Page 103 of A Recipe for Love
The penny in Bella’s head refused to drop.
Adam knelt on the slightly damp ground, leaning on the outer wall to his father’s garden. His mother was sitting, legs crossed neatly in front of her, opposite him. He wasn’t sure how long they’d been here like this, but he knew it was the longest he’d spent with his mother in twenty years.
‘I know I have no right to say anything.’ She leaned forward and took his hand in hers. ‘I know I gave up the right to barge in and tell you what to do.’
He shrugged. ‘I wish someone would.’
‘Well it sounds like you’re feeling trapped.’
He couldn’t argue with that.
‘And I do know what that’s like.’ She turned her head towards the view up the cliff. ‘It’s mad. A place like this where everything’s so open and so beautiful feeling like a prison, but for me it did. So all I can say is that you can walk away. I did. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.’ She extended a hand as if to touch his cheek and then pulled it away. ‘Leaving you was…’ She shook her head. ‘But leaving here, it was the right thing. I would have withered away. I don’t know if there’d have been anything of me by now left if I’d stayed.’
Adam shook his head. ‘You weren’t the laird though. I have a responsibility.’
‘You have a responsibility to yourself as well though. You’re young. You’re single…’
‘Actually I’m engaged.’
His mother stopped. He could see shock on her face but then she smiled and nodded. ‘Right. Well congratulations. I don’t know why I assumed.’ She pulled her hand back from his. ‘I suppose I still imagine you as a kid, even though…’ She pointed at the man in front of her. ‘Silly of me. So what does this fiancée want you to do?’
‘I think Bella is fine anywhere.’ That was the truth. She had an adaptability and an ability to fit in that Adam didn’t share.
‘So what do you want?’
‘I want to be home.’
‘Isn’t this home?’
Of course it was. When he was in Edinburgh he referred to visiting Lowbridge as ‘going home’, so why didn’t it feel like that now he was here? Because this was home for Adam the child and now he was expected to be the grown-up in every single room. ‘It was Dad’s home.’
His mother stared down at her knees. ‘It certainly was. He would never even think about leaving,’ she added with a hint of bitterness in her tone. ‘But why shouldn’t you? What would you do if you weren’t here?’
That was easy. He’d go back to Edinburgh and carry on with the life he’d promised Bella when he’d asked her to marry him. Realistically Lowbridge would be better off without him as well. The McKenzie estate had money and a vision and probably offices full of accountants who would be horrified of the mess Adam was making of everything. He knew his grandmother would be furious, and he was pretty sure Darcy would see it as betraying his father, but without a laird who was worthy of the title the whole thing was hanging by a thread already. Letting Lowbridge go might be the best thing for everyone.
The Ladies’ Group dispersed. Bella followed Flinty into the kitchen. Veronica and Darcy had tried to help by stacking cups on a tray but Flinty had taken over when Veronica had been defeated by the challenge of making space for the cake plates.
Standing alongside Flinty with a tea towel in her hand and the white noise of the hot water tap filling the sink gave Bella a moment of relative calm. She told herself it was none of her business and she should keep her nose out. She told herself that Flinty’s reaction to whatever Anna had been insinuating was a clear signal that she did not want to talk about whatever it was. But there clearly was something. ‘Flinty?’
‘Yes.’
‘What was Anna driving at in there?’
‘I don’t know what you mean.’ Flinty had been wiping the same cup with her washing up sponge for way too long, but she clearly wasn’t a woman about to give up her secrets.
Bella thought back over the conversation.Maggie’s always taken care of the Lowbridge women… working up a sweat in Nina’s back shed… Maggie would love to see more of you…
Surely not. But at the same time, why not? It definitely wasn’t her place to ask. Bella dried a saucer in silence and tried to think of something else, anything else, to talk about. She told herself not to ask. Who was she kidding? ‘So you and Veronica?’ she let the question hang.
‘What about us?’ Flinty’s gaze was fixed straight ahead.
‘You’ve known each other a long time?’
‘Since we were girls,’ Flinty confirmed.
‘And… Anna seemed to be implying that you were…’ Bella was wishing she hadn’t started the sentence.
Flinty put down her washing up brush, flicked the soap suds from her fingers and turned to face Bella. ‘Well, spit it out love.’
