Page 116 of By the Sword
Despite himself, Jonathan smiled, remembering a similar conversation with Tom. ‘No, I don’t, but there is a lady who lives at Seven Ways. I hope to marry her one day. She has a boy who is a little older than you, called Tom. He’s your cousin.’
‘What’s a cousin?’ Tabitha asked.
Jonathan explained about cousins and told her about her aunt Eleanor and little Ann and the new baby.
’So I do have a family?’ Tabitha ventured at last. ‘Grandam said I had no one left to love me or take care of me when she died.’
Jonathan flexed his fingers at the thought of Judith Woolnough.
Tabitha looked up at him, her eyes wide and bright. ‘When am I going to see them?’ she asked.
‘Sometime soon, I hope,’ Jonathan said.
Now he knew Tabitha was safe and cared for, he would write to Kate and explain the situation as soon as he reached France. Quite how he would explain the appearance of a hitherto unknown daughter defeated him for the moment.
‘What’s this lady’s name? The one you’re going to marry,’ Tabitha asked.
‘Mistress Ashley.’
Tabitha frowned. ‘So when you and Mistress Ashley get married, she’ll be my mother?’
Jonathan considered that question for a moment, as he untangled the complexity of family relationships.
‘Of course she will be,’ he said.
Tabitha contemplated the ground for a moment. ‘Is she kind?’ she asked in a small voice.
A rush of pity for this child who had only known kindness from one person in her whole life swamped Jonathan.
‘Very kind,’ he said.
That seemed to satisfy Tabitha. She straightened and looked up at him. ‘So when are you going to get married?’ she demanded.
Jonathan took Tabitha’s little hand in his. ‘Not for a little while.’ He steadied his nerves. ‘I have to go a long way away, kitten. If I don’t the soldiers will come and put me in prison.’
‘Did Grandam send the soldiers after you because you took me?’ Tabitha’s voice shook.
‘No. It’s nothing to do with you,’ said Jonathan. ‘I am a soldier and I fought in a big battle. We lost and I need to hide somewhere safe for a little while.’ He paused. ‘Tell me, Tabitha, do you like Aunt Henrietta and Uncle Nathaniel?’
She nodded. ‘Very much.’
Jonathan took his courage in both hands and said, ‘Where I am going, kitten, I can’t take you with me.’ Her eyes widened andshe opened her mouth but before she could protest, he put his finger to her lips. ‘Hush and hear me out. You are going to stay here with Aunt Hen and Uncle Nat until it is safe for me to come home.’
‘You promised.’ Her wail cut him to the very core.
‘I know, Tabby, but I have to go and I have no money and nowhere for us to live. Where I am going I can’t take you with me. Here you will have a warm bed and someone to love you and I promise no one will beat you. Aunt Hen wants you to stay very much. She has never had a little girl of her own.’
She looked at him, her face crumpled with pain. ‘You promised you wouldn’t go away again.’ With a strangled sob she flung herself off the wall and ran into the house.
Jonathan sat with his head in his hands, listening to the sound of her retreating footsteps and hearing again her mother’s plea. Take me with you. Please take me with you.
Oh, Mary, why didn’t you tell me you were with child? I would have taken you away. I would have left you at Seven Ways and Tabitha would have grown up there…Why…?
He raised his head and stared despondently at the river, gliding by on its timeless and ceaseless course to the sea.
For all her angry words, surely his mother would have grown to love Mary and once she held her granddaughter all would have been forgiven? Perhaps at Seven Ways, Mary would not have died? How different things could have been?
Every life he touched he seemed to hurt: Mary, Tabitha, Kate and even Stephen Prescott.
