Page 138 of Slew Foot
“I guess not,” Mickey agreed. He didn’t lookhappyabout it but he didn’t look mad about it either. “Why exactly did you tell Gavin though?”
“It kinda came up? Like in conversation.”
“Sure,” Mickey said doubtfully, eyeballing Rafe. “Conversations about our sex life regularly come up with the boss.”
Rafe sighed and put down the mouthwash he’d been holding. “Okay, but Gavin isn’t exactly the usual boss. Or like … GM.”
“He’s not,” Mickey agreed.
“Look,” Rafe admitted. “He’s worried about you. We all are.”
Mickey frowned. “Did he send Tom to talk to me?”
“He said he didn’t.”
“Okay.” The frown deepened. “So worrying about me led to you two talking about the fact I’m pissed I can’t tie you up right now?”
“Well,” Rafe said. “Sort of? I—I dunno. It made sense at the time, Iswear. And he promised he’ll keep it private.”
Mickey turned and stuffed the empty bags into their bag of bags that lived under the sink.
“Are you mad at me?” Rafe asked, biting his lip.
“No,” Mickey said. But he didn’t look at him.
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah.” Mickey looked up. “I just don’t know how to be what you need.”
“Can we maybe try to figure that outtogether?” Rafe asked. “Because that’s kinda what Gavin said when I told him I was worried about you. He said we need to talk more and be a team and fight thistogetherrather than you pushing me away and stuff.”
Mickey’s face crumpled. “I have been doing that, haven’t I?”
“I mean, you haven’t broken up with me, so that’s something,” Rafe joked.
“But I have hurt you, haven’t I?”
“Not intentionally,” Rafe said. “But yeah, it kinda sucks to feel like you don’t even want me to help, you know?”
“Yeah, I know.” Mickey stepped forward, sliding his arms around Rafe’s waist. His voice was thick when he spoke again. “I’m sorry. I love you and I want us to figure this out together. I do. I suck at it but I want to try. I want to be better for you. I promised you I wouldn’t do what Logan did and yet here we are.”
“It’s okay.” Rafe wrapped his arms around Mickey’s waist. “I get it.”
So, maybe he had a thing for guys who weren’t great at talking about shit. At least Mickey was willing to work on it.
Mickey tipped his head forward, letting it rest on Rafe’s shoulder and for a few minutes they stood there, breathing in unison.It made the tight feeling that had appeared in Rafe’s chest this morning melt away.
“Wanna go take a nap?” Rafe asked after a while.
“Sure,” Mickey said, straightening, but he only pulled back far enough to look Rafe in the eye. “And maybe after, if I feel up to it, I can give you a handjob. You didn’t jerk off this morning, right?”
Rafe shook his head. “Nope.”
“And, if I don’t feel great, you could jerk off on me instead, maybe?”
Rafe shivered, loving that idea. “Yeah, definitely.”
Mickey smiled. “And maybe after we can look online for some ideas for stuff that’s a little less demanding than tying you up and edging you. I like that dynamic and I know we both miss it.”
