Page 108 of The Singing Trees
The redhead sidestepped and started a conversation with Mitch.
“Bar Harbor,” Annalisa said, and she could hear the shakiness in her voice. Standing there alone with him was too much. The tension in the air grew thick like the fog that coated the mornings at Graystone, and she felt like her face betrayed her as she fought to keep from going dizzy.
She hated that Thomas saw her this way, her face a billboard advertising how much he still affected her after all these years, and she desperately needed to get out of there. Apparently, Mitch wasn’t privy to all the facts; she’d seen the photo.
“Anyway,” she said, “I’ve gotta run, but good to see you. I’m glad things are going okay.” She hoped he couldn’t hear the weakness in her voice.
Thomas glanced over at the redhead, as if he wanted to explain himself, as if he had so much more to say. “Yeah, you too.”
She seriously had to leave. With his smile and easy look, he was digging open old wounds with a knife and pouring salt into them, causing her some sort of anxiety attack.
“I’ve got to go,” she blurted out too obviously, the idea of escaping making her feel better.
Starting with his shoulders, his entire body frowned. “I understand. Well, it’s good to see you.” He seemed perplexed by her rush to get out of there.
She couldn’t help it, though. Offering a wave and a goodbye to Mitch and the redhead, Annalisa rushed away. She didn’t have to turn around to feel him staring at her. There were so many questions she wanted to ask, but she couldn’t.
Why hadn’t he come to find her upon his return? That made no sense, especially if he hadn’t brought a girl home. Not that she would have given a cheating boyfriend a second chance. No matter what had come of their relationship, he’d definitely kissed her. And where there was kissing, there was certainly something else. The war was not an excuse for stepping on their love with a breach of trust.
It wasn’t that Annalisa wanted him back—despite how much she still loved him. At least she didn’t think so, but seeing him was so painful.
Climbing into the Plymouth on Congress Street, she collapsed into the seat. She gasped for air, gasped for how she’d felt before he’d just rocked her world. Looking through the windshield at the car ahead of her and then the busy street, she clutched her chest and focused on her breathing. How would she react if he knocked on the window now? She might have a heart attack. She turned and scanned the area back toward the market. Lots of people were coming and going. Thankfully he wasn’t one of them, and her breathing started to normalize.
How could he have such a strong effect on her after all these years?
This was exactly what love was, she thought, a feeling you have for people who didn’t always deserve it. She remembered that samefeeling with her father, hating him for everything he’d done to her mom and her, but at the same time, she’d never failed to hug him with forgiveness over and over. This was one of the faces of love: painful and unavoidable.
Afraid he might come find her and see her this way, Annalisa pulled away. She hadn’t gone by Walt’s place in a long time, but something drew her there. She found a nearby parking spot and stepped out of the car. A wealth of memories flooded in: Walt, the noon and midnight bells, the day Jackie Burton walked through the door and offered Annalisa a spot on her walls. She and Nonna had sold the building, and a clothing boutique now occupied the shop.
Looking up to her old balcony, she saw very clearly Thomas and her during his one visit to her apartment. She remembered pointing a shaky finger at Vietnam, so incredibly unsure of what lay ahead. If only she hadn’t gone to Hawaii. Her thoughts led her gaze left to the Leaning Tower of Treeza and the phone booth across the street, the scene she’d drawn him while he was in training.
Dipping back into the car, she found some change and then slipped into the booth, sliding the door closed behind her. She’d stared down at this booth for years as a watcher, imagining the lives of the men and women inside, but she’d never been inside herself. Until now.
When Nonna answered, Annalisa said, “I just called to check on you guys. Everything going okay?”
“All’s well. Glen is about to pick up Celia and take her down to the Village Green. She’s cleaned up from a bath and dressed in her finest.” Glen had become a good friend to all of them, the uncle Celia would never have.
The image was like a dose of calm. “Can I talk to her?”
A moment later, she heard, “Momma.”
Her voice was exactly what Annalisa needed to hear. “I just wanted to say I love you, Celia.”
Her daughter replied with something that made no sense but was rich with love, a love that uprooted even more guilt. Annalisa’s crime wasn’t as simple as having kept her daughter from her cheating boyfriend. She’d also been lying to Celia, and that was so much worse.
“I’ll see you in a few hours,” Annalisa whispered and then ended the call.
She left the booth and stared back up at the balcony one last time. Had she protected Celia or hurt her with this deception? And what if Thomas found out now? What would happen? As much as she had justified hiding Celia from him, she never could absolve herself of the guilt of her crimes. Celia was getting older, starting to understand things. She would be asking about her father soon. Annalisa wasn’t sure what she would say.
Climbing back in the car, she gathered her wits and made the long drive back to Bar Harbor.
Chapter 40
RUN, RABBIT, RUN
Annalisa unloaded her new pieces at the gallery and arrived home just in time to catch Glen returning Celia from their day downtown. She’d been gone only two nights, but it always felt like an eternity, her time without her daughter. She heard a car door shut and dashed outside. Setting eyes on Celia was still like seeing a shooting star, and her mouth stretched into a smile.
“Hi,bambina!”
