Page 65 of Captured By the Cold Duke
“It has!” Thomas protested now, nudging his wife playfully.
“Oh yes! The late nights… the screaming babies… the spit-up and nappies!”
“Don’t the nannies and wet nurses do that?” Samantha asked curiously.
“Well, yes, but I like to do as much as I can. They’remychildren, after all.”
“Don’t scare your friends off from having children of their own,” Thomas warned, and Cherie laughed. She leaned forward and looked down at her sleeping sons. They were currently wrapped around one another, Edward spooning his older brother, while Gareth had his thumb in his mouth.
As she gazed down at them, she felt such a complete fullness of love that she felt tears prick her eyes.
Oh no. Not again.Ever since the beginning of her confinement, she’d been unable to stop crying. It was starting to irritate her to no end.
She looked back up at her husband, and a secret, knowing smile passed between them. They both knew what it said:Despite all the late nights, screaming babies, spit-up, and nappies, this is the best thing that’s ever happened to us.
“You won’t be scaring anyone away from having children if you keep looking at each other like that,” Minerva commented, and Cherie blushed and looked away. Her friend’s eyes were sparkling.
“You two make having twins look like the most beautiful and rewarding pinnacle of your love.”
“It really is,” Thomas said, and Cherie knew she could no longer hold in the tears. They began to spill down her cheeks, but instead of laughing at her, Cassandra leaned over and hugged her.
“I can’t stop crying!” Cherie moaned as she set her head on her friend’s shoulder.
“I was like that, too,” Cassandra reassured her.
It struck Cherie then, not for the first time, how lucky she was to have these three women in her life. Each was so different from the other and brought such unique perspectives into her life. There were moments when she wanted Minerva’s pragmatism, other times when she needed Samantha’s fiery opinions, and many more when all she craved was Cassandra’s gentle warmth.
“Parenting will be hard,” she said out loud to the room, as Cassandra hugged her close. “But I know that I will be able to do it, and do it well, with you three, and my husband, by my side.”
“We’ll be here filling your children’s heads with reformist ideas,” Samantha assured her.
“And love,” Cassandra added.
“I think Edward just pinched his brother!” Minerva exclaimed, and Gareth’s loud wail filled the room, breaking the spell of the moment—although not before Cherie was sure she’d seen each of her friend’s eyes grow bright with tears.
Much later, after the girls had gone home, Cherie and Thomas sat together in the nursery, once more watching their sons sleep.The twins were only a few weeks old and still so small that Cherie couldn’t believe they would one day grow into adults. They were so fragile, so tiny, so vulnerable, and yet, she didn’t feel as afraid as she’d thought she would. Perhaps it was because she had Thomas by her side, and she knew he would always keep them safe.
She looked at him. In the moonlight that shone in through the window, he looked so peaceful she almost didn’t want to disturb him. But there were things she needed to ask him, so she reached out and took his hand.
He looked at her at once.
“They’re so perfect, aren’t they?” he breathed.
“Yes. Absolutely perfect.” She hesitated. “And how does it feel so far, being a father?”
“It feels wonderful,” he said at once. “Other than being your husband, it is the best role I’ve ever taken on in my life.”
“Do you really mean that?” She looked deeply into his eyes, trying to see some kind of hesitancy or doubt. “It would be okay if there was still some lingering worry about all this, after all that time of telling yourself you wouldn’t have children.”
Thomas smiled and shook his head. “I know you would support me even if I were struggling, but I assure you, I’m not. All my anger at my father and my shame at not being a truebornson--or so I thought at the time--evaporated when I confronted Rochford last year. Knowing you were in danger like that, it taught me what really matters. And it isn’t allowing the ghost of a dead man to haunt me and prevent me from being happy in life.”
“I know,” Cherie said, squeezing his hand. “But I also know that sometimes these feelings can come back.”
“Not for me. I have never been as happy in all my days as I am now, Cherie, as your husband; as Gareth and Edward’s father; as part of this family.”
“Stop, or you’re going to make me cry again!” Cherie laughed.
Thomas chuckled, then grew serious again. “You know, I was thinking earlier about something your brother once said to me when he first learned that the duchess was expecting. He said that when you and I had a child, I would realize I’d do anything on earth to protect you both and make you happy. And he said…you’ll know that there is nothing that child could ever do to make it unworthy of your love. Because your love is unconditional.”
