Page 37 of Actions and Reactions
“Mr. Jankowski?”
The deep voice brings me back to the present where Dr. Kekoa is standing right by me, staring down with horrifying pity in his eyes. I stand as fast as I can and look at the doctor, not ready to hear what he has to say, but I don’t have a choice.
“What is it?” My voice is rough.
“The surgery went well,” he says quickly and his face relaxes. “He’s still sleeping, and he’s got a long road to recovery ahead of him, but it went well.”
“Ca-can I see him?” The relief of the good news is short-lived, since now I have to actually deal with... everything.
“Yes, follow me.”
Uncle Paul and Aunt Elle should be here any minute, but unlike last time the surgery was short and so I’m the one Silas will see first.
He looks just the same, apart from the bandaged hand of course, but his face is as relaxed as it always is when he sleeps.
“There’s the call button if you need anything.” Dr. Kekoa points it out, then makes a silent exit. I sit in the armchair next to the bed and take his uninjured hand in mine. Then I just stare at him.
I seriously could stare at him forever.
For better or for worse, when I think about my life, including the seven years we didn’t talk, the first thing that comes to mind is his smile.
I know it so well, no amount of time apart could change that smile. Not when it’s real and genuine.
“You should be sleeping,” he says and startles me. Eyes still shut, his grip tightens on my hand for a long moment, and then he finally looks at me again. There’s no pain in his eyes, but I know that’s going to change soon enough. I know we both have to deal with what happened sooner rather than later, but I just need to take this moment, to imprint it on my mind so I’ll always have it with me.
One way or another things are going to change once welet the real world inside this room, and yeah, I’m not ready even though I’ll have to be, but we’ll do it, and we’ll be better for it.
“I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be.” I cup his head with my free hand and lean in to kiss his cheek. “How are you feeling?”
“Tired.” He does sound groggy.
“That’s probably the anesthesia, but do you have any pain?”
“I barely feel anything.” His lopsided grin makes him look younger, and my heart yearns for that time when everything was so much simpler.
“Well, you can fall asleep again if you want, Si.” I kiss his forehead again then sit back. “I’m going to be right here, and?—”
“What? No, you have to go home and get a good night’s sleep.” He sounds more awake than before and angry... again.
“Si, don’t be ridiculous,” I whisper, exasperated and so tired all of a sudden. I rub my forehead and look down for a moment, trying to come up with the right words to say in this moment.
Three come to mind, but that didn’t go so well last time, so...
“I’ll tell Gab?—”
“Nothing,” he snaps. He pushes my hand away from his then presses the button to bring his bed up. “You won’t tell Gab anything because I’m fine, and so are you. You’regoing to play tomorrow night, so you need to get your head in the game and not be worried about me.”
Is he fucking serious?
“How the fuck do you suppose I could do that?” I demand. “Not worry about you when you’re in the fucking hospital.”
“You have to play, Vin,” he insists, like he didn’t hear what I just said. I don’t understand why he thinks I’m not going to play, though... “I don’t need anything from you, and even if I did, you have to play because that’s the dream, isn’t it? It’s more important than anything else.”
Shock is too mild a word.
Is he seriously saying?—
“I see you’re awake.” Dr. Kekoa comes back in and he has a woman with him this time. I spare them a glance and a greeting nod but then I have to look at Silas again.
