Page 19 of A Love to Remember
Portia smiled, a rueful twist of her mouth. “It almost sounds as if you want to get rid of me already. Have you got a previous engagement?”
She felt her face heat. “No engagement. Drake has gone for a walk in the park with Henry and the nannies. I thought I would join them.”
It was the first time she had lied to her friend, but she knew if Portia stayed for long the conversation would stray to her brother. Admitting to herself that their affair was over was painful enough. Putting it into actual words—making it public—hammered home the reality that she would never be a real part of Philip’s life again.
“Oh.” Portia glanced around the room. “When did they leave?”
“Not long ago,” Rose said.
“We’ll have at least an hour, then.” Portia removed her hat and placed it on the seat beside her. “The boys will want to romp all afternoon. Did you receive Serena’s invitation? Won’t it be fabulous to all be together for a change? Well, I mean, without other company so we can talk freely. I don’t think we’ve caught up on everyone’s news properly since we stopped Victoria destroying our husbands and families.”
Here it was, the moment Rose had been dreading. She took the coward’s way out. “Yes, and it’s such a shame I won’t be able to attend. Kirkwood has requested a private supper that night. I’m disappointed at the clash but it can’t be helped.”
“Really?” Portia frowned. “I understood Serena checked the dates with us all before selecting that night.”
“She did.” Rose crossed the fingers of one hand behind her back and pointed to the stack of open envelopes with the other. “I’ve only received the news today.”
“I hope nothing’s wrong. It’s not like Lord Kirkwood to require your attention on such short notice.”
“I’m sure it will be nothing of note.”
Portia clapped a hand to her forehead before declaring, “Gosh, I hope it’s nothing to do with Philip’s behavior at the ball the other night.”
This time it was Rose’s turn to frown. “What on earth would Kirkwood have to do with that?”
“You did mention that Lord Kirkwood had suggested you look at remarrying. I suspect he thought Philip might offer. In fact,I’mwondering why Philip hasn’t. Perhaps Kirkwood took Philip’s behavior as a signal he is not considering you for that position. Silly, I know. Philip would never marry the likes of Lady Abigail. He’s in love with you.”
She tried, she really did, but Portia’s words brought forth the pain of loss, and her eyes instantly welled. Desperately, she tried to blink them back before Portia noticed. But her friend noticed everything and immediately pulled a face filled with horror.
“Oh, dear. Lord Kirkwood has not forbidden the match? Is that why both you and Philip were not at Lady Chillingworth’s ball last night?”
She couldn’t talk through the knot in her throat; she merely shook her head.
“Then what on earth is wrong?” Her eyes narrowed. “The other night my brother took off from that ball as if his breeches were on fire. I thought he’d come to beg your forgiveness.”
Rose sniffed and took out a handkerchief. “He did apologize.”
Portia sat back, satisfied. “So he should. It was badly done of him. Are you hiding because of his dance with Lady Abigail? Who cares what society thinks? I never have. Philip is yours and you know it, so no more hiding. I missed you at last night’s entertainments. Philip attended but stayed only briefly.”
Rose hesitated, not knowing what to reveal. She wanted to carry on as if nothing had changed, but she knew Portia would keep pushing and it would not take her long to guess why they were no longer seen together. She’d rather Portia learned the truth in private than in public. Rose might not be able to contain herself if that happened. Here in her drawing room, it didn’t matter.
She took a deep breath and said, “Philip and I have agreed to end our affair. I just need some breathing room. That’s all.”
Portia’s mouth dropped open. “No.Why?” She looked like she was ready for a fight. “Did you break my brother’s heart? I thought you loved him. I thought you’d marry him when he proposed—”
“I would have.” This time Rose didn’t try to hide her pain. She simply let the tears roll down her face. “But he didn’t propose. He doesn’t want to marry me.”
Portia was by her side in a flash. “I’ll poke his eyes out. How dare he prefer a chit like Lady Abigail.”
She shook Portia’s arms off her. “No. He is not marrying Lady Abigail, either. He told me he has no wish to marry.”
Portia’s mouth dropped open and then closed, then opened again. “Many men seem to think marriage a bore but I would have thought my brother had more sense. He will marry eventually. He needs an heir. I thought he’d marry you.”
Rose wiped away her tears, feeling somewhat better for having gotten the situation off her chest. “He’s adamant. He will not marry. You forget you have brothers—Thomas, it seems, is to inherit, with two more brothers in reserve.”
When the maid arrived with the refreshments, Rose set about pouring the tea.
Portia waited until the servant had closed the door behind her. Then she stood, seized the whisky decanter from the sideboard, and poured a little into their cups. Seeing Rose’s raised eyebrow, she grimaced. “I feel a little fortification is called for.”
