Page 14 of A Love to Remember
Serena placed a hand on her arm. “Are you sure you want to leave, Rose? There could be an explanation for his behavior.”
So eventheyunderstood how dishonorable Philip’s actions had been.
She shook her head. “I really don’t care what people think, but if I don’t leave now I might slap his face if I see him.” Grief lodged in her throat. Made it hard to speak. “I don’t understand. I’ve never treated any of the men who professed to love me this way.”
“I agree with the slap.” Portia sounded almost bloodthirsty. “I’d like to kick him in the family jewels. But Serena is right. This is unlike him. There must be something else behind his behavior.”
Perhaps. At that moment Rose hurt too much to care. She squeezed Portia’s hand. “Thank you. I must go. I’ll be fine in the morning, but tonight I need to lick my wounds in private. Walk out with me, Marisa?”
“Of course.” Without a moment’s hesitation Marisa linked her arm through Rose’s and, chatting brightly, escorted her out to her waiting carriage.
—
After one of the most insipid dances of his life, Philip strode toward the refreshment table. Thank Christ that bloody display was over. It finally dawned on him how difficult it was going to be to misdirect his mother for much longer. She was unlikely to leave the matter of his marital status alone, but after tonight perhaps she would turn her attention to one of his brothers. He needed a drink. Then he needed to find Rose—and sanity.
“I could kick you where it bloody hurts.”
Surprised at his sister’s vicious whisper, he accepted the snifter of brandy the servant offered and turned to smile down at her. His smile faded as he recognized her calm mask. Portia only wore that expression when she was furious. “What’s wrong?”
She blinked at him. “And for that stupid question I just might get Grayson to bloody thump you, too. Very badly done, brother.”
He took a long-suffering sip of the spirit. No doubt he’d need it. “What am I supposed to have done?”
Portia’s eyes blazed but her face remained calm. “Are you really so unfeeling? Don’t you understand what that waltz with Lady Abigail signaled to everyone here?”
Damn Lady Abigail. And damn his mother’s interference. “It signaled that Mother is determined to see me riveted to some chit. You know what she is like. One minute I am talking to her and wishing I were anywhere else, and the next I find myself escorting some vacuous debutante onto the floor. It meant nothing.”
“Did it?” Now the polite mask slipped. “It certainly meant something to Rose. And to theton. Everyone now believes you’ve discarded your mistress to start hunting for a wife. Lady Philomena couldn’t wait to rub Rose’s face in it.”
Philip’s heart dropped to the soles of his shoes. A curse on his mother. How could a woman of only five feet, two inches manipulate him into something so stupid? Because, as usual, he hadn’tthought. And he’daskedRose to come tonight. He went cold. “Goddamn it to hell.”
Only as he frantically scanned the room for her did he realize the buzzing groups at the edge of the dance floor were casting covert glances their way. If he was the subject of speculation and gossip, then Rose—
“Where is she? I need to explain—”
“Gone,” Portia snapped.
Stunned, Philip swung his gaze back to her. “What?”
“I said she’s gone.” Portia’s cold mask was once again in place. “What did you expect? Thetonbelieves you’ve publicly announced the end of your affair. She’s heartbroken that you’d treat her so cruelly.”
His fists clenched as he silently cursed his mother—and himself—to kingdom come. He’d known the moment his mother had come over with the simpering Lady Abigail that she was up to something. Why had he not found a way to thwart her? But as always, he hadn’tthought. All he’d seen was a chance to get his mother off the scent for a while by dancing with a young lady.
The entire set had been bearable only when he imagined it was Rose at his side. Rose’s hand he held. Rose’s face lifted up to his. That face appeared in his mind’s eye now, pale and haunted. Because of him. But he would never have ended their affair this way. Never hurt her like this. She had a place in his heart. If Robert had not died at Waterloo, then perhaps they could have been happy together. She was the only woman he wanted, needed. And yet he couldn’t give her what she deserved—his name.Thiswas his punishment for causing Robert’s death—to grieve the woman he…cared for.
Sebastian was right. He was being unfair to Rose. It was time to set her free.
But first, he had to beg her forgiveness for his actions.
He put down his drink and, ignoring both Portia’s attempts to stop him and all the avid eyes of theton,he shouldered his way out of the ballroom.
Chapter 5
Philip stormed up the steps to the Duke of Roxborough’s townhouse.
Before he reached the top step, the door was opened by Rose’s butler. Booth had recognized his carriage. Normally, Philip drove it round the back out of sight of wagging tongues.
“Her Grace is not at home, my lord.” Booth’s pointed stare at the Earl of Cumberland’s recognizable equipage parked in full view of the street told Philip of his faux pas.
