Page 22 of Finding the Forward: Part Two
While it wasn’t that comfortable, it was private. Sure, people might assume we were having sex, but they did that anyway. The other people with packmates on the team were allwitheach other. It wasn’t uncommon to catch Nakey and Pauly in the showers.
“I guess.” I shrugged as I took a bite of my chicken burger.
Grif’s brows furrowed. “I was one of his first clients, and I stayed with him out of loyalty because he believed in me. If he has something on me, I don’t know what it is. Fuck, what if he knows?”
“Then we’ll deal with it. I can’t let him wreck the pack or our careers.” I sipped on my vitamin water.
“What aboutmine?If he knows, and tells, it’s over.” He looked stricken, his scent going sour.
I put my arm around him. “After you talk to the doctor, we need to come up with an actual plan. Depending on what your body is going through, your days of hiding might be numbered, anyway. Though I’m confident Stu can fix things for you like he did with Dean.”
“I’m not Dean.” He sighed and took another bite.
“We’ll still love you if you don’t play hockey. Peoplewantyou to conduct. Peoplewantyour songs. Worst case, we get you a music agent, set you up with a studio, and you make music and join AJ’s recreational league. Spend more time fucking our little alpha in her greenhouse. Maybe coach some kids.” I gave him another squeeze.
Grif was so sure his life would be over if he had to come out as omega. I didn’t think his career would end there. Even if he did, there was so much he still could do and had to live for.
But then hockey had always been how he proved his value. It made my heart ache that after all these years he didn’t see how he was so much more.
Though I did worry about his health.
Grif’s eyes met mine, wary. “You’d be okay if I didn’t play hockey? Don’t get me wrong, I’d much rather play hockey, but my biggest hesitation about pursuing music is that I wouldn’t be able to contribute what everyone else does to the pack.”
“Grif.” I pulled him tighter, careful of our food. “Our pack isn’t hurting for money–and one of the great things about packs is that they allow for everyone to have a job they like. Not to mention, you’ll still make more than our little alpha.”
“Until she works for Spencer and changes the world with her happy flowers.” He snorted, head resting on my shoulder. “You know I’ve been getting texts asking me about his dream team. The Daredevils are an established team. It’s not like he’d fire everyone and start over.”
“I’ve been asked, too. Look, I know the idea of coming out as omega is scary. We’ll be behind you–always. Verity will still love you. Do I want you to stay with the Knights? Yes. Will we go after the Knights legally if they fire you for being an omega? Yes. Will we figure something out if you have to go to another team? Of course. We love you and we’re here.” I toyed with his red hair.
“That… that means a lot.” His voice choked up. “I don’t want to be an omega. Never have. If I come out, I’m afraid that’s all people will see me as. It’s hard to only be seen for something you don’t even want to be.”
“We’ve always seen you as you, Grif, you know that–and Verity will, too.” I hoped that she’d forgive him for this.
“She will. I’m sure of it. All of this is terrifying, and you’re right, I’ve been feeling everything so much more since I found her. Oddly enough, Ilikesome of it. Which then makes me feel like shit for putting AJ off for so long because I didn’t want to deal with my feelings.” He sighed again.
“AJ loves you.” I squeezed his hand. AJ was a good guy and brought a lot to the pack, even if he was a stubborn fuck sometimes.
“I’m not ready for my career to be over.” He pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger. “Not to mention, we can’t just pick up and leave. There are no professional omega forwards. Not even in the minors. There’s a couple at the collegiate level.” Defeat crossed his face. “But…”
“Publicomegas in thePHL. We know of what? Five secret omegas? Three of which are forwards. That’s not including Ellie.” Who we were pretty sure was a gamma, but told everyone she was a kappa. She wasa forward andenforcerfor the Sasquatches.
The other two were a goalie and defender who masqueraded as a beta couple and were part of an omega pod–an all-omega pack. Dean had a secret omega support network going on.
“True.” His shoulder slumped.
“I’m not afraid of moving elsewhere. We can make things work. Or Verity can have Spencer buy the Royals instead of the Daredevils, and we can move into the house you bought Dean for Christmas. Problem solved.” I grinned.
He laughed. “Absolutely. It can be our wedding present. You know she wants a fancy wedding. In a garden.”
“Of course she does. With a string quartet, fairy lights, and tiny food. And it will be beautiful.” I could see it now, and I hoped to the very depths of my soul that it happened one day.
“Can we really make this work if I have to come out? I’m terrified of what the doctor will tell me. I’m a nervous wreck over this.” His head bowed.
Burnt sugar fear tinged Grif’s rain scent, and I pulled him to me, holding him tight and comforting him the best I could. I’d text AJ later to let him know to give Grif some extra care tonight. Maybe he could bring home those empanadas from that place Grif liked.
“We’ll make this work. We’re a pack and that’s what we do. Don’t worry about Verity, I’m sure she’ll love you no matter what.” I rubbed his back as I put out soothing pheromones to help calm him down.
He got an odd look in his eyes. “I know.”
