Page 101 of Petals and Strings
“Yours. I’m going to be yours,” I told her. Nothing and no one had made me feel the things she did. Not even my ex-omega. I loved my ex in my own way, but I realize now how superficial that love was. NaÏve and hopeful at best.
“I’m yours and so is our pack,” she promised. “We don’t need bites to be strong, Kane.”
“That’s an issue for when we get out of here,” I said. “We won’t know how we feel until we experience the world without these walls.”
Oddly enough, the idea of her bite on me, or theirs, didn’t scare me. This group had been different from the start. When the other pack ran, they helped me find my way, held my hand and kept me centered.
They were my future.
“I also want to be mine,” I admitted. “To find out what made me tick. Maybe reach out to Paul again. Figure out who I am.”
“I want that, too,” she said. “That’s why we’re doing this.”
I was glad she understood. Our relationship wouldn’t be conventional, but after everything we’d seen and been through, it couldn’t be. We needed something different.
“What does my file say about the pack? Are there any notes about what they said when I was brought in?” I asked.
Ares’s expression darkened and he let out a breath. “Truth?”
“Yes,” I said firmly. I needed to know. How could I heal and truly let all that go if I was hung up on the details, wondering if they’d ever come around to try and yank it all away?
“When new patients come in, they check in with their support system at the one month mark. They discuss ways to bring them in to visit, treatment plans, all that to keep you connected to your family and for them to know you’re alright.”
He shifted on his feet, but didn’t look away from my eyes as he finished. Ares was a strong alpha, a kind one. He was ready to catch me if I broke.
I couldn’t let that pack have any more of me. They’d taken and taken until I was wrung dry.
“What did it say?”
“That an alpha answered. Kevin, was the name. He said that the pack didn’t have need of a beta and if you broke it was because you were weak. They said the payment ended then and so did their obligation. That the pack rejected you and it was their legal right. Followed by some legal papers showing a formal rejection that was, apparently, left behind when they moved.”
“They fucking took everything from me. Left me without a goddamn word. Empty apartment, bills, then they closed off the bond and broke me. Then they want to act like they bear no blame?!”
“Use that anger,” Ares suggested. “It’s a great motivator. If used right, anger is not an unhealthy emotion. It’s a realistic one. Something that reminds you that you were wronged and won’t let it happen again. It’s when you use it to lock yourself off of true connections that it becomes an issue.”
“This guy’s good,” Ledger said with a chuckle. I snorted, then all of us lost it, the tension breaking as we used dark humor to cope.
“I think my mind has been trying to heal for so long,” I admitted. “Her face came out in art therapy, dreams, feelings. I just needed to accept it. Allow myself to face it.”
“That’s the first step. We’ll dive deeper in our sessions on how to cope with that. To truly understand that you were never at fault.” Ares gave my shoulder a squeeze. “That’s enough for today.”
“What’s on the itinerary for the rest of the day?” Audrey asked as we all went to grab our clothes for shower time.
“Art therapy, free period lasts a bit longer today, just don’t run from me again.”
“Sorry,” Audrey muttered. “We had to know we could trust you.”
“I get it. I do. Just not again,” he said, giving her no blame. I respected him more for that.
My fingers twitched, ready to hold a paintbrush and get my feelings out on canvas. I hurried through my routine, and the rest of my pack did, too, as if they sensed my urgency.
The therapist smiled as we entered, waving me over to my usual easel. “You look eager today.”
“Breakthrough in therapy. My mind needs this,” I admitted. Her expression softened.
“That’s what I’m here for. Stay as long as you need today. If you’re up for discussing after, you know I’m here.”
“Thank you,” I said as I filled my palette with colors and dipped my brush.
