Page 99 of The King's Man
Kit’s mouth quirked at the corner and he had to take a quick breath and look away. ‘Perhaps the only one I had but, as Thurloe reminds me, I can’t afford to have friends in this business.’
‘What about me?’
He looked at her. ‘Thurloe sent me to look for you. I found you. There is no more to it than that.’
‘So I was just another job?’
He nodded. ‘Just another job.’
Thamsine lowered her head and dropped her hands. ‘I see. I thought … ’
Kit turned away from her, running his hand through his hair. ‘You were wrong, Thamsine. I have enough concerns of my own without the encumbrance of friends of any sort.’
She sighed. ‘If I had been honest with you when we first met, would things have been different?’
He grasped for words that seemed to have entirely escaped him, hating the lies coming from his mouth. ‘Would I have betrayed you to Thurloe? I don’t know, but I do know that I could have protected you from Morton.’
He turned back to her, holding her by the forearms and seeking out her eyes.
‘Thamsine, I’m too used to lying. It comes naturally to me. A moment ago I told you that you were nothing more to me than just another task Thurloe had set me.’ He took a step towards her and this time it was he who took her by the forearms, seeking out her eyes. ‘I can’t lie about that anymore. You are one of the very few people in this world I call my friend.’ He took a deep breath. ‘And I think I might have a solution to your problem if you are willing.’
‘Go on,’ she said slowly.
‘Marry me, Thamsine.’ The words rushed out.
She stared at him.
‘If you marry me, then your problem with Morton will vanish.’
‘If I marry you, I marry a whole set of new problems,’ she replied. ‘For instance, I don’t know if you’ll be alive next week.’
He shrugged. ‘Then you will be a wealthy widow and free to choose whatever man you wish. Jane told me of the terms of your father’s will. If you marry someone other than Morton, he loses his control over you. Even if I were to die next week, you will be free of him and have full control of your own estate.’
She smiled, a small, bitter smile. ‘And what do you get from the arrangement? A solution to your financial woes?’
‘I want to be clear about this, Thamsine. I don’t want your money. I confess it would be useful, but if you wish we can enter into an agreement by which I forgo my claim on your property. It will be a proper business arrangement.’
She clapped a hand over her mouth and for a moment he thought she was going to cry or throw up. Instead, she laughed.
‘Kit, that has to be the most romantic proposal a woman would ever want to receive.’
Kit bridled. ‘This isn’t about romance, Thamsine. This is about practicalities. Think about it, if you wish.’
He turned his back on her and kicked at the fire before turning back to face her.
‘Marriage to me wouldn’t be so bad, surely? We … seem to get on quite well, and … ’ He paused. ‘I can’t think of anyone else I would rather marry.’
She shook her head. ‘No,’ she said slowly, ‘I don’t think it would be so bad, Kit, and I don’t need to think about it. It sounds like a perfectly sensible solution to my woes. When did you have in mind?’
‘As soon as possible. Tomorrow?’ he said. ‘I have found a celebrant who does not ask too many questions. Jem and the girls can stand witness.’
‘I see you have it all planned,’ Thamsine remarked dryly. ‘You assumed I’d say yes?’
He looked at her. ‘I don’t have time to spare,’ he said. ‘If you said no, it would have made no difference.’
She rose to her feet and crossed to him. She took his hands. ‘Thank you, Kit. I know how difficult this must be for you.’
He caught her fingers in his and looked into her steady brown eyes. He longed to kiss her, wrap his arms around her, breathe in the scent of her and lose himself in her. He wanted to tell her he loved her, and that, far from a business arrangement, his heart rejoiced at the thought of marrying this woman.
