Page 28 of Knightfall
I froze. My heart stopped in shock. That was not something she’d said during any of our arguments. Ever.
She stared straight at me, steady and strong and … I saw a glimmer of affection in her eyes. Perhaps a hint of tears.
It was the only time I’d ever heard her acknowledge my death was a real possibility. Perhaps facing death herself had changed her.
My heart swelled with gratitude and pain at the same time. It felt like I was flying and falling in the same moment. Or as if I were lying in bed, during that dizzy second between waking and sleeping. “You mean it?” I asked, voice trembling, as I took a step toward her.
She pulled a piece of parchment from her stack. “I have a report of yet another sighting right here.”
I walked the final steps to her bed and took the sheet with a shaking hand. It bore Quinn’s seal and the current date.
My mother’s lip quirked up in a grin. “When you control the flow of information darling, you get to determine what information should flow. And after four years of accepting such tales, and seeing you again, if anything ever—”
“Thank you!” I hugged her tightly, pulling her into me and crushing her bones against mine. “Thank you,” I whispered in her ear. “Thank you. That’s all I ever wanted.”
She nods. “I know. I know now. Because it’s all I want. But it’s too late for me and mine.”
A tear dripped down my cheek.
“Oh, no, none of that,” Mother wiped the tear away and gave me a tight smile. “Queens do not cry.”
I swallowed down the rest of the tears, giving her a stiff nod.
“Your Majesty, you can’t mean this! You’re going to let her run again?” Connor stomped to the edge of mother’s bed and glared down at her. “You can’t allow it! She’d just said she wouldn’t leave and now you’re going to let her? She can just walk away again?”
I turned to mother and whispered, “I need to tell him.”
“No,” she cut me off immediately.
“I need to explain—” I said it louder, hoping that if I addressed the queen, but said it within Connor’s hearing, that the geas might be foiled. No such luck. My words were cut off.
“We don’t need your lies, Bloss. But the people need a steady hand. Your Majesty, don’t—” Connor argued.
Mother clapped her hands, summoning her lady-in-waiting and cutting off any further argument.
I clenched my fists and leaned close to her ear, pretending to straighten her pillow. “You have to let me tell—”
She held a piece of parchment in front of her face, as though she was reading. “No. It’s not safe.”
I leaned toward her, even as her maid and Connor both hovered close. “Why not?” I whispered.
“Because they don’t love you.”
I pulled back.
There was nothing I could say to argue with that.
Chapter Nine
When we left Mother’s chambers, Connor was fuming. Livid. The sunshine boy had turned into a solar flare.
“I’m not planning to leave,” I told Connor, hoping that reassurance would help resolve the issue.
“I’m not planning to care if you do,” he shot back.
“This is only in case of … dire circumstances,” I whispered as a chambermaid passed us.
“Like the dire circumstances last time?” Connor snarled. “What were those? Was there an assassination attempt on you? Just like your little sister now? Is that your go-to conspiracy?”
