Page 20 of A Love to Remember
Rose couldn’t argue.
Once more settled in her seat, Portia sipped her tea, then sighed. “I don’t know what to say, Rose. I’m so sorry. Just wait until I see my brother. Of course he’ll have to marry.”
“No.” The last thing she needed was Portia scolding Philip. “Please don’t say anything. He has his reasons. I hope one day he’ll wake up and realize he’s been a fool. I only hope that day is not too late for me.” Forthem.
“Well, it’s not going to be.” Portia’s cheeks blazed with crimson. “Just wait until I tell Mother. She’ll have something to say to him about his duty to the earldom.”
Dear God. That was the last thing she or Philip needed. “Don’t do that. I do not wish to betray his confidences.” What was said between them was private.
Portia’s eyes narrowed suddenly. “What do you mean you hope Philip’s coming to his senses isn’t too late for you? You do think Kirkwood will want you to remarry?”
She shrugged and sipped her whisky-laced tea. It was the first time since Philip left that she’d felt warm. “I suspect he’ll want me to change my ways for Drake’s sake if nothing else. I’m only six and twenty. I like intimacy. I enjoy sex. If I remain a widow, it will mean a lonely life.”
Portia had lost her angry flush. Now her cheeks went pink. “I enjoy bed sport, too, but only with Grayson. I can’t imagine having sex with any other man.”
Rose didn’t take offense. “I didn’t have the luxury of marrying where my heart led so I suspect our experiences in the boudoir have been quite different. I discovered pleasure only after my husband died.”
“Does Philip know Lord Kirkwood might insist you remarry?”
She smiled at her friend. “You are not going to let this go, are you? Yes, Philip knows. Lord Kirkwood is a kind man, so I hope he won’t force the issue. But he is also very fond of Drake, and soon I suspect he’ll tell me to send Drake off to school. Then I will be truly alone.”
She blinked back the sting of tears at the thought of seeing her son for only a few months a year. “I can’t live my life stuck in the wilds of Cornwall on my own. I want a man in my life. I would like more children. If Kirkwood is concerned about the Deverill name he’ll make a push to see that I remarry. He won’t compel me to accept a particular man, but he’ll expect me to select someone.”
Portia’s face took on her thinking look. After a few moments of silence and sipping fortified tea, she said, “I can’t believe Philip would let you marry someone else. Oh! That’s it.” She leaned forward in her chair and excitedly placed her teacup on the table with a rattle. “We’ll put it about that the Wicked Widow is husband-hunting. I know my brother. I know he loves you. Whatever nonsense is stopping him from proposing, his possessive jealousy will never allow you to marry anyone but him.”
But Rose was not so sure. Would the idea of her marrying another man bring Philip to his senses? She knew he cared for her. They were more than compatible in bed—they were combustible. Dared she hope? “He was very determined not to marry.”
Portia waved Philip’s determination away. “I think I know my own brother. Of course he wants to marry. He loves you. He loves children. There is something more afoot here, I can feel it. You have to make him jealous.”
Rose laughed. Could she make him as jealous of another man as she’d been of Lady Abigail? She’d wanted to slap the smile off that perfect, simpering face. “It seems such a childish notion.”
Portia scowled. “So you are simply going to give up? I thought you loved him.”
“I do,” she protested vigorously. “But sometimes love is not enough.”
Portia waved that idea away, too. “Love is always enough. More than enough. Love is all that matters.”
Rose’s heart sank. “Then he does not love me. If he did, he wouldn’t have left my bed knowing I might have to marry another.”
“Oh, my dear girl.” Portia’s smile was that of a cunning fox. “Knowingandwitnessingare two very different things. You should have seen Grayson’s reaction when he thought I was seriously considering Maitland as a marriage prospect. A rival tends to crystalize a man’s view on love very quickly.”
Perhaps it was the large amount of whisky in the tea but suddenly Rose’s life no longer felt like it was over. Hope—something she’d lost—began to bloom inside her. She put down her teacup and picked up Serena’s invitation. “Bugger your brother. I’ll attend Serena’s dinnerandbring a charming dinner guest.”
Portia’s smile in response was just as mischievous. “I shall make sure Philip is there. I’ll say Grayson has information on a new market for the Flagstaff wool. He’ll be interested in that. And I’ll say you are unable to attend. After all,”—she shrugged—“what’s a lie between siblings?”
Rose laughed. “You are wicked.”
Portia’s smile dimmed. “I just want you both to be happy. Why can’t you be happy together? I love you both so much.”
Emotion welled up in her. “I love you, too.”
Portia blinked and glanced over to where her half-full cup sat, contents gently steaming. “If I drink any more tea I won’t be able to walk with you to the park, and I want to see that handsome boy of yours.”
Rose was more worried about the effects of the whisky. “Thank you, Portia. I don’t know if our plan will work but you’re right about one thing. It’s better than doing nothing.” She got to her feet and walked to her friend, pulling her up to stand beside her. “Suddenly I find it’s a beautiful day and, after our indulgence, I need some fresh air.” She handed Portia her hat. “Shall we?”
“Absolutely, dear girl. And while we walk we shall make up a list of the most desirable single men in London at the moment.”
Rose laughed. “I think I’m going to enjoy this experiment a tad more than poor Philip,” she called over her shoulder as she went to organize her coat, hat, and gloves.
