Page 40 of New Dreams for the Village Nurse
‘You were Josh’s wife.’
‘Will always be Josh’s wife, but I’m not still doing the job that killed him. I’ve made a new start and it’s OK. In fact, though I feel guilty for saying it, it’s good. I love it here. I miss him, but…’
‘And there’s…Is there anyone…?’
‘Anyone else? No.’
The denial had come out before she’d even processed the question and Ottilie couldn’t understand where it had come from. But she didn’t want to tell Faith about Heath. Faith would think it was too soon; she’d disapprove. She’d wonder how Ottilie could move on so fast, how she could say she was devastated by Josh’s death and yet be in a relationship with someone else. And the fact was, Ottilie had real, deep feelings for Heath, perhaps even close to what she’d had for Josh, but she could never admit that to Faith. Not now, at any rate, and perhaps never, even if she eventually came clean.
‘Right, of course not. Sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you. I only meant?—’
‘You didn’t; it’s totally fine. I suppose it’s a natural question to ask. It’s been almost eighteen months, right?’
‘Exactly – that’s what I meant. People do start to think about it after that sort of time, don’t they? Not that I know, of course. But it’s what I heard. But I suppose everyone’s different.’
‘Listen, I’m sorry but I have to?—’
‘God, of course, you must be at work. I’ll let you get on. Just wanted to keep you in the loop.’
‘Thanks, that’s really good of you. I don’t know what I would have done without you since it happened.’
‘Take care of yourself. And let me know what you decide.’
‘I will. See you soon.’
Ottilie ended the call. With a deep breath, she pocketed her phone and headed back inside. Lunch break was almost over and there were patients waiting to be seen. There would be a time to unpick the tangled knots of her thoughts, but this wasn’t it.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Another weekend was fast approaching. Ottilie’s week had been strained, with news of the trial from Faith and having learned Fliss hadn’t yet decided whether she was going to retire or not, or whether Simon was going to stay.
‘All right, Ottilie,’ Geoff said cheerfully from behind the counter. ‘Want your bread rolls? We were getting low so I thought I’d put some up for you just in case.’
She put her milk on the counter. ‘Yes, I’ll take them as you’ve saved them for me.’
‘Sounding a bit weary there. Long week?’
‘Kind of,’ Ottilie said, forcing a smile for him.
Ottilie got out her reusable bag, and Geoff took it from her to pack her groceries. ‘Have you seen much of Flo this week?’ he asked.
‘Not really. It’s been one of those funny weeks where I don’t seem to have had time to see anyone. Why?’
‘No reason. Only that she came in yesterday and didn’t seem quite herself. I mean, she can be a bit cranky, but she seemed worse than usual.’
‘Oh, you know she can be up and down,’ Ottilie said, trying to believe her own words but a vague concern crept over her. ‘I’ll call later, though. Thanks for mentioning it.’
‘I’d call, but I think she opens up to you a bit more. You know, because of you and Heath.’
‘Of course.’
Geoff looked a little mischievous now. ‘And how is that going?’
‘Good,’ Ottilie said as neutrally as she could. Perhaps, on a different day or in a more positive mood, she might have been more enthusiastic. The truth was, her relationship and her new troubles with Heath had been on her mind more and more of late. There was all the weirdness around Mila, which they still hadn’t put the time aside to fully address, and the fact that he still hadn’t said those three little words to her. People could be in love without having to say it – she knew that well enough – but that coupled with everything else was unnerving. Her doubts were growing daily – was her relationship with Heath really as strong as she’d believed it to be?
‘Only good?’
‘Very good.’
