend.
The impact of it didn’t sink in. Not truly. I was in a numb state of shock. I didn’t process anything emotionally. But intellectually I stood back and stared at myself.
I imagined how I looked at this moment, kneeling in a cave and covered in blood.
I looked at myself as one might look at a stranger. I felt like a stranger, like I had no idea who I was. I’d never thought of myself as a person violent enough for murder. I’d never thought of myself as a capable queen either, because I’d hated that casualties were part of that job. Apparently, I didn’t know myself very well. I had no idea what I was capable of. I’d killed many people tonight. Including someone who hadn’t deserved it.
Red dappled lights flitted against my eyelids.
“Bloss!” Ryan cried out in alarm.
I opened my eyes. The golden haze surrounded me. It descended like a rain shower made of light. The droplets of gold went around and past me, as if they were magnetic, drawn to one source only. Glittering golden droplets fell onto Blue’s skin and soaked in. I sat, amazed, as the drops spread like a web over his skin, linking the magic until he shone as brightly as the sun.
“What the hell …” Declan didn’t finish his sentence.
I ignored him and latched onto Blue’s hand, leaning forward, urging the magic to be more powerful than death once more. Urging it to fix my mistake.
I watched as the puncture I’d created in Blue’s belly knitted itself back together and the skin grew smooth once more. My heart beat harder and my mouth grew dry as I waited. After that outward sign, I couldn’t tell if it was working. The golden light continued to soak into his skin, but he wasn’t breathing. I leaned closer, putting my ear to his mouth. Nothing.
“Come on. Come on!” I squeezed his hand. “Hurry,” I whispered at the golden light, as if that would affect them. It didn’t. I started to rock back and forth. “Dammit all, you shite light. Bring him back. He’s my knight. You’d better be bringing him back.”
Cursing the magic didn’t seem to affect it either.
I dropped Blue’s hand and stood.
“Bloss,” Connor reached for me, but I pulled away. I was missing something. I was still missing something.
I started pacing, nervous energy wracking me.
If it it’s not bringing him back to life, what is it doing? I wondered. Sard! Does it need something else? I gave the vow.
My eyes dropped to Blue, where he lay in a pool of blood.
Sarding hell. I knew what had to happen next. Of all the stereotypical bullshite magical requirements. The magic wouldn’t bring him back to life until I sealed my vow … with a kiss.
I had to kiss the man I’d murdered.
My stomach roiled.
What the sard? Why did magic have to be such an asshole stickler for the rules? Why did it have to be so exact?
I closed my eyes and exhaled. This is my fault. All my fault. You have to do this, Bloss, you owe it to him, I thought.
I knelt back down next to Blue, trying to ignore the wet feel of blood soaking my cloak. I closed my eyes and mentally cleared my thoughts. The magic was healing him. He wasn’t technically dead anymore.
He’s … in a state of suspended animation, I told myself.
I pursed my lips and leaned forward, hands clenched inside my cloak, eyes still shut. But trying to kiss him that way meant I overshot his face. My lips only brushed his hair. Dammit!
