Page 24 of Actions and Reactions
He leans in to kiss me again, smiling so big he can barely close his lips enough for a kiss, but it’s still fucking perfect.
“This is nice,”I muse out loud, because I seriously have no clue what else to say.
I mean, Vinny’s apartmentisnice. It’s all gray walls and big furniture in different shades of brown.
The leather couches complement the dark wood chairs well, and the big windows looking out at the Strip a few blocks away are spectacular, of course.
“Thanks,” he says, and though I think he’s trying to hide it, I can hear the twinge of nerves in his voice. “I ordered us Greek food, hope that’s okay?”
“Yeah, that’s perfect,” I tell him honestly and turn to look at him.
He holds out a glass of water and I take it gratefully while I let my eyes feast on him. He’s wearing washed-out jeans and a white tee, no socks or shoes so he looks... really at home. Comfortable.
“I’m nervous.” I blurt out the confession.
“Why?” he asks, looking perplexed.
“Because.” The start of the word comes out strong but by the end it’s pretty much lost all steam. I look down and away. I really don’t want to have this conversation, but I’m the one who blurted it out, aren’t I?
So now I have to deal with it.
“You can tell me anything,” he says after a long beat of silence.
I look up from under my lashes and see his big eyeslooking intently at me. So sincere and caring, Vinny isn’t one to make fun of you for the hell of it.
Like Uncle Ruko, he has a gentle soul underneath all that muscle.
If there’s anyone in the world I can tell this to and know they won’t shame me for it, it’s him.
So why am I hesitating so much?
“I’ve never had sex.”
Nothing bad happens after I say it, he just looks even more confused.
“Uhh, yes you have. We’ve had sex.”
“No, I mean, like... you know...” I trail off and feel every bit of my inexperience.
“Penetration?” he asks, the tips of his mouth twitching, though he’s clearly trying to control his laughter.
“Yes, that,” I mumble. I don’t blame him. I mean, I am a grown-ass man who couldn’t say one simple word.
“We don’t have to do that, you know, Si?”
“I know, I know... but I want to.”
“Okay, then, we can whenever you want. But it also doesn’t have to be tonight.”
“I want it to be tonight.” My voice matches my certainty this time.
“So after dinner, or before?” He takes one tiny step closer while staring at me with that sexy fucking smirk on his face.
“I think before,” I tell him, my voice breathy. “I can’t really kneel, though,” I blurt out, remembering suddenly that this could become an issue.
“Yes, you told me that the other day.” He nods slowly.
“Even on a mattress,” I press. “That’s not an option for me if I want to continue living mostly pain free.” For some reason my words make his frown deepen for a moment, but then he shakes his head and he’s back to looking at me with his puppy-dog eyes wide and full of care. Maybe full of something more, but I don’t really feel like thinking about that at the moment.
