Page 116 of Falling Backwards
So to distract myself from rootless nervousness about Kyle, I turned to thinking about me and Luke, which left me…tangled.
It’s a loop I’ve been stuck in.
And that’s why, yes, I feel weird as Ronald comes to the front of the house to unlock the door and let me, bartender Tia, and server Dan out into the rainy night.
At least I know Luke has arrived and is in one of the spots right outside.They’re supposed to be for Lucent patrons only, but at an hour like this and on a day like today, it’s not a problem for him to pick me up here.Even I will admit that.
I exchange goodbyes with Tia and Dan, and they share his umbrella as they head for the employee parking lot.I rush to the passenger side of Luke’s car, the door of which opens from the inside when I get close.
The second I’m shut in, I’m utterly overwhelmed by the safe, dry warmth of the cabin.
“Hey,” he greets me.
A relieved sigh puffs out of me.“Hey.Gosh, I’m happy to see you.”
The unplanned words leap through my stomach and echo between us.
“Are you?”he asks curiously.
I shiver, shiver, shiver and buckle my seatbelt.Figure I may as well tell the whole truth.
Turning his way, I rub my cold hands together.Thanks to the light pole outside, he’s pretty visible, and it’s a great thing; the shifting shadows of raindrops all over him bring something soft yet striking to his face.
“Yes,” I answer.“Work was so, so slow—I got so bored I even left my stand a few times and just watched the rain.Then it started getting really eerie how quiet and empty the restaurant was, and I got nervous wondering what would happen if Kyle showed up.I’ve been circling anxiety for probably three hours thinking about him bothering me without anybody being able to stop him.”
Luke gives a lazy wave.“Nah, I would’ve stopped him.”
“Of course—if you were here.”
“Yeah, exactly.”
I narrow my eyes.“Exactly.I’m saying I started getting worried this evening, a while after you were gone.”
“AndI’msaying I’ve been out here since 7:03.I was only gone for, like, an hour and a half.”
My hands still their rubbing.
He adds, “If he was gonna show up and walk in the building, I was going in right after him.”
Astonished, I stare at him.
He’s been here nearly the whole time?
It’s only now that I really process how everything looks in this car.There’s a mostly empty bottle of water in the cupholder, next to his phone, which is charging.A closed-up fast food bag is tucked away in my floorboard.I realize he’s lounging in his seat in the cool-and-unconcerned way I’ve seen many times at Merritt’s, but it doesn’t annoy me, doesn’t make me think he hasn’t been taking anything seriously.
It seems he has been taking thingsveryseriously.
“You’ve…” I frown, “…you’ve been sitting out here for hours?”
“Yep.”
“Just to watch out for me?”
“Yep.”
I murmur, “Luke, it’s Saturday night.There were things you wanted to do for yourself, weren’t there?And didn’t you get bored or cold or uncomfortable?”
“Nah, I’ve been fine.”
