Page 76 of The Girlfriend Card
“He must’ve been your hero growing up.”
“Oh, absolutely, he was. The whole city loved him. The kids at school all wore his jersey. But he wasmydad.” My smile strained. “And yet … I guess it’s difficult.” A lump swelled in my throat, and the words stopped coming. I found it hard to continue.
“What’s difficult?” Ottavia asked, encouraging me to dig deeper.
“I guess it’s hard for me to truly get close to him.”
“Why?”
I drew a deep breath. “You know. Everyone looks at me, and all they can see is, ‘the son of the Golden One,’ and they’realwayscomparing me to him. But my dad was sogood at hockey, that it’s basically impossible for me to be as good as he was. So when I don’t live up to expectations? Suddenly, I’m a failure. A disappointment. An embarrassment to the Easton name.”
“You arenota failure. You’re a professional hockey player. You’re among the very best in the world.”
“I know, I know,” I groaned, though I clearly didn’t believe it. “The thing that kills me is, everyone seems to think that if I just tried harder, or dedicated myself more, I’d be as good as my dad. But no one considers that the problemmightbe that I’m just notthat guy. It’s like I’m not allowed to be myself, you know? I have to play like my dad—which I can’t. It’simpossible. No one can.”
“That must be really hard.”
“Yeah.” I sighed. “Now am I saying that I’m perfect? No. Hell no. IknowI’m not. Because yeah, I like to party. And yeah, I like girls, too. But guess what? So did my dad. So dideveryoneback in my dad’s day—they all partied like animals. And from the stories my dad has told me, they partiedwayharder than we party now.”
She giggled. “After hearing about his hot young wife, I totally believe it.”
I snickered, too. “But whatever. None of that matters. No one cares how much they partied back in the day. All that matterstodayis that I feel thisconstantexpectation, this crushing pressure”—I beat the center of my chest—“that I be as good as my dad. And it keeps me up at night. Literally! Did you know I have trouble sleeping before a big game? I’ll lay in bed, tossing and turning for hours, because I can’t get my mind to shut the hell up. Andthat’swhy I was out ‘partying’ before Game Seven. Because it was theonlyway to quiet my mind and maybe get some sleep that night.”
“Aw, Dakota. You poor thing.” She jutted out her bottom lip. “What is it, exactly, that’s running through your mind? What’s making you so upset?”
The turmoil festering in my heart intensified, its energy frantically swirling. It commanded me to stop looking at it, to go the hell away, to leave it buried and alone. But with Ottavia by my side? I wouldn’t.
Instead, I took a deep breath, and let it out.
“It’s the thought that … because I’ll never be good as he is … I’m somehow letting my dad down.”
Whoa.
After I spoke those words, my heart lurched so hard in my chest, I was certain Ottavia had killed the engine again—but nope, the engine continued to purr. Ottavia slowed the car to a gentle stop and shut the engine off.
She turned to me with sorrow in her eyes. “Dakota …”
“I know.” I rolled my eyes at myself, embarrassed at how vulnerable I’d made myself. “I didn’t even know I had that inside me. And it’s stupid of me to bitch about, because really, I’ve been givensomany advantages just because of who my dad is. So who am I to whine about it?”
She reached over and gave me her hand. “It’s just like what you told me at lunch. Just because you’ve had advantages doesn’t mean your struggles and your pain aren’t real.”
“Yeah. You’re right.” Chuckling, I squeezed her hand tight. “Maybe we’d be wise to listen to each other, huh?”
“Easier said than done, I know,” she said with a wry smile.
“God. Ain’t that the truth.” Embarrassed, I looked around and realized we were stopped in the middle of a desolate parking lot. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to make you stop driving. You can keep going.”
But she shook her head. “What’s the rush? I like talking to you.”
“Yeah?”
She nodded. “Actually, this is the best date I’ve ever been on.”
Part of me grinned that she’d called it a date, and wanted to pump my fist. Theotherpart of me recoiled, appalled.
“Ottavia,pleasetell me you’re joking. That can’t be true.”
She snickered. “I’m serious! I think it’s so sweet you took me out here to teach me how to drive.”
