Page 59 of The Lands Defying
The way it shakes and strains.
The way it trembles.
My stomach revolts, Drax growling so violently within me, and my eyes move to the figure on the dais.
He smiles, his eyes on her, only her, as she tries to hold back her cries, as she doesn’t make another sound after I raise the whip and mark her again.
I hold back my full strength, only doing it hard enough to appease him, but I’m still hurting her.
Her or my brothers, her or my brothers.
I repeat again and again.
I saw the crystal. It shows what she did. I’m doing what I need to for the lands, doing what I need to so I can protect my brothers.
They didn’t betray anyone.
The rogures killed my family, took away any calm, any love.
Any softness in my life.
My stomach revolts as the whip comes down—
My eyes fly open wide, my heart beating so fast I can barely stifle the sound of my heavy breathing.
There is a shake to my limbs, a tightness in my chest as I clear away another nightmare.
Fuck.
A small sigh comes next to me, and my arm curls tighter around the body in my arms, sleeping soundly, feeling her warmth.
My nose comes to her hair, and I inhale, nuzzling the back of her head, knowing she’s safe.
The urge to get up and find somewhere to stop the itch in my back nearly overwhelms me. It takes everything in me not to do it, just like the last time when Rhea woke to me leaving. It’s hard to stop the habit I created to punish myself, especially after having a nightmare about it.
But I vowed to her, and I would not break a vow to her again.
“Another one?” a quiet voice asks, and I still, then sigh in defeat.
I loathe showing weakness to anyone, but he’s seen it all.
I get my breathing under control before I gently, and reluctantly, remove myself from Rhea. She whines, her brow furrowing, and I quickly grab a spare fur next to me and roll it up, pressing it against her back so it feels like I’m still next to her.
Standing on silent feet, I stretch my neck out and walk over to where Leo rests against the wall. I slump down beside him and run a hand down my face.
“I thought maybe they would go after you two talked it out,” he says on a whisper, not wanting to wake the others.
“I don’t deserve them to go away.”
Nightmares are the only thing I see when I sleep.
Leo only knows about them because most nights after I went to the basement, I would sleep in my office, and I would wake, sweating and panting, and he would be there, seeing it all.
Another punishment.
I’m close to all of my brothers, but Leo is my closest.
“No one deserves whatbothof you have been through,” he says, his tone low and solemn.
