Page 58 of Best Kept Secret
“What?” Millie gasps again.
“He may not have given him the pills or shoved them down his throat,” I continue. “But my dad was the reason Levi couldn’t take it anymore”
Millie stares at me for a long moment as I continue navigating the streets. And I know what she’s thinking. I can almost hear her thoughts, even without her saying a thing.
“My father isn’t a nice man,” I explain eventually. “My mom said he changed after his injury. And he took it out Levi and me, forced us into the life he lost.
“After Levi died, my mom suffered a breakdown. She was never the same. I was a freshman in college when Dad her sent off to an assisted living facility without even talking to me about it first. He doesn’t even bother visiting her anymore.” My stomach twists at the thought of my mom. “He tries so hard to control me, like he controlled Levi, but what he doesn’t realize is that I know the truth.” I shrug. “And as much as he gets to me sometimes, as much as he pushes me and pushes me and fucking pushes me—” I grit, gripping the steering wheel so damn tight my knuckles crack. “As much as he tries to get under my skin, I won’t let him. I’m living for me now, and for my brother.”
I release a shaky breath, turning to see Millie watching me, a glistening tear track trailing down her cheek.
“So, that’s what happened last night,” I say with a small smile. “I let him get to me, and when he gets to me, the darkness pulls me under.”
Millie reaches for my hand again, weaving her fingers through mine and squeezing hard. “I’m so sorry that happened,Logan. All of it. To you. To Levi. To your mom. It isn’t fair,” she whispers, her own voice trembling with obvious emotion. “And I hate that you’ve never been able to tell anyone. But I need you to know, you can always count on me to be there to help bring you out of that darkness, no matter what.” She squeezes my hand again, smiling through her tears. “Always remember that I’ve got you.”
I squeeze her hand back, and despite the heaviness, we settle into another companionable silence, and I hold her hand the entire way home.
Mille and I haven’t spoken much after what we shared in the car, and as I open the door to the apartment, standing aside to let her enter first, the air between us is thick in a way that makes me nervous, but in a good way, like the anticipation and excitement that brews deep in my stomach as I walk through the tunnel and skate out onto the ice every night before a game. Now that I know she knows the truth, things definitely feel different.
I toss my keys and my wallet on the table by the front door, feeling her closeness as she removes her jacket, causing her intoxicating scent to unfurl and weave through the air. And I swear to God, I’ve never wanted to spin around and grab a woman, kiss her with such ferocity as I want to right now. But I don’t. I stand here, like a fucking imbecile, staring down at her goddamn tube of cherry lip gloss lying in the bowl on the console table.
“I’m going to have a shower and go to bed,” Millie says behind me. “I’m really wiped after today.”
“Yeah,” I say with a forced chuckle. “Being a tourist is really… tiring.” I roll my eyes at myself because what?Nice one, loser.
“Well, goodnight.”
I close my eyes on an exhale. “Night.”
When I hear the gentle click of her bedroom door, I shake my head at myself.Idiot.
I’m in the kitchen, stirring my Moon Milk, about to go to bed, when I hear footsteps pad against the tile behind me. Turning, I’m a little caught off-guard at the vision of Millie standing there wearing her UM sweatshirt and those goddamn tube socks that come all the way up to her knees. Those motherfucking thighs.... I swear to God, she’s trying to kill me.
“Oh, sorry.” She hesitates, tucking her hair behind her ear. “I didn’t realize you were still up. I was just coming out to get some—” She points to nothing in particular, and then, with a sheepish smile, her cheeks flame adorably. “I was coming to get some Nutella.”
I smirk, leaning back against the countertop, folding my arms across my chest. “Don’t let me stand in your way.”
Walking around the island, she tugs at the hem of her sweater as she brushes past me, reaching up and grabbing her Nutella jar from the overhead cabinet, the movement causing the sweatshirt to ride up high enough that I catch a glimpse of the delicious curve of the bottom of her ass cheek. She turns to me then, her gaze traveling down my body, eyebrows bunching together. And when her eyes meet mine, she quirks a brow. “I think we need a rule that shirts are mandatory in all communal living areas?”
“Well, if I’m expected to wear a shirt, then you’ve gotta wear pants, Red,” I grit, dragging a hand down my face with a stifled groan.
Ignoring me, and taunting me even more it seems, Millie grins, pulling herself up to sit on the island counter opposite me, crossing one tantalizing leg over the other. I’m forced to turn away, biting down on the inside of my cheek to stop myself from doing something I know we’d both probably love more than anything. Since when did I become such a chicken shit?
“I didn’t know you wear glasses?”
I pick up my mug and turn back to look at her, pushing my glasses up my nose. “Only at night, when I read in bed.”
“You read in bed?” she asks, opening her Nutella jar.
“I do.”
“What are you reading at the moment?”
I watch as she dips the spoon into the jar, and I’m forced to avert my gaze from where she wraps her lips around it, slowly sucking the chocolate off. And, with a thick swallow, I silently plead the blood rushing to my dick to calm the fuck down. “Stephen King’sThe Shining.”
Millie’s tongue darts out to lick the corner of her mouth, and I feel it all the way down in my balls.
“Do you want, um”—I clear my suddenly dry throat—“some, um, some Moon Milk?”
