Page 36 of A Whisper of Desire
“It’s after two?” Marisa threw back the covers. “I don’t have time for a bath. So bring me some hot water to wash with while I eat, and I need my riding habit. I intend to visit with Beatrice after my talk with Maitland.”
—
Marisa arrived outside Maitland’s study at exactly three o’clock. Her hand hesitated before knocking, her fist hovering in the air, afraid to strike. This talk could inevitably change her marriage, and she would have to live with the consequences.
She took a step back from the door, fear slicing through her. Courage was harder to summon than fear. It was only when she spied the footman looking at her strangely that she gathered herself and knocked before what little courage she had escaped her.
“Come” was the gruff command, and with head held high, she entered and closed the door behind her.
The study was exactly how she’d imagined it. Everything orderly and in its place. It was as if no one worked in it at all, but she knew as duke her husband spent most of his day behind the large walnut desk.
She was beginning to understand that Maitland required life to be tidy—orderly, even. She, on the other hand, usually lived in chaos, the maids and Susan having to constantly tidy up after her.
Maitland stood before the fire, warming his hands as if he too felt the cold dread in the pit of her stomach.
“Take a seat, Marisa. We have a lot to discuss, and I can see you’re thinking of riding this afternoon.”
Why did he have to look so handsome, even with his severe face on? She wanted her husband, much as she hated to admit it. She prayed she’d be strong enough to resist him until he realized she was not here at his beck and call.
“I’ve asked my brother to take me riding later so I can soften him up before we tell him our plan.” She watched Maitland assess her statement and believe it.Fool.Marisa would be questioning Sebastian about Priscilla.
“That sounds sensible. We have no engagements tonight, so I have asked your brother and Hadley and Arend for dinner. We will give Arend our answer then, before they go to the Top Hat on their scoping exercise.”
It was beginning to grate on her, this calm, serene, unflappable persona of his. It was time he became her favorite pincushion. A few well-placed pricks and he should be jumping.
“You already know my stance. I think Arend’s plan is clever. Don’t you?”
“Clever, yes, but also risky.” He grimaced and abandoned the warmth of the fire to claim a chair not behind his imposing desk but next to her. On a sigh he stretched his long legs across the space until they almost touched his desk. “It puts you in direct danger, something I promised myself and your brother I would never do.”
“I’m not sure the danger is as direct as you imagine. Even if we are exposed, this Angelo is not a stupid man, nor is he reckless. I’m sure he’d not harm me if he thought a ransom was payable. Everyone knows how wealthy you are.”
He nodded and let his head lean back over the chair. She watched him close his eyes and could almost hear him thinking. She decided to pursue her argument. “Besides, I’ll simply sit quietly by your side and no one will be any wiser.”
His eyes snapped open and he turned his head, riveting his gaze on her face. “There is more to your role than that.”
She couldn’t imagine what. “I can’t play the cards for you, or perhaps I could play too and simply lose?”
He sat up straight, his boots planting firmly on the floor, and he reached for her hand. “The Top Hat is like any other gentlemen’s club. There are various forms of entertainment.” He paused, as if waiting for her to respond.
“I am not naïve, I had a rakish brother, do not forget. I realize that there are women who sell their bodies.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Not just women.”
“I assume you mean there are male prostitutes. Forgive me, I’m still a little unsure of how a man has sex with a man.” Her cheeks felt as if they were on fire. “I realize they could use their mouths and hands…”
“I’m not sure this is the time for that conversation. You’re a clever woman, use your imagination. The Bible mentions the act, and also it is illegal in England.”
“How sad, and I might add unfair. You can’t help who you fall in love with.”
She watched his face soften at her words. “I’m not sure ‘love’ is the right word. ‘Lust,’ perhaps. However, I agree. I don’t think any man, given the penalties involved, would choose to be attracted to other men. They just are. An accident of birth, perhaps.”
His reference to love as lust was interesting. “You don’t believe in love? How can you not when you see it around you everywhere? Look at Sebastian and Beatrice, Grayson and Portia, Christian and Serena.” She pushed her point. “You, and the other Libertine Scholars. Don’t tell me you don’t love them as if they were your brothers.”
He shifted uncomfortably in his chair. “We are getting off the point. What I was delicately trying to impart was the fact you will see things that may shock you. Men with men, men with men and women, and we will be expected to go upstairs to take advantage of the rooms they offer.”
She smiled at his obvious discomfort. “Hardly scandalous; we are married.”
His face reddened. “It’s likely we will be watched.”
