Page 4 of A Dream of Redemption
“Is there something urgent you need her for? I can always send a servant to fetch her.”
He stood up straight and made to leave the room. “No. It can wait.”
“What can wait?” Marisa asked as she breezed back into the room.
Mr. Homeward’s demeanor changed in a flash. A look of reverence entered his gaze as he approached Marisa. “Your Grace, I need to find a suitable time for you and me to pay a visit to the orphanage you have just acquired in Southwark. I think it should be sooner rather than later.”
As Marisa took her seat, she asked, “Did you look in my diary?”
Mr. Homeward flashed a look at Helen as if to sayI told you so.
“Yes, but the only date free was the sixteenth.”
Helen sat up straight. Marisa would be away that day. That was during the few days that Maitland wanted to surprise his wife with a romantic liaison. She couldn’t let her sister agree to a trip on that day. But how could she stop her without giving the surprise away?
She cleared her throat. “Marisa, would you mind if I got more involved in your charity work? Perhaps I could take the lead on this new orphanage. With Mr. Homeward’s help that is.”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea.” Mr. Homeward’s tone was quite emphatic.
She leaned forward and ignored the virile man glowering at her and spoke to Marisa. “Since I am putting my other plans on hold, I need something to do with my time. I’d really like to help; you are getting too busy.”
Marisa looked at Mr. Homeward before looking at Helen. “I’m not sure that’s a good idea. It’s a new orphanage, and we have not really taken stock of how it is operating. You—your sensibilities—may be shocked at what we find.”
Helen wracked her brain to think of another reason Marisa could not agree to that date. If she could shoot daggers at Mr. Homeward she would. “Mr. Homeward was just implying how superfluous my life is. I really do want to help. Please let me do this,” she asked softly.
“Clarence!” Marisa scolded.
“I’m sorry, Your Grace, but I did not imply any such thing. I merely said you put the orphanages first.”
Marisa nodded and Helen could see her chewing her bottom lip, which meant she was thinking. “Do you know you are right, Clary. Ihavebeen putting them first and Maitland keeps reminding me I also have a family. Since Aunt Alison passed away, I have need for another helper. I give a lot of my time to the orphanages and it’s very rewarding but my husband and children need me too.” She turned to Helen. “Are you sure about this? If you want to take charge of the Southwark orphanage it will be a lot of hard, and often painful, emotional work. You’ll lose your heart to the children and it will become a lifelong commitment.”
Wasshe ready? Mr. Homeward’s eyes bored into her as if daring Helen to say yes. He was usually Mr. Calm, so totally collected, quiet, and emotionless, blending into the background, but right now his eyes blazed. She wanted to say yes just to see his reaction. However, she did not want to commit for the wrong reasons. The children deserved a total commitment.
Helen thought about the orphans Marisa had helped and she’d seen the joy her sister took from it. At the moment Helen’s life was empty. She lived in her brother’s home with his wife and children and felt like an imposer. Her sister and her brother both wanted her married off. Oh, she understood they wanted her happy too, but if she said yes to helping with the Southwark orphanage, her life would have some purpose. Then she could keep busy and let fate take a hand in sending her Prince Charming.
Besides, she grinned to herself, it would annoy Mr. Homeward.
“I would be honored if you’d let me become more involved, and I vow I will not let you down.”
She could almost swear that she saw steam coming from Mr. Homeward’s ears, and for a second she also thought she saw fear in his eyes. But when she looked again all she saw was anger. She sat up straighter.
Marisa clapped her hands together. “Perfect! Maitland will be pleased that I’m sharing my responsibilities. Clary, arrange for a trip to Southwark at your earliest convenience. You may have to meet with Helen beforehand to go over how our orphanage reviews are conducted.”
Mr. Homeward’s face was a mask of calm once more. He simply nodded at Marisa and said to Helen, “If you could send me a note when it would be suitable to meet?”
“Certainly. If it’s all right with Marisa, I’ll have a small desk moved in here too. Then I shall be close by should you need me,” and she smiled sweetly at Mr. Homeward, wanting to needle him more.
“That’s a wonderful idea, Helen.” Marisa smiled. “Now, Clary, if there is nothing more, Helen and I have a shopping trip to plan.”
—
Clary’s teeth were grinding as he calmly took his leave of the ladies. As much as he would’ve liked, he didn’t slam his office door, but closed it quietly behind him, and then he cursed. And cursed. And cursed.
His day had started out badly and just got a whole lot worse. His latest lover, a young opera singer, had decided she wanted more than he was prepared to give. More than they had agreed on when they’d started their affair, and on her way out of his bed this morning she’d almost unmanned him when he politely declined her offer and then ended their liaison.
Despite the life he had been forced to live as a young boy, he still enjoyed sex. Craved it even. However, he did not trust anyone, let alone himself, enough to let another person too close. Everyone in his life had deceived, lied to, or abused him. He was not about to open himself up to any type of intimacy. Sex—freely indulged sex—was necessary and enjoyable, and if he trusted no one he could never be hurt again.
But this, this having to work with Lady Helen, was far worse.
