Page 108 of The Dark Rising
“You didn’t stop them either,” I tell him. “You stood back and let them do it, told me my pain had only just begun,” I grind out, swallowing down my grief.
“In a room full of that many Highers and Charles himself, I couldn’t have done anything and everyone in that room would have been in danger. I did try to get Charles to listen to me, but he cut me off. I thought it would make matters worse if I persisted.” I settle a little knowing he at least tried, even if it did no good. “I believed you were a traitor at the time, the cause of the rogures,” he growls and my eyes go back to him. “It’s what I believed then,” he repeats, like he’s reminding himself.
“And now?” I bring my eyes back to him. “Do you believe me?”
“I already told you I do,” he grunts, his eyes bouncing between mine. “But you don’t believe me, do you?” he sighs. “What will it take for you to believe me?”
“It’s... a lot to process,” I say, and his jaw ticks. In one, swift motion, I’m picked up, moved and placed onto the bed.
Darius looks around the room and heads for the table. He swipes some cups off without a care, and I watch startled as they crash to the floor. He then puts the table on its side. With a hand holding it steady, he lifts his foot and brings it down on the leg of the table. The wood splits and he grabs it, twisting it until it snaps. I watch, my mouth open that he just broke a piece of furniture. He brings the broken leg of the table to me, then he reaches into the back of his pants and pulls out my knife.
“What?” I blink up at him.
“Carve and listen,” he says, and I look down. I haven’t carved in so long. I run my fingers over the wood, then tentatively run my knife over it. It’s clean, not a spot of Darius’s blood on it, which I’m glad for. Just the thought has my stomach rolling.
I take a breath, breathing in our mixed scent that are so familiar to me now. Hints of sweet and rawness wrap around me, and I wonder if it will get stronger, add more of our scents together to create something unique that is just us.
Will I allow it?
“I know it will take a lot for you to trust me, we haven’t had that with each other before, have we?” Darius asks, and I nod as I start to carve away at the wood. “Even with the blood oath, that is just reassurance that I won’t betray you, but I will prove to you that I won’t. No matter how long that takes me.” He crouches down in front of me, wiping off some wood shavings that have landed on my leg. “What I said to you yesterday, I meant it, every word. Like I said, I’m not asking for forgiveness, I only wanted you to hear that I regret a lot when it comes to you, now more than ever.” I start rounding off the edge. “The distance between us is, admittedly, driving me insane. I’m constantly pulled toward you, and I think you don’t feel the full effect as you are not one with your wolf.” I think about that for a moment. I do feel the pulls, but I agree it does feel a little muted. So just how strong is it for him? My eyes flick up to his, but he’s watching me carve the wood. “I’m not a male that is patient when it comes to you. I have no boundaries when I want to know something, no, it’s a need to know everything about you. But, little wolf, the connection isn’t making me want to know that, it’s just… you.” My hand stalls on the carving, and his covers mine, holding it firmly as we make another groove in the wood. “Even though I didn’t know who you truly were, I think, no, Iknewdeep down who you were. I tried to ignore it.“ He laughs at himself. “But I should have known I could never ignore you. It’s impossible to do so.” My cheeks heat at that, and he reaches up and runs a finger over my jaw. “Do you know how you escaped Wolvorn Castle?” he asks, and I frown.
“We ported out of there,” I say slowly. He already knows this.
“And how did you get the port stone?”
My brows pinch together. “Anna had one. She said she woke up with it.”
He nods, shifting where he sits. “Who gave it to her?”
“What?” I ask, pausing in my carving.
“Who gave it to her?”
“We don’t know, we suspect it was Edward.” He said he would try and get us out of there, and it’s the only explanation that he gave it to Anna.
“It wasn’t your friend,” he spits, still hating I’m talking to another male.
“How do you know that?”
His eyes bounce between mine. “Because I gave it to her.”
Thirty Nine
Rhea
IstareunblinkinglyatDarius, trying to process his words. I shake my head, unable to believe what he’s saying, at what he’s telling me he did.
“I—” I what? What exactly am I trying to say here?
“I gave it to her after I came to you in your cell, after I did what I did to you.”
“But why?” Why would he do that? He didn’t believe me then, he didn’t believe my words.
“The moment I left your cell, I stopped at the entrance to the dungeon and I knew I couldn’t leave you there to rot. You were wounded after I whipped you, bleeding and in pain. I didn’t like seeing you like that.” His jaw clenches. “No matter how, at that time, you were a traitor, no matter if you were the cause of the rogures, no matter how you lied and killed. I just couldn’t leave you there,” he sighs and runs his finger over the wood. “Do you know how much it took within me to place that port stone on Anna? Hoping she would be able to get close to you to be able to get you out of there.” He shakes his head. “I’m an Elite, I uphold the law, I drag traitors back to the Highers or kill them to protect Vrohkaria. That’s my duty. By placing that stone with Anna, I turned my back on it.”
His fist clenches, but his eyes never leave mine. He looks… troubled, and I don’t like seeing this side of him, it makes me uncomfortable. A troubled Darius is not a good thing, yet I crave it.
He’s seen me vulnerable more times than anyone else, and with him showing me another chink in his armor, I take it all in and keep it close.
