Page 110 of The Dark Rising
“We will find something, Edward’s good with his word. He even told me you were coming to The Deadlands.”
“How did he know that?” His brows furrow, looking at me closely.
“Can I tell you another time?” He starts to open his mouth but I lift my hand and put it over his lips, silencing him. “This is not me keeping a secret from you. It’s just that this isn’t mine to tell, it’s for his safety. If this was my secret I would tell you.”
“Would you?” he asks behind my palm.
Would I? He told me his regrets. He’s told me he’s sorry and I believe him. He also helped us escape Wolvorn Castle, went and got something precious to me out of my cave and has been protecting me ever since, so why wouldn’t I? I look down to the middle of my forearm before I look back up at him. “Yeah, Darius. I would.”
His eyes hold mine, that connection zapping into place and he nods, nipping my hand and I remove it from his mouth. “Fine, little wolf, but you will have to tell me eventually.” I do. “I don’t like the idea that he knows you are here. How did he know that?”
“I have no idea how to be honest. Edward always knows. I think he has Ilium keeping track of me at times, but I know he has many Croneians.”
“If he can find you here, then others can. We may need to look for somewhere else to move to. But also.” He stands, cracking his neck as he stares down at me. “If he’s a father to you, why isn’t he here? Why hasn’t he come to see you?”
I get up and walk over to the bedroom door, Darius following behind me. “He’s important, and he has important dealings.”
“If you say so,” is all he says, and I get that he’s not happy with not knowing everything. I turn toward him, but then suddenly find myself eye-to-eye with his ass.
“Stop throwing me over your fucking shoulder, Darius,” I growl, my fingers digging into him.
He chuckles, biting the curve of my ass. “I don’t see why not,” he says, walking out the bedroom and down the hallway. “I like looking at your ass before breakfast.”
Forty
Rhea
Aknocksoundsonthe door to the spare room that I have been coming to every now and then. It’s also the room where I hid the book with entries of what happened to me. I’m not sure where the book is now, and I haven’t asked Darius, not wanting to bring it up and sour things between us. I’m not sure where we both go from here, though he is pretty clear with what he wants, I on the other hand, am just taking it day by day.
I walk over to the door and open it when another knock comes. Josh stands on the other side, his hands in his pockets as he looks down to the floor.
“Can I come in?” he asks, voice soft. I sigh before standing to the side to let him in. Moving to the end of the bed, I sit with my legs crossed, hating the conversation we are about to have but know it’s a long time coming.
Seems a lot of things are being said out in the open lately.
He moves to the chair in the room near the small desk, grabbing it and sits down in front of me. Resting his arms on his knees, he’s silent, messing with the bun he has in his hair. It’s a move I know he only does when he’s unsettled.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers eventually. I pick the side of my fingernails, biting my lip. “I never should have asked you to remove your glamor. It was wrong. I have no excuse.”
I believe he’s sorry, I do. But. “You hurt me,” I tell him, and he sucks in a shaky breath, nodding. “It was something I never wanted others to see. You only saw it because you got me out of that basement, and I made sure to have it blocked from Kade’s memory when Edward did that for me.”
“I know, Milal. I should have never done that. I honestly don’t know what came over me.”
“It’s the mating bond, Josh,” I tell him, and he freezes, looking up at me. “You think I didn’t know?” His gray eyes turn wide, but sad, and I know it’s because he didn’t talk to me about it. “A bloodmate’s bond trumps all and everything. I can understand that. What you did still hurts, I feel betrayed. You used the fact that you saved me from a place I had no choice in being as a weapon to get what you wanted. Used the fact that I have always felt like I have owed you for that.”
His head drops, and he runs a hand over his face. “You never owed me. Never.” He shakes his head and clenches his fist on his knees. “I just, I was crawling out of my skin to get to her, and it felt like everyone was my enemy, standing in my way. You were collateral damage of that.” His jaw ticks. “I’m so fucking sorry, Rhea. I’m ashamed of myself for what I did. You are the sister I never had, and I cannot believe I did that to you. I wasn’t myself.”
He looks so dejected, and I know he won’t forgive himself for what he did. What he made me feel like I had to do. I hate this rift between us. We have had arguments over the years, sure, but we have never been this far apart before. I need him. He’s my brother, my chosen family, and I know he will carry this for as long as he lives.
“You can never do that to me again, Josh.”
“Never,”he says down the link, and I feel the hum of the blood link between us for the first time in what seems forever. It’s a welcome comfort, but also comes with pain at the empty spot that’s there from Kade.
It’s that thought that stops me. We can’t be like this with each other, we have lost so much already.
“I’m so happy you found her. I really am. You deserve to be happy, Josh.” I pause. “What Darius did outside Witches Rest…”
“I deserved it, it’s why I didn’t even defend myself,” he says quietly before tilting his head. “He said he will not hurt you again, you know.”
