Page 31 of Actions and Reactions
Not getting weird looks while I’m walking around helps my general mood, but when I knock on Vinny’s door, takeout bag in hand, and find him shirtless and still wet from a shower, some lightness actually sneaks into my chest.
In that moment I can’t believe I even let go of him to fall asleep the other day. My sudden desperate need for him overtakes me, and so I dump the bag of food by his feet and launch myself at him.
And the weirdest thing happens... he gives it right back to me. His hands fist my shirt in a move as needy as my kiss, and a kind of gratitude sneaks in along with relief.
While we undress and make our way sloppily to his bedroom, I realize that having him again will probably fix any issues in my life.
All I need.
He fucks me again, and afterward, when I’m applying the muscle-relaxing lotion on my leg, he takes over and massages me for a while. Then we eat, we play videogames, we talk about our siblings, and even briefly about the news that Santa and Charlie are retiring—which we both suspected.
August
Attending a wedding of two relative strangers isn’t my idea of fun.
Then again, my foul mood might be stopping me from even trying to enjoy it.
Of course I know Bear, and well enough I suppose.
I do work closely with the players, and have in the last month made it a point to have a long meeting with each of them to help us all do our jobs better and get them more endorsement opportunities, so yeah, I do know Bear.
And I was honestly surprised, flattered, and touched when he told me about two weeks ago that I was invited to his wedding.
With everything that happened over the summer with the Rogues, and their quarterback’s family drama being put on the front pages for the world to consume like entertainment, Gab hasn’t had much time for me, and I don’t blame her or resent her in the least. But it has meant I’ve had to take charge more than I did last season.
The fact that she’s trusted me to do so is actually amazing, and another very flattering thing for me.
Being here now, though . . .
Well, Drew and Bear are obviously in love, and their vows are lovely, sure. The fact that Bear has his three sisters standing next to him as his “best women” is adorable, and Drew’s connection to his own best man, Xander, is also clear as day.
But I can’t shake the need to jump up and flee from this place.
Illogical, of course, since we’re in an amazingly well-tended garden full of what must be a million different plants and trees. It’s warm, but we’re in a very shaded area and there’s a nice breeze. I bet it’s not just me who feels the overwhelming sense of love and happiness in the air. Generally, it’s just a really nice day, place, and event.
So why am I feeling this way?
It’s been happening more and more lately.
This jittery feeling in my belly when Vinny and I are at the facilities—now back at the practice rink since the remodel finished a week ago—or the few times we’ve gone out to eat at different restaurants.
Just four days ago, when Santa and Charlie arrived for the festivities, Vinny tried to convince me to go out to the joint bachelor party with the whole team, but I couldn’t bring myself to go. So I made some excuse about having to work on a brand deal for Twocox and got out of it.
I do wonder why he didn’t press—that’s unlike him from what I know of him—but he seems so much... calmer these days. Well, normally. Today we’re sitting side by side and I’ve heard him sniffle three different times whenI don’t think I’ve seen him cry since we were eight years old or so.
When the ceremony is over and the grooms are kissing to thundering applause, when we’re directed to another area of the garden where there are fruity cocktails and delicious canapes, Vinny takes my hand and pulls me over to Jules and Sterling. Vinny admires his captain and husband like every other player on the team—just a smidge over the top.
It’s the type of loyalty I’ve never encountered except in hockey teams.
That’s not to say I think it’s the only place it exists, but it’s not like I’ve been around any other kinds of teams, so...
I only half listen as they talk about the ceremony and then about the upcoming season. It’s not news to me that Mater, Jules’s best friend and the only veteran defender left on the team—though Bates will become a veteran soon enough—is going to retire after this season, but they whisper about it in worried tones for one minute.
That’s all they’ll allow themselves, it seems, because when there’s a beat of silence they change the topic forcibly to Sterling’s residency at the Winner Resort and their three kids.
All I’m able to do for all that time is feel my palm getting damper by the second in his, feel the beat of my heart increase, and the stiffness creep into my right leg until I’m about to beg for a chair.
But then we’re told the reception tent is ready for us, and I don’t have to beg.
