Page 36 of A Love to Remember
If he came to Kirkwood’s house party and stayed, she would have an opportunity to talk with him. She still had no idea what he might want more than to be a martyr for Robert. She only hoped that, surrounded by her friends, she would find an answer.
Chapter 11
Christmas had been a quiet but joyous affair. The highlight for Rose—and for Drake, too—had been the gift from Philip to Drake—a young gelding named Crusoe.
In his note to the boy, Philip had explained Crusoe was looking for a fine young man to be his first owner. He was a good jumper and very partial to apples but had a few tricks—like standing on people’s feet or trying to unseat his rider under the trees.
The bad weather had meant Drake had only been able to ride the horse around the stable yard. So it was no surprise that the boy begged to be able to take Crusoe to Lord Kirkwood’s so that he might go riding with Lord Cumberland—and, of course, thank him—in person.
The thoughtfulness of the gift gave Rose hope. It seemed unconscionable that Philip would continue to refuse to have children of his own. If only she could make him see what a wonderful father he would be.
Drake had been almost impossible to manage the last few days because he was so excited about seeing Henry again, as well as Lord Cumberland. Sebastian and Beatrice were on Kirkwood’s guest list. So were the other Libertine Scholars—all except Arend and Isobel. As Isobel was due to give birth in a few weeks, Arend had decided they would remain at his estate near York.
On the day before they were due to leave for Wiltshire, Rose sat at her writing desk going over her lists. Surely she didn’t need to take as much as this to Lord Kirkwood’s—although the manor could be quite cold even despite the fires his staff kept burning all day and all night. Drake’s cough seemed to have disappeared. She did not wish to risk it returning.
Picking up her quill, she tried to see what on earth she could leave behind.
She was about to scratch off the second fox stole from the list when her lady’s maid entered, carrying two of her hatboxes.
“We are going to need at least three carriages to carry everything on your list, Elaine,” Rose said laughingly. “Is there anything we can leave behind?”
“There is nothing on that list you will not need.” Elaine shrugged. “Or could possibly need. We should be prepared for anything.”
Rose nodded. “This is why traveling is such a chore. It’s hard to know what one will require and therefore what one should take—or leave behind.”
“There is something that needs to beaddedto the list.”
Rose groaned. “I can’t imagine what.”
Elaine gave her a shrewd look. “Your rags. I’ve had them ready for the last two weeks. I thought your monthly courses would’ve come by now.”
All the air rushed from Rose’s lungs, leaving her dizzy. With shaking hands, she set the list down on her writing desk. “That can’t be right. Are you sure?”
“I keep your schedule,” Elaine said. “You’ve been as regular as clockwork, except of course, when you were expecting Drake.”
Rose let one hand slide to her stomach. “You think I’m with child.”
She couldn’t help the smile that curved her lips. The prospect of having Philip’s child thrilled her. She let herself bathe in her happiness, refusing to let the thought of what Philip might think ruin her joy.
“I can see you are extremely happy about the possibility,” Elaine said.
“Yes, I am. But, Elaine, we must keep this between ourselves. If Iamwith child it’s very early on. There is no point in raising hopes”—or causing problems—“until we know for certain.”
“Shall I ask the doctor to call? I could say that you’d like him to attend His Grace one last time before we travel.”
Rose shook her head. “No. You know how gossip works. I believe none of my staff would talk, but I cannot vouch for the doctor. No one must learn of my condition until I speak to Lord Cumberland.”
She knew exactly when his seed had taken root. How ironic, that on the very night they called an end to their affair, she became with child. Surely it was a sign that fate had decreed they should be together as man and wife.
“He will have to marry you now.”
She could not deny it. However, nor could she help but wish that Philip had chosen to marry her instead of being forced to do so.
Anyway, it was early days yet. She needn’t tell Philip immediately. She could still use her time at the New Year’s house party to influence Philip. To show his sacrifice in its true light of a martyrdom Robert would never have condoned, rather than a symbol of duty and love.
“At least they are one less thing to pack,” Rose said weakly.
Elaine smiled. “I still have the last of your gowns to pack. I assume you wish to wear the lilac gown, and the fox fur cape and throws. And don’t you worry, Your Grace. I’ll make sure His Grace is wrapped up like a mummy.”
